Morning Wake Up Rituals?

Piss.

Shower, browse td while brushing teeth, feed dogs, leave the house...

Alarm goes off at 4, coffee and toast with peanut butter, read a combo of BR news, Houston News, and TD, massive shite, shower, brush my teeth, dress. Out the door by 5.

The first thing I do is take a shite, which I’m doing now.

Next, I will take a shower where I typically cash my own paycheck.

After my shower, I catch up on world events here.

30 minutes into the world events, I will take another shite then proceed with daily activities.

-Alarm off at 6:30am
-if my wife and I were arguing about something the night before, I gotta hear it again possibly
-eat breakfast, watch the news, look at TD
-shave, brush teeth, get dressed
-out the door at 7:00am and walk to the subway station

quote:

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Cinnamon Toast Crunch

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congrats on being obese

on work days:
wake up at 3:45
make coffee
try to hold in a dump while waiting on coffee to brew
read td on the toilet for 10 minutes, brush teeth and shower
walk dog
leave for work at 430, listen to podcast on the way
eat breakfast at work

on weekend:
wake up whenever
brew coffee
dump
go fish/hunt

I don't use an alarm.

I have not needed one for years. I wake up well before my daily engagements.

Yeah, it’s like this:

I woke up this morning dick rock hard
Had to piss so bad, that shite made me say Good Lord!
Dick harder than a armadillo
So I went in the bathroom and drained the lil' fellow
Flush the toilet, washed my hands
Took off my silk shirt, and silk pajama pants
I was about to meet this bitch in bout an hour
Brushed my, washed my face, get the soap, grab and towel and jumped my stankin' arse in the shower
Now I'm feelin' better, at least i'm smellin' better
Instead of a combination of pussy and cheddar
I still smelled like last night's frick
So washed my lips, fingertips, but I can't forget about under the nuts
Blow my nose, wash my toes, then my a-hole
Foggin up the mirrors, and wettin' up all my frickin clothes
Ain't that a bitch?! I'm already running late
Now I gotta change my outfit
Stepped to the closet and scanned the wardrobe
Seen that silk shirt, Tommy, frick it, i'll wear that Polo though
Girbauds and Polo socks
Slipped on them Fila's cause it was too hot to bust the Timbo high tops
I looked in the mirror one last time for kicks
Like I really had to check, like I ain't know I was the shite
Everything was in place
Pearly whites, brown complextion, daily braids and that baby face
Mirror, mirror, wasup, who's the most stuck up
I bet it's that bitch I just fricked that stankin slut
Thats the thought for the day
I'm bouts to cut that ho off ‘cause she can't frick anyways
Now i'm back on my mission
But before I hit the frickin front door, gots to hit the kitchen
Cause hunger pains are gettin bigger
Man, I ain't ate shite yet
Dawg, hungrier than three n****s
Grits and oatmeal, no time to cook though
frick it i'll grab that left-over cold cut combo
And now the stomach's at ease
I'm bout the jet, but first grab the beeper, the ring, the wallet, and keys
And now i'm ready for the street
Lookin neat, smellin sweet from my teeth to my frickin feet
I guees it's part of my job
Being colder then cold, smoother then smooth, shiver then shive

shite, shower, shave, brush teeth, coffee, and dip of Copenhagen on my drive in to the office.