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Message
re: Moving in with SO
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:26 am to Philzilla2k
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:26 am to Philzilla2k
The same breed of trashballs who were getting divorces in the 80s, 90s, and 00s don’t get married now. It impacts the numbers.
2
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:26 am to Philzilla2k
quote:
This, if you don’t get married, you can’t get divorced
and you also don't affect the divorce rate
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:27 am to GreatLakesTiger24
quote:
The same breed of trashballs who were getting divorces in the 80s, 90s, and 00s don’t get married now. It impacts the numbers.
there you go
now if these people are trashballs, wouldn't it still be better for them to not get married and then divorce?
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:28 am to GreatLakesTiger24
quote:
The same breed of trashballs who were getting divorces in the 80s, 90s, and 00s don’t get married now. It impacts the numbers.
Which is a net positive and exactly what in getting at. If they live together and find themselves incompatible, they break up instead of getting married then moving in and realizing their life sucks now.
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:31 am to Salmon
quote:I don’t think I agree at all. A divorce between parents probably sets a better example than mom and dad just “breaking up”
wouldn't it still be better for them to not get married and then divorce?
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:32 am to GreatLakesTiger24
quote:
I don’t think I agree at all. A divorce between parents probably sets a better example than mom and dad just “breaking up”
Why are we automatically calling everyone in this situation parents?
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:33 am to GreatLakesTiger24
quote:
I don’t think I agree at all. A divorce between parents probably sets a better example than mom and dad just “breaking up”
considering just how much of a burden divorce is on relationships, I don't think this is true at all
you have had some incredibly bad takes this week
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:34 am to KINGCAKEZZZZ
A few months before we got married.
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:37 am to GreatLakesTiger24
Gen “family values” Y out here killing it
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:41 am to KINGCAKEZZZZ
Waited until we were married... for the whole deal.
Cohabitation prior to marriage increases the likelihood of divorce. There are some psychological and practical realities leading to that...
Millenials are getting divorced at lower rates because they are waiting so long to get married, not because they are cohabitating prior to marriage. When a woman waits until 30-32 years old to get married, a few things occur:
1) She's generally more mature and realistic about marriage.
2) She's ready to pop out a kid.
3) Her "marriage stock" is declining... (i.e. in another few years she will have significantly fewer choices on men to marry)
Regardless, a lower divorce rate is a good thing, but cohabitation prior to marriage results in a significant amount of societal problems (unwanted pregnancies, lack of social/familial cohesion, and a breakdown of traditional parental "roles")
Cohabitation prior to marriage increases the likelihood of divorce. There are some psychological and practical realities leading to that...
Millenials are getting divorced at lower rates because they are waiting so long to get married, not because they are cohabitating prior to marriage. When a woman waits until 30-32 years old to get married, a few things occur:
1) She's generally more mature and realistic about marriage.
2) She's ready to pop out a kid.
3) Her "marriage stock" is declining... (i.e. in another few years she will have significantly fewer choices on men to marry)
Regardless, a lower divorce rate is a good thing, but cohabitation prior to marriage results in a significant amount of societal problems (unwanted pregnancies, lack of social/familial cohesion, and a breakdown of traditional parental "roles")
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:42 am to BayBengal9
^ gets it
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:43 am to BayBengal9
quote:
Cohabitation prior to marriage increases the likelihood of divorce. There are some psychological and practical realities leading to that...
Link to stats?
quote:
When a woman waits until 30-32 years old to get married,
Link to this as well.
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:45 am to BayBengal9
quote:
Millenials are getting divorced at lower rates because they are waiting so long to get married, not because they are cohabitating prior to marriage.
you are going to have to show some data to back this up
quote:
but cohabitation prior to marriage results in a significant amount of societal problems (unwanted pregnancies, lack of social/familial cohesion, and a breakdown of traditional parental "roles")
if they are still getting married and with less divorce, I'm confused as to how this relates to these problems you listed
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:52 am to Salmon
Average age of marriage in US
Keep in mind this is heavily influenced by geography.
Because cohabitation often results in children. Children being born out of wedlock have more negative outcomes across the board, in general when it comes to education, crime, and other relevant stats.
The one place I do give credit to millenials (of which I am one), is that I know many who are married and raising kids that are not their own and doing a very good job with it and are excellent parents... so perhaps in 15 to 20 years we'll see that it all washes out. I certainly pray that is the situation.
Keep in mind this is heavily influenced by geography.
quote:
if they are still getting married and with less divorce, I'm confused as to how this relates to these problems you listed
Because cohabitation often results in children. Children being born out of wedlock have more negative outcomes across the board, in general when it comes to education, crime, and other relevant stats.
The one place I do give credit to millenials (of which I am one), is that I know many who are married and raising kids that are not their own and doing a very good job with it and are excellent parents... so perhaps in 15 to 20 years we'll see that it all washes out. I certainly pray that is the situation.
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:56 am to BayBengal9
quote:
Average age of marriage in US
yeah we know this
but I need data that says this is the primary reason why divorces rates are lower and it isn't a combination of cohabitation and increase in age
quote:
Because cohabitation often results in children. Children being born out of wedlock have more negative outcomes across the board, in general when it comes to education, crime, and other relevant stats.
I would like to see these stats for children born out of wedlock then the parents move on to get married
do you have those stats?
Posted on 1/30/20 at 9:56 am to LNCHBOX
Discussion of cohabitation prior to marriage
Something like that is very difficult to "study," due to the highly subjective nature of what constitutes a "good" or "bad" marriage, and even what the criteria of "cohabitation" should be... but I know it to be true, both anecdotally and psychologically.
It's a causality vs. causation thing... hard to tie many diverse points of data together to definitively point to a single explanation.
Something like that is very difficult to "study," due to the highly subjective nature of what constitutes a "good" or "bad" marriage, and even what the criteria of "cohabitation" should be... but I know it to be true, both anecdotally and psychologically.
It's a causality vs. causation thing... hard to tie many diverse points of data together to definitively point to a single explanation.
Posted on 1/30/20 at 10:00 am to Salmon
Negative outcomes for children born out of wedlock
Links in the article to studies and government statistics.
ETA: Misunderstood the question.
Links in the article to studies and government statistics.
ETA: Misunderstood the question.
This post was edited on 1/30/20 at 10:05 am
Posted on 1/30/20 at 10:03 am to KINGCAKEZZZZ
If you move in with her, it will always be her place not yours. Doesn't matter who is paying the bills.
Posted on 1/30/20 at 10:04 am to BayBengal9
quote:
but I know it to be true, both anecdotally and psychologically.
Posted on 1/30/20 at 10:04 am to BayBengal9
quote:
Negative outcomes for children born out of wedlock
Links in the article to studies and government statistics.
Yeah again, that isn't what we are talking about here though
I'm fully aware of the negative outcomes of children born out of wedlock
quote:
It could be.
Ok. But that isn't what you said in your first post. You stated it as fact.
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