re: What's the point of open marriages?

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That has to be an awkward car ride home. And, as has been said in here already, you can't un-ring a bell.

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We've learned to avoid newbies completely. And, we avoid parties or events with newbies.

I mean, we know you have to start somewhere, but, we'll let them work the kinks out first.

Experienced swingers can spot the couple who is potential trouble a mile away. There's usually an obviously unequal interest.

It's funny though. If I had to say what the most likely negative outcome is for newbies it's this. Men show up thinking, "oh boy, candy store" and seem to have forgotten that their wives are candy too.

And, then there's the issue of men who are a wee bit stunned the first time they hear their wife sound different than they've ever heard her sound before.

But, like I said, that's pretty much 100% a newbie problem. And, we avoid that like the plague.

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For clarification. We personally are into straight MFMF..............sometimes MFMFMFMFMFMFMFM.

The whole MMF thing or MMMMMMF thing doesn't really appeal to the Mrs.

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I'm really, really bad at waiting in lines. I get frustrated easily.

If any or all of this is your bag, and everyone is of age and consenting, do it til the wheels fall off. It just seems a bit too far out of my norm and very hard to contemplate.

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It implies no such thing... I understand why people do it and can see why peopl are against it. But someone not seeing how people are cool with other people fricking their wife does not mean they only married her for sex.

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Of course it doesn't.

But, since you know YOU married your wife for more than one reason, why would you ask me "what the point" of being married is if we aren't monogamous? The answer is obvious.

Write down your list of reasons to be married. Cross off monogamy. Everything else on your list is probably on mine.

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I think my fave is a room with about 5 couples. Only two couples is actually more awkward believe it or not. Cause, I mean, ya know, women can go constantly for 6 hours straight, but, um, guys have a refractory period.

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What's the norm here... your wife gets a turn w/ every guy? You get a turn w/ every woman? Is there an intermission? Is it strictly MF or is there MFM, FMF, FF, FFF, MM?

And him questioning that one aspect of marriage doesn't imply that he married for sex. It means he doesn't understand something. Dumb or not, him asking a question about that particular thing doesn't make his marriage about sex nor does it imply such.

You can ask "why would you buy a boat and let tommy take It out for a joyride?" that doesn't imply that you bought the boat for joyrides.

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No lines in MFMFMFMFMFMFMFMF

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so how often is one of the guys or gals just kind left in the corner because, you know, nobody wants to frick them?

or do swingers just not care about looks

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And him questioning that one aspect of marriage doesn't imply that he married for sex.

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I get this.

My point of saying it "implies" that is that quite obviously, one knows(or at least hopes they know) that most people get married for reasons beyond monogamy.

Hence, saying "what's the point" is self explanatory. The only way you can say "what's the point" is if you are NOT acknowledging that they are other reasons one might like being married beyond monogamy.

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You can ask "why would you buy a boat and let tommy take It out for a joyride?" that doesn't imply that you bought the boat for joyrides.

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This isn't the same question. An appropriate analogy would be asking someone who let other folks use his boat is to ask, "well, what the frick do you even own a boat for?"

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so how often is one of the guys or gals just kind left in the corner because, you know, nobody wants to frick them?

or do swingers just not care about looks

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Common question.

K. Couples in swinging are not a great deal different than a single guy in a night club hoping to close the deal with a girl. Difference being, it's a couple to couple. And, by definition, if one party isn't attracted, then the "couple" isn't attracted.

To extend that to a party, you wouldn't attend one where you weren't attracted to anyone or that no one else had shown an attraction to you.

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Do I have to walk over and ask permission to insert... or do I just slip it in?

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yes. You would.

You might be surprised to learn that yes, there is a pretty well defined etiquette established.

Some dude running around jumping on whatever he sees would quickly find himself asked to leave and uninvited to all future gatherings.

Hence, it's been a long time since I've even seen something that dumb.