re: Married folks — do you and your spouse keep separate checking accounts?

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That kind of proves why a joint account is necessary though. If both of you are supposed to be saving 10% for retirement, but someone is shoveling $20k a year to their family to cover bills a year, that's going to result in kildozer type stuff. Everyone needs to know. Full transparency is honesty. Anything over $200 needs to be discussed first. No $2k weekends in Nashville with the women, or fishing with the other baws without talking about it first. Ain't hard.

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It’s not a big deal if you have enough money. My wife and I would divorce if we had to talk about $200. I bought a breitling a few weeks ago when I took my omega in for service. No talks just bought it.

She ripped my arse and guess what I’ll be being her one for Christmas now

We talk about our finances but we send what we want.

No. Combined when engaged and never looked back.

I know it works for some to separate but it’s odd to me.

I see it more from folks who waited a long time to marry.

Same checking acct but separate credit cards.

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It’s not a big deal if you have enough money. My wife and I would divorce if we had to talk about $200.

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So why bother sending each other money via Zelle for bills or household improvements? You send each other money for generator installs, but you spend $10k on a watch. That's State Farm agent money, congrats.

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woman was worthy of my trust

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Trust is not an excuse to not pay attention.

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I blame her for putting up with it as this isn’t 1950. Nobody should put up with a spouse who doesn’t treats them as equal. Leave his fat insecure arse and see how he responds

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She just deals with it. She’s not the sharpest tool in the shed, she went to junior college for one semester and failed out. Having a big house and posting all these bullshite “ look at me and our fancy stuff” pictures on social media is more important than her living alone and having a job making minimum wage.

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So how does she make money to put in her account?

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Makes expensive cookies and sells them on FB and at craft shows

With my first wife, no. Ended badly. With my 2nd wife, we didn't share anything. Different banks, different cell phone companies, different insurance companies, etc. On paper we were completely separate financial entities. When she was about to go on hospice care I had her go to the bank with her parents and put them on all of her accounts. I have no idea how much was in her accounts when she passed. That money belonged to her kids anyway per our prenuptial. We were only married for 6 years before she passed, but not once was there ever a disagreement over money.

Wish I had. My ex was extremely controlling. She once found out that I had a 5 dollar bill in my wallet and proceeded to get me to buy her a drink with it.

I tried explaining to her that I wanted cash so I could buy her birthday/anniversary gifts without her knowing. She said that I could use the credit card. It was difficult trying to buy gifts before the next cycle started and she 'found out' about the gift I bought because I was like two days early and we got into a fight over 'using the credit card'.

Once I told her that the purchase was a birthday gift for her and that I would no longer buy her any gifts for any occasion she then wanted to get me my own account. It was to late.

We have a fixed portion decided annually that goes straight out of our paycheck every month to a joint account to pay for home, kid, grocery, brokerage, vacation, etc. The remaining we keep in personal accounts for whatever we want to blow it on. If I get a raise that’s more for my personal account. Same for her. Incentivizes both of us.