re: My Husband Turned His Life Around. I Wasn't Prepared For How Much I'd Resent It.

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At least she realized she was being unfair to her husband and tried to make things better.

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the point is about her irrational jealousy over something positive her husband was doing, that didn't hurt her at all

i was originally going to write "didn't affect her negatively" but had to edit into the bolded part. why i had to do that is the point of posting.

That's why we divorce you

I will agree I don’t really see the reason for her article.

Like she was scrambling for something to write about.

this is why the "we need more empathy" argument is hollow. all it is, is an excuse to enable negative/pathological behavior

they want you to understand WHY the person did it so you feel bad for criticizing them. it's the rhetorical apex of this whole mindset that the author displays. the whole underlying point is to criticize those who make more optimal decisions, as if they're now a villain for doing so

and the best part is that he wasn't even going hardcore. 20 lbs in a year or whatever is a slight change in behaviors

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try and better yourself and see the pushback you get from those that you thought cared about you. they don't they care about you, they want you to be in misery with them and see your bettering yourself as an attack on them.

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Damn, this quote hit home. It doesnt start out that way though. They are all behind you at the start. I experienced this first hand with my family. I was 5-10 230#...in terrible shape. I got blood tests that show everything from almost an 8:1 Trig/HDL ratio and a basically incalculable LDL. I started working on myself. Learning about how to eat. I got into running. At the start, my fat family was a cheer section. A year and a half goes by, I'm still doing great. My mother basically says, quit talking about health stuff. She is referencing me talking to my brother, but the point is clear. I only wanted them to get on board so they could attempt to have what I have, and what they need. They are in worse shape than I ever was.

At this time, I have a 1:1 trig/HDL. I can run a sub 22 min 5k no prob. I can run over 10 miles straight with no issue. You would think they would look at me as some sort of expert and seek council. No. They avoid the conversation entirely. That's food addiction. You can tell because these people, when they do get the motivation to work on themselves, want to know what to add...not what to take away. They either want a pill...or they simply add vegetables to an overloaded plate or other unhealthy stuff.

Please tell me you’re not married.
If you’re single and weirdly bitter, or divorced and bitter then, okay, I see you rationalizing this derogatory thinking, but if you are married you really need to re-evaluate your attitude towards marriage and women.

crab (in a bucket) mentality

it's very real and that's not specific to a particular sex, but is 100% displayed in this article

it's closely related to social inertia. if you're doing bad and slipping, it's like when an object is at rest. it takes a lot of energy to get rolling and unless you use all of that energy, you'll stop again. same with once you do get improving, it's hard to stop.

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try and better yourself and see the pushback you get from those that you thought cared about you. they don't they care about you, they want you to be in misery with them and see your bettering yourself as an attack on them.

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He’s spot on with this part. Goes to the idea that insecurity is the worst human trait bc it drives almost all shitty behavior.

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crab (in a bucket) mentality

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I just learned this a few weeks ago, and man it is true. We've all heard "misery loves company" but I've never took it to mean much more than sad people don't want to be lonely or something like that. It is much deeper than that.