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re: Best roommate stories
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:11 am to djangochained
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:11 am to djangochained
quote:
We had a roommate who ate any food in the fridge.
I fried dog shite and watched him eat it
That reminds me.
I had a friend that would come over to my apt while nobody was there and fill one of those big plastic flasks with liquor and leave. We never locked the door.
My roommate got mad and took a piss in a 1/2 full Jack Daniels bottle and set it on the counter.
Like clockwork, this dude came over and filled his flask and was on his way.
Did this for a few days before someone said something to him.
0
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:17 am to Ton Chou
quote:
There's actual springs in their chief.
Who is their chief? And it sucks he has springs in him. He should get that checked out.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:30 am to Loungefly85
I had a couple of terrible room mates when I left it up to the school to match me after I didn't get my first choice room mates. One guy was absolutely filthy and threatened to kill himself a bunch. He stopped when I told him I had a shotgun in the closet behind the water heater and shells in the top drawer of my dresser.
Other room mate who later came out of the closet smoked in the bathroom and didn't have the decency to not jack off when I was in the room trying to sleep.
Other room mate who later came out of the closet smoked in the bathroom and didn't have the decency to not jack off when I was in the room trying to sleep.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:32 am to Pankins
quote:
My roommate had a random friend from work at the pizza shop. One day during the summer, random friend tells us he needs our help moving a couple things from his old house.
We get there and low and behold, he forgot his key. No worries, he says, and we help boost him up to a second story window to get in.
He gets a few random things, nothing of any real value. And I see a book I always wanted to read, so I ask if I could borrow it. He says of course, his old roommate is super laid back.
Later we found out he was a notorious klepto in his old dorm. I think we helped him steal random shite from lord knows who. Lucky we didn't get shot. I still have the book. It was a good read, lol.
I just had flashbacks of thr movie Wildcats with Goldie Hawn. Great movie btw.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:36 am to JOHNN
How could you not notice the taste difference in jack mixed with piss?
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:42 am to Hold That Tiger 10
When I first graduated law school, I had a roommate for two years. One day I got a call that the fire department was at my house; my roommate had accidentally burned down the fence. I didn't really care though because it was an excuse to get out of the office while it was still daylight and I got to take off on a Friday to build the fence and spend the day outside instead of in the office
Posted on 8/11/16 at 9:57 am to Hold That Tiger 10
There's a predictable amount of homorerotic-adjacent stories in this thread.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:11 am to Hold That Tiger 10
Threads like these always remind me that my groups of college friends and I were completely out of control compared to the average college experience
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:15 am to Ed Osteen
quote:
Threads like these always remind me that my groups of college friends and I were completely out of control compared to the average college experience
I've been reading through this and thinking back on some of my military roommates... there's one in particular that makes me wonder how we both managed to get out alive.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:16 am to blueboxer1119
quote:
A few times I'd be sleeping and get hit in the head with a shoe, which he threw to wake me up. He'd start sport banging these chicks all crazy like he was trying to put on a show.
pro move
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:19 am to windshieldman
quote:
One night while playing Dungeons and Dragons, Steve's glasses fell off and broke, hahahahaha I spilled my milk laughing so hard at Steve.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:24 am to Hold That Tiger 10
I had a roommate for a while that was an absolute poser that bought really expensive whiskey with Mommy and Daddy's $ even though I could tell he couldn't appreciate it. Hell, he'd pour a tiny amount in a glass and fill the rest up with Dr. Pepper 10.
I use to drink all of his good shite and go buy a 5 dollar bottle of Kentucky Dale to refill the bottle. Dude never knew the difference.
I use to drink all of his good shite and go buy a 5 dollar bottle of Kentucky Dale to refill the bottle. Dude never knew the difference.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:29 am to JOHNN
quote:
Great movie btw
Tub scene is all I remember, but I'd watch it again just for that.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:32 am to Pankins
there's a basketball court at the end of my driveway, before it there's a sheet metal overhang where our cars are parked under. Roommates friend made a basketball shot from other side of the overhang bout 75-80 feet back. Only one who ever did that to this day that was 2005.
This post was edited on 8/11/16 at 10:33 am
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:44 am to Hold That Tiger 10
Room mate and I went to a concert at the House of Blues in Dallas. I think we both blacked out, woke up with a couple strippers and some nasty looking Mexican chick sitting on the couch. Kicked them all out so I could go back to sleep. Roommate was on the floor passed out. Nothing was missing and sanitized the room the next day... That was 10 years ago, and I still wonder what happened that night. 
Posted on 8/11/16 at 10:53 am to Hold That Tiger 10
i had this roommate that was a big time flamer. i'm talking FABULOUS. one time we got in an argument about who sang "piano man". i bet him $20 it was elton john, and he said "it's billy joel, and if i'm right, you have to marry me." i never back down from a bet, especially from some fig like that. ended up he was right, so i took his stupid fruity arse to new york because he wouldn't shut up about it. so i'm front of this justice of the peace, and as a total joke i'm like "i do" LOL.
looking back, i feel bad just completely joking about the whole thing because we fight so much now. he served me divorce papers like i dunno 3 times, but I told him I'm never signing them because i don't want our kid growing up in a broken home like i did. forgot to mention we adopted a lil boy, but now it's like he's always at the office and never spends any time with us anymore.
looking back, i feel bad just completely joking about the whole thing because we fight so much now. he served me divorce papers like i dunno 3 times, but I told him I'm never signing them because i don't want our kid growing up in a broken home like i did. forgot to mention we adopted a lil boy, but now it's like he's always at the office and never spends any time with us anymore.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 11:04 am to Hold That Tiger 10
college roommate refused to throw away his trash. pizza boxes, beer cans, etc.
i started sliding them under his bed one day. did it for a few weeks til he figured it out. his parents came in town and his mom couldn't believe how bad his room smelled. she damn near high fived me when i told her what i'd done.
i started sliding them under his bed one day. did it for a few weeks til he figured it out. his parents came in town and his mom couldn't believe how bad his room smelled. she damn near high fived me when i told her what i'd done.
Posted on 8/11/16 at 11:06 am to link
quote:
i had this roommate that was a big time flamer. i'm talking FABULOUS. one time we got in an argument about who sang "piano man". i bet him $20 it was elton john, and he said "it's billy joel, and if i'm right, you have to marry me." i never back down from a bet, especially from some fig like that. ended up he was right, so i took his stupid fruity arse to new york because he wouldn't shut up about it. so i'm front of this justice of the peace, and as a total joke i'm like "i do" LOL.
looking back, i feel bad just completely joking about the whole thing because we fight so much now. he served me divorce papers like i dunno 3 times, but I told him I'm never signing them because i don't want our kid growing up in a broken home like i did. forgot to mention we adopted a lil boy, but now it's like he's always at the office and never spends any time with us anymore.
what frat were you in?
Posted on 8/11/16 at 11:09 am to Butch stones
quote:
Woke up one morning to see my roommate spanking it under his sheets.- rantfan
quote:
Had a roommate walk in on me spanking it under my sheets-Butch stones
Christ this was perfect!
Posted on 8/11/16 at 11:10 am to link
How's the sex?
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