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NFL Hoping 3rd Year Of 'End Racism' Painted In End Zone Will Do The Trick
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:14 pm
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:14 pm
quote:
NEW YORK, NY — After two seasons of fighting the evils of racism through the act of painting words on fake grass, the NFL is hoping a third year of "End Racism" painted in the end zone will finally do the trick.
Executives for the NFL voted unanimously to fight racism with the powerful phrase spelled out in end zones for the third year in a row, confident that it will make a lasting difference.
"This is the year that the NFL ends racism, once and for all. Third time's the charm!" said Commissioner Jim Hardleather at a press conference while surrounded by a dozen other old, white members of the NFL executive committee who also showed the courage to not dare recommend removing "End Racism" from the end zones for fear of being canceled.
"Commissioner Hardleather," asked one journalist, "How, exactly, do you suppose painting 'End Racism' in the end zones will end racism?"
The commissioner responded by pointing at the journalist and screeching, "Racist! Racist!" The journalist was summarily executed by a mob of other sports journalists and a bunch of old white NFL executives in the name of ending racism for good.
Some experts say racism has adopted a new identity, though the NFL declined to say whether or not they would paint end zones with "End Anti-Racism."
At publishing time, the NFL announced that next year they will seek to help their star players by writing "Stop beating your girlfriends" on the 50-yard-line.
LINK
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Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:19 pm to GumboPot
I can no longer distinguish between the Babylon Bee and real life.
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:20 pm to BigDawg0420
"Commissioner Jim Hardleather" should have been a dead giveaway. Everything else completely plausible. 
This post was edited on 9/13/22 at 3:22 pm
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:32 pm to GumboPot
And still on some helmets. Smith had it on his last night.
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:32 pm to GumboPot
quote:
At publishing time, the NFL announced that next year they will seek to help their star players by writing "Stop beating your girlfriends" on the 50-yard-line.
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:32 pm to GumboPot
This is truly some of the Babylon Bee’s best work.
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:35 pm to GumboPot
Thanks NFL!!
I for one am tired of seeing Whites and Asians attacked over the color of their skin.
I for one am tired of seeing Whites and Asians attacked over the color of their skin.
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:41 pm to GumboPot
Some of the players still had BLM on their helmets last night, completely ignoring the rampant fraud and felonies by the leaders of that organization
This post was edited on 9/13/22 at 3:43 pm
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:43 pm to JetsetNuggs
quote:
Some of the players still had BLM on their helmets last night, completely ignoring the rampart fraud and felonies by the leaders of that organization
That's (D)ifferent, they only ripped off white-guilt stricken morons
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:44 pm to GumboPot
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:45 pm to GumboPot
quote:
will seek to help their star players by writing "Stop beating your girlfriends" on the 50-yard-line
Bwahahahahahaha
Posted on 9/13/22 at 3:56 pm to BigDawg0420
quote:
BigDawg420
I can no longer distinguish between the Babylon Bee and real life.
Well that's pretty sad.
quote:
"Commissioner Hardleather," asked one journalist, "How, exactly, do you suppose painting 'End Racism' in the end zones will end racism?"
The commissioner responded by pointing at the journalist and screeching, "Racist! Racist!" The journalist was summarily executed by a mob of other sports journalists and a bunch of old white NFL executives in the name of ending racism for good.
If you couldnt spot that this was satire then I'm not sure how you can tie your own shoes or drink from your sippy cup.
This post was edited on 9/13/22 at 3:59 pm
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:00 pm to GumboPot
Wait...you mean to tell me painting it in the back of the end zones hasnt ended it?!
Shocked I tell you!
Shocked I tell you!
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:01 pm to GumboPot
Who are the racists they are referring to? We need names. What are their names? How can we end this problem if they can’t specifically name the people who are causing this problem?
We need reporters who have the balls to confront the NFL with these questions but none will because they would be fired. We are living in clown world.
We need reporters who have the balls to confront the NFL with these questions but none will because they would be fired. We are living in clown world.
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:01 pm to GumboPot
Is ending racism a harmful sentiment?
ETA: that last paragraph is solid tho
ETA: that last paragraph is solid tho
This post was edited on 9/13/22 at 4:04 pm
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:05 pm to Peter Venkman
quote:
This is truly some of the Babylon Bee’s best work.
Ehh
it reads like some rantard on this site waxing satirical about something they pretend doesn’t trigger them at all
quote:
The commissioner responded by pointing at the journalist and screeching, "Racist! Racist!" The journalist was summarily executed by a mob of other sports journalists and a bunch of old white NFL executives in the name of ending racism for good.
Haha i guess
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:05 pm to GumboPot
Too many white democrats to ever beat racism
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:06 pm to GumboPot
Premier league in England stopped kneeling before matches so either racism is solved or they don’t care anymore.
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:14 pm to GumboPot
I’d like to see some NFL teams wear ‘Prevent Election Fraud’ stickers on their helmets and paint ‘Protect Our Borders’ in the end zones.
Or is the NFL just pandering to one particular group?
Or is the NFL just pandering to one particular group?
Posted on 9/13/22 at 4:14 pm to Robin Masters
quote:
Premier league in England stopped kneeling before matches so either racism is solved or they don’t care anymore.
It was never about ending racism because it was really never a problem. It was about using sports and entertainment as a vehicle to guilt you into voting a certain way because if you did not vote the way implied you were racist.
But the players in that league likely never cared. They were just doing what they were told.
This post was edited on 9/13/22 at 4:21 pm
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