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Started By
Message
Elderly couples...when one dies
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:24 pm
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:24 pm
Has anyone experienced the deterioration of the one still alive? Any tell tale signs and did you know this is what you were experiencing?
16
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:25 pm to mpar98
Lost my grandfather about 20 months ago. My grandmother is still going strong.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:28 pm to mpar98
Lost my grandfather in December 2012. My grandmother is doing fine but you can tell her mind is always on him. She gets really down sometimes even though she doesn't like to say it.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:31 pm to mpar98
quote:my grandmother and grandfather were married for 40 something years. They both live the last 15 years in bad health. When my grandmother died,my grandfather died about six months later.ETA. My grandfather quit eating,quit sleeping , and quit living when my grandmother died.
Has anyone experienced the deterioration of the one still alive? Any tell tale signs and did you know this is what you were experiencing?
This post was edited on 4/27/14 at 2:33 pm
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:35 pm to mpar98
My grandmother was totally dependent on my grandfather. She lost most of her will to live and died two years later. She became paranoid.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:36 pm to mpar98
When my great grandfather was still alive he lived for two years after his wis wife passes. He was still smiling and friendly, but you could tell that he was the loneliest he had ever been. He had been with her for over 75 years. He never really had time in his life when she wasn't there. Even though he lived a long and happy life and was surrounded by his huge family when he died in his sleep, I think he wanted to die. I don't think he wanted to live in a world where she was not around.
Even tough it is sad that he was so lonely, it was also amazing that even after 93 years of living through the best and worse times of the 20th century, he still wanted nothing more than to sit in his recliner with a cup of coffee and talk to the love of his life.
Even tough it is sad that he was so lonely, it was also amazing that even after 93 years of living through the best and worse times of the 20th century, he still wanted nothing more than to sit in his recliner with a cup of coffee and talk to the love of his life.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:37 pm to mpar98
quote:
Has anyone experienced the deterioration of the one still alive? Any tell tale signs and did you know this is what you were experiencing?
the outward signs that I have seen is basically depression....that leads to not eating correctly and also neglecting their own health by not going to the doctor, not taking meds, etc...
fwiw, the two folks are typically in the same age group and probably both have health issues to start with, so the connection between the death of one and the deterioration of the other may be something that we conjure up in our minds....
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:37 pm to mpar98
My dad died just over a year ago. My 72 year old mom is doing great.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:39 pm to mpar98
Pa paw died this past November. Me Maw died 23 days later.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:44 pm to mpar98
My grandmother lived to be 85 and died 9 years after my grandfather. She was always in great physical health and spent the last few years of my grandfather's life taking care of him, but once he died, she didn't have responsibilities anymore so her mind started slipping. The last few years of her life were the saddest, because she really couldn't remember anything for more than a minute or two.
This post was edited on 4/27/14 at 2:46 pm
Posted on 4/27/14 at 2:48 pm to mpar98
My paw paw died when he was 68. They were married for 50 years at that point. My grandma has a picture of him the day he started his own company, and has had it right next to her bed since he died. Every night for the past 21 years, she talks to the picture for a few minutes and kisses it before she goes to sleep. She was 100% ready to go when he died, and has been ever since then. She just stopped getting up out of bed to go do things during the day after that
Posted on 4/27/14 at 3:28 pm to mpar98
my grandpa spent nearly 20 years taking care of my grandmother while she slowly became sicker and sicker. when she died, he was so broken. I thought it would be just a matter of months before we'd lose him too. he ended up meeting a woman who made him happy again. they've been married for over 10 years now, and while she's not my most favorite person in the world and will never come close to the amazing person my grandmother was, she very likely saved his life and we got my awesome pawpaw back.
on the other hand, a very close couple of family friends both died within months of each other. he was so dead inside after his wife passed and couldn't go on anymore. it was so sad.
on the other hand, a very close couple of family friends both died within months of each other. he was so dead inside after his wife passed and couldn't go on anymore. it was so sad.
This post was edited on 4/27/14 at 3:30 pm
Posted on 4/27/14 at 4:03 pm to mpar98
My grandpa died in 2006 and my grandma was never the same. Slowly deteriorating mentally and physically, she didn't seem to have as much of a will to live her life anymore. She died a few hours ago
Posted on 4/27/14 at 4:29 pm to mpar98
One of my great grandmothers outlived my great grandfather by 20 years, lived by herself and was always happy. She died a week before she turned 90.
Now looking at my grandmother, I'm not sure if she would be as resilient if my grandfather goes first, they're much more dependent on one another.
Now looking at my grandmother, I'm not sure if she would be as resilient if my grandfather goes first, they're much more dependent on one another.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 4:29 pm to mpar98
It depends on the person. There are those that are able to move on, and those that are "ol' Dan/little Ann"
This post was edited on 4/27/14 at 4:30 pm
Posted on 4/27/14 at 4:56 pm to mpar98
Dad passed in 92. We could tell my mother was going down fast. She started hoarding, not bathing, and getting socially inappropriate. I saw the writing on the wall and started doing my homework on nursing homes. Dementia and depression got so bad I eventually had to put her in one. It was the only way I could maintain her safely.
Posted on 4/27/14 at 5:07 pm to mpar98
My grandpa lost it after my grandma passed. He lasted two more years, but he was a totally different person.
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