re: Should I escalate a feud with my neighbor?

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Disputed grass that would be there for less than 12 hours most likely

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My wife and I bought a house two years ago on a dead-end street. On our side of the street are two lots and across the street is one lot. There is also a lot running perpendicular to my across-the street neighbor and mine. 4 families total, the other three families have lived here for 30+ years.

About six months ago, my wife tells me the wife of the house to my left came over and asked us to fix our fence so their dog doesn’t get out. Our fence was perfectly fine when we bought the house. Her adult son was mowing the yard on their side of the fence with a riding lawnmower and hit our fence breaking some boards into our yard. I told my wife not to worry about it and just patched it up from our side and went on our way.

Fast forward to today. I’m getting rid of a bed frame and some furniture from upstairs. Our trash gets picked up tomorrow. I kept the frame and furniture in our house after moving it downstairs yesterday as I didn’t want to leave it out for more than one day. This afternoon I went and placed it in a pile at the edge of my property line maybe overlapping onto his property by four feet. His house is literally 50 yards away from where I piled this debris.

We’re eating dinner tonight and he rings the doorbell. I got answer and he starts off with “I don’t want to be a bad neighbor, but...”. We then walk out to the pile so he can chastise me for placing the debris four foot over his property line. Apparently the guy who lived here before me would always stack stuff in his yard and he didn’t want to let that pattern start again. My wife hears him say he doesn’t want to be a bad neighbor so she comes outside. He tells me the debris won’t be picked up until next week and I tell him I’ll move the debris four feet clearly onto my property as I thought it would be picked up tomorrow morning (it had been outside for two hours at this point). My wife lets him know about the fence issue and he says that his wife told him their talk didn’t go well and he offers to fix it for us. I tell him not to worry about it because the plan is to do some renovating in that area in the next few years anyway, and I think he realizes he fricked up because he starts with the “I want us to get along, yadda yadda yadda” stuff. My wife walks inside and I just turn and walk away from him without shaking his hand (he didn’t offer it before I could walk away).

It’s clear as day their kid hit the fence the way it’s damaged. I was going to leave it alone, but after tonight I’ve gotta send the certified demand letter, right? Part of me wants him to fix it just to tear it all down in a year or so anyway.

Tell me how petty and trashy I’m being. Also tell me ways I can passively aggressively frick with this guy.

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His wife didn’t get what she wanted from my wife last time so now she sent him over for another salvo

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I’m starting to get behind the wife

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