re: 43 monkeys escape in Beaufort, South Carolina

Google "Morgan Island south Carolina"

Paddled over there on kayak when I was stationed at Parris Island. Sure as shite, it's an island with a bunch of monkeys on it.

There's also a facility on the mainland where they study them, which is where I assume the escapees are from. I think it's in Yemassee

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I spend a lot of time in and around Beaufort. I ain't sure that 43 monkeys running amuk would be noticeable....might even raise the area's respectability a little....

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Beaufort is beautiful, what are you talking about?

Inspired by Fr33manator, I'm currently in the car on my way down to do some reconnaissance.

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I spend a lot of time in and around Beaufort. I ain't sure that 43 monkeys running amuk would be noticeable....might even raise the area's respectability a little....

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That's ridiculous. Beaufort is an awesome place

Trump win and the natives go wild.

#43 He was a Kang

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/nov/07/monkeys-escape-south-carolina

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43 monkeys escape in Beaufort, South Carolina

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can any of them play defensive back?

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[On Morocco's contribution to the Iraq War] George W. Bush : Then of course there was Morocco, who pledged to send 2,000 monkeys to detonate land mines and perform at children's parties. Then there seemed to be some question as to whether or not Morocco had the monkeys, and I said, "Regardless of whether they have them or not, that sounds cool as shite and I want that." A special unit of 2,000 trained monkeys that we can send anywhere in the world to fight evil and make children laugh? Duh! Despite vigorous protests from my Cabinet, I put into motion Operation Primate Speargun. For one year, a special unit of 2,000 wild monkeys trained side by side with the 82nd Airborne down at Fort Bragg in total secrecy. In order to ensure a maximum covert operation, most of the training was done at night. I was heavily invested in the unit, so I'd often fly down to participate in field exercises, and one of the things I noticed during the exercises was that many of the monkeys would simply run off into the woods, randomly shooting their spearguns at each other or inanimate objects. So I asked my field commanders, I said, "How often had this been happening?" And they said that this type of thing had happened every single time. So then I asked a tough question, "Why do you think it's happening?" The Major said that his guess was because they were wild monkeys, and that they as soldiers didn't have the proper training to work with them. So I looked at 'em right in the eye, and I said, "But we're gonna get there, right?" He said, "I doubt it, Sir." I said, "Well, hold on, let me ask you this. Are they at least entertaining the children?" He said he'd have no idea of knowing, but that his guess would be no, considering it was a top secret operation and no one knew the monkeys were there, especially the children. At the end of exercises, all but forty monkeys had run off into the North Carolina woods. Speargun attacks along the I-95 corridor have increased 1,000 percent in that time. So let me just tell you this: if you're planning a car trip down to Disney World, don't stop at the rest stops, okay? 'Cause there's a 50-50 chance a malnourished monkey is gonna pop up out of a toilet, shoot you in the face with a speargun. But I could give a shite, you know? It's the Tiger Woods guy's problem now!

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A Will Ferrell impression..