After dominating Washington last week in Tiger Stadium, the LSU Fighting Tigers (2-0, #2 AP) welcome the University of Idaho Vandals to Death Valley on Saturday night. Kickoff is set for 7 p.m. and will be witnessed only by those in attendance because, shockingly, no television network has opted to broadcast this contest.

Let’s learn about these Idaho Vandals. In all candor, there simply isn’t much to say about Xs and Os in this game, so let’s expand our horizons and immerse ourselves in the Idaho football program. Do you have anything better to do?

The Vandals are looking for their first win this season as Idaho dropped its prior two games against powerhouses Eastern Washington and Bowling Green. If you think Idaho will be intimidated by the atmosphere in Tiger Stadium, however, think again. The Vandals paid a visit to Baton Rouge in 1998 and, even though they lost to the Tigers by a score of 53-20, no doubt the current Idaho players have contacted the members of that 1998 squad to learn about their experience and benefit from it. Right?

I bet you did not know that the University of Idaho is located in Moscow, Idaho. Hell, I bet you didn’t know there was such a place as Moscow, Idaho. I didn’t. I bet you did not know that Idaho’s stadium, the Kibbie Dome (I am not making this up), can seat a total of 16,000 people. I bet you did not know that Idaho’s colors are silver and “vandal gold.” Not plain old silver and gold. Silver and vandal gold. I want to say my wife was thinking of having our powder room decked out in vandal gold.

I bet you did not know that Idaho is donning black helmets this year. Many will recall that the Vandals sported black helmets between 1965 and 1967. Right?

I bet you did not know that the “Vandal” mascot has deep historical roots, though not necessarily connected to the state of Idaho in any manner. The following definition of Vandal is taken verbatim from the official Idaho athletics website, govandals.com: “A member of a Germanic people who lived in the area south of the Baltic Sea between the Vistula and the Oder rivers, overran Gaul, Spain, and northern Africa in the fourth and fifth centuries a.d., and in 455 sacked Rome.” Now, if that’s not reason enough to stand up and cheer “Go Vandals!”, I don’t know what is.

And, of course, thanks to the hell raised by the Vandals in the fourth and fifth centuries, today we refer to people who intentionally damage property and engage in other acts of hooliganism as “vandals.”

A few quick Tiger tidbits before we geaux. With a win over Idaho, LSU will become the first team in college football history to win 40 straight non-conference regular season games. The Tigers haven’t lost in September since 2006 and have won a school record 19 straight games in Death Valley. And, for the first time in school history, on Saturday LSU will offer an all-you-can-eat Tiger Stadium buffet catered by Ruth’s Chris, open bar with premium liquor, and limo rides home to all 90,000 fans in attendance.

Kidding on that last one – just making sure you’re still with me here. This game’s quite obviously destined to be a snoozer. Hopefully the Tigers can build an early lead, put some youngsters in the game, and emerge without any injuries in advance of their SEC opener at Auburn next week. No vandalizing allowed in Baton Rouge this Saturday night.

Prediction:

LSU 55
Idaho 7

Geaux Tigers!