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We need a joke today.

Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:40 pm
Posted by LSUFanHouston
NOLA
Member since Jul 2009
40292 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:40 pm
Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Beethoven.

Van Damme: I'll be Mozart.

Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys, I'm not saying it.
Posted by alajones
Huntsvegas
Member since Oct 2005
35804 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:42 pm to
Why did the scarecrow win an award?















He was outstanding in his field.
Posted by UltimaParadox
North Carolina
Member since Nov 2008
51806 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:42 pm to
Not bad
Posted by alajones
Huntsvegas
Member since Oct 2005
35804 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:43 pm to
What was the Romanov family’s favorite coffee?













Tsarbucks
Posted by alajones
Huntsvegas
Member since Oct 2005
35804 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:44 pm to
How did the Emperor Diocletian cut the Roman Empire in half?














With a pair of Caesars
This post was edited on 3/10/22 at 5:48 pm
Posted by kywildcatfanone
Wildcat Country!
Member since Oct 2012
136475 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:45 pm to
quote:

We need a joke today.


Posted by alajones
Huntsvegas
Member since Oct 2005
35804 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:51 pm to
What do you call an anti war fish?













A paci-fish
Posted by When in Rome
Telegraph Road
Member since Jan 2011
36166 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:51 pm to
I laughed
Posted by mmmmmbeeer
ATL
Member since Nov 2014
10036 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:52 pm to
Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree?





Because it was dead.
Posted by sig2608
Member since May 2010
585 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:54 pm to
Why did the nurse have dirty/ red knees






Because she was the head nurse
Posted by DeltaTigerDelta
Member since Jan 2017
13536 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:55 pm to
That an alzheimers patient is pres and a gunker is VP.
Posted by Kcrad
Diamondhead
Member since Nov 2010
65550 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 5:59 pm to
Knock Knock

Who's there

The SS

The SS who

We ask the questions here!!
Posted by FredBear
Georgia
Member since Aug 2017
17006 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:01 pm to
When I was a boy I was visiting my grandparents and a preacher knocked on the door. I went and told my grandfather and he told me

If it's the Presbyterian preacher hide the chicken
If it's the Methodist preacher hide the alcohol
And if was that damn Baptist preacher sit on grandma's lap until I get there
Posted by tss22h8
30.4 N 90.9 W
Member since Jan 2007
18791 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:05 pm to
Why did Billy The Kid burn down Dodge City?












He wanted to be the toast of the town.
Posted by midlothianlsu
Midlothian, Texas
Member since Oct 2009
1782 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:05 pm to
What do you call a factory that makes just ok products?




Satisfactory
Posted by ThatMakesSense
Fort Lauderdale
Member since Aug 2015
15281 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:07 pm to
Why couldn’t the pony sing a lullaby?

She was a little horse.
Posted by tigerbutt
Deep South
Member since Jun 2006
26154 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:10 pm to
quote:

We need a joke today.


Look in your pants.
Posted by 14caratgoldjones
Uniontown, Al
Member since Aug 2009
1585 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:13 pm to
What do you call a blind Gynecologist?

A lip reader.
Posted by BeachDude022
Premium Elite Platinum TD Member
Member since Dec 2006
36406 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:13 pm to
What’s green and smells like pork?













Kermit’s finger
Posted by deeprig9
Unincorporated Ozora
Member since Sep 2012
73539 posts
Posted on 3/10/22 at 6:14 pm to
quote:

Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys, I'm not saying it.


Chopin vs Chopper? I don't get it.
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