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re: How to Get Rich - netflix

Posted on 4/24/23 at 2:45 pm to
Posted by slackster
Houston
Member since Mar 2009
89840 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 2:45 pm to
quote:

You know the #1 problem married couples fight over? Money. You know a problem we have never fought over after being married for 9 years? Money. If it aint broke, don't fix it I say


This is the financial version of “ignorance is bliss.”

ETA- my ? To those with separate accounts- what problem does it solve? Or to put it another way, what problem does a joint account create?
This post was edited on 4/24/23 at 2:52 pm
Posted by armsdealer
Member since Feb 2016
12003 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 3:26 pm to
We don't have a true split, but my wife can't handle paying bills at all. She will let shite go late because "she forgot". Ever since I took over the checking accounts totally not a single thing has been late. She does all her spending my credit cards that she is AU on that are really mine. Can you imagine her credit cards sucked when she "forgot" to pay.

It's fine now, IGAF what she spends, having money was never the issue, it was just being lazy with paying stuff on time. I have 90% of our spending on autopay, can't forget if it is automatic.

We watched some of it and it was like watching a train wreck. I like this Ramit guy way more than someone like Ramsey. Ramsey is good if you need to get out of debt but his other money advice will keep you in the poor house.
Posted by Triple Bogey
19th Green
Member since May 2017
6203 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 4:21 pm to
quote:

Who does the saving? Do y’all save money? Do you have to do it on your own?


Well yeah, we both do. I handle all of the investment stuff, but we both save money in our respective accounts. Its really not too complicated.
Posted by DawgCountry
Great State of GA
Member since Sep 2012
31562 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 6:09 pm to
Why does it matter? Neither is advantageous over the other. We can both see each others accounts. Honestly never merged them when we got married and that was 10 years ago
Posted by Grinder
Member since Nov 2007
2305 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 6:11 pm to
quote:

I feel like when this topic comes up, it is mostly joined account crowd saying how this can never work, not a real marriage, etc. While the separate accounts crowd mostly says stuff like to each their own, and both ways work.


Spot on.
Posted by Grinder
Member since Nov 2007
2305 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 6:24 pm to
quote:

Someone will inevitably come in and try to argue for it, but the whole point of a married couple having separate bank accounts is to spend freely without judgement or having to ask permission of their partner. Doesn’t sound like healthy marriage to me


Married 22 years with separate accounts. Works perfectly for us.

It’s always interesting when this topic comes up.
Posted by bayoubengals88
LA
Member since Sep 2007
21360 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 7:41 pm to
quote:

I'd be curious to see the age breakdown of couples with joint vs. split accounts. We are both right around 30 and our friends mostly have similar setups.

34 and 27 (combined)
Posted by bayoubengals88
LA
Member since Sep 2007
21360 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 7:50 pm to
quote:

I think my wife and I could be more aligned but also think some separation is healthy

What makes you think that?
Posted by LSUSLU106
Member since Mar 2015
659 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 8:37 pm to
35 and 32 Joint accounts
Posted by saderade
America's City
Member since Jul 2005
26014 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 9:12 pm to
Lates 30s with joint account. But I have no idea what any of our friends do in their marriage.
Posted by lynxcat
Member since Jan 2008
24735 posts
Posted on 4/24/23 at 10:19 pm to
This thread went downhill.
Posted by thelawnwranglers
Member since Sep 2007
40483 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 12:20 am to
quote:

What makes you think that?


As long as we are saving I don't really need to fixate on the stupid shite buys or I buy
Posted by WG_Dawg
Member since Jun 2004
88695 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 8:37 am to
quote:

my ? To those with separate accounts- what problem does it solve?


As with most things, I think each persons's situation is different and whatever works best for them is fine and shoudln't matter if that woudnl't work for someone else. My wife and I have 5 total regular bank accounts between us and it works great for us.

-We each have a checking account. Very little "extra" money stays in either and it's where our paychecks are received and what bills are paid out of. My wife makes a good bit more than I do but she also is financially aloof. She pays a couple of the higher monthly bills and I pay the rest.

-We both have a standard savings account. This is for thigns that we want to do on our own if we feel like it. I guess the "NEVER SEPARATE" people would call this wrong because it's a mine/theirs situation but it works great for us. If she wants to buy an expensive purse or something she can do it on a whim without a second thought on how I'd feel. If I want to buy new golf clubs or renew my football season tickets I just go right on aheaad. It's not a joint decision because we intentionally have this fun/play money to treat ourselves with.

-We have a joint high interest savings account where much of the "extra" from checking gets set. We both contribute to it. This is a major cushion should some large unexpected expense pop up, it's also what larger/joint expesnse come out of. When it's time to pay for our car insurance for instance, or when we just resodded the backyard.

-Each of us have regular monthly transfers from our checking into our joint brokerage account with Schwab. Each of us has money pulled from our emmployer each month into 401k, and each of us sends additional money monthly from checking into a Roth.


All of the above would probably be a nightmare for some that have one single everythign but it works perfectly fine for us. My question is, if all our financial needs and goals are being met, and we're both happy mentally and have peace of mind this way, who cares if we still have things separate?
This post was edited on 4/25/23 at 8:40 am
Posted by slackster
Houston
Member since Mar 2009
89840 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 10:16 am to
quote:

My question is, if all our financial needs and goals are being met, and we're both happy mentally and have peace of mind this way, who cares if we still have things separate?


I don’t actually care, and I’m well aware that there are exceptions to the rule, but I can tell you my anecdotal experiences as a financial advisor suggest you’re the exception.

Most couples I see that maintain separate yours/mine accounts do so to avoid the conflict that arises from being on separate financial wavelengths. Separate accounts treat the symptom, but do nothing to address the underlying problem.

My question for you - if all of your financial needs are being met and your financial goals are being funded, why would it matter if your significant other spends money on frivolous things out of your joint account?
Posted by CarRamrod
Spurbury, VT
Member since Dec 2006
57968 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 10:29 am to
quote:

50% of marriages fail in divorce. If I had to venture, this would be one of the top reasons

so you are saying more failed marriages are because of joined accounts?
Posted by CarRamrod
Spurbury, VT
Member since Dec 2006
57968 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 10:32 am to
quote:

. It’s evidence that you’re not buying into the “mine is yours and yours is mine” of marriage. And if you’re not buying into that, it’s evidence of mistrust in the partner or in the marriage. And mistrust tends to snowball and lead to divorce
you could also say the exact opposite, what leads to divorce is mistrust, mistrust in the partner, because the "yours is mine, and mine is yours" lead one partner to spend more than they put is and thought that is ok because what "theirs is mine", right?
Posted by CarRamrod
Spurbury, VT
Member since Dec 2006
57968 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 10:41 am to
quote:

This is the financial version of “ignorance is bliss.”

its hilarious how both you and Upperdecker are so pretentious with your views and everyone is wrong except your way. Its really odd how you think there is only one way to do any of this.
This post was edited on 4/25/23 at 10:43 am
Posted by WG_Dawg
Member since Jun 2004
88695 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 10:43 am to
quote:

I’m well aware that there are exceptions to the rule, but I can tell you my anecdotal experiences as a financial advisor suggest you’re the exception.

Most couples I see that maintain separate yours/mine accounts do so to avoid the conflict that arises


I can totally understand that, and I'm sure many, many couples that have separate accounts are either 1)absolutely piss poor with finances or 2)are trying to keep secrets from each other. Neither of which is us though.

quote:

My question for you - if all of your financial needs are being met and your financial goals are being funded, why would it matter if your significant other spends money on frivolous things out of your joint account?



Because again the system we have now works perfectly for us and amkes us both happy, so why switch?
Posted by bayoubengals88
LA
Member since Sep 2007
21360 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 11:01 am to
quote:

As long as we are saving I don't really need to fixate on the stupid shite buys or I buy

That take seems 'neutral' at best. You said "healthy" and I was just wondering what about the set up is healthy.
Posted by slackster
Houston
Member since Mar 2009
89840 posts
Posted on 4/25/23 at 6:05 pm to
quote:

Because again the system we have now works perfectly for us and amkes us both happy, so why switch?


Your post said you had separate spending accounts so you didn’t have to worry about how the other person feels about your purchases. I thought that was a reasonable question to ask as a follow up.
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