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Started By
Message
GMT
Posted on 1/13/23 at 4:04 am
Posted on 1/13/23 at 4:04 am
Morning all
JOTD
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet.
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$1500!" she cried, "$1500 just to tell me my duck is dead!"
The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $50, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $1500."
JOTD
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet.
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$1500!" she cried, "$1500 just to tell me my duck is dead!"
The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $50, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $1500."
This post was edited on 1/13/23 at 7:15 am
Posted on 1/13/23 at 4:43 am to dyslexiateechur
Morning all,
Just took the pups out, twice.
Just took the pups out, twice.
Posted on 1/13/23 at 5:17 am to LSUDad
quote:
LSUDad
Been a long time. Welcome back.
Posted on 1/13/23 at 5:18 am to dyslexiateechur
Birthday today, getting old !
Posted on 1/13/23 at 5:28 am to dyslexiateechur
Morning, Teech. Morning, all.
Posted on 1/13/23 at 5:52 am to jeffsdad
Good morning.
Its Friday the 13th which means a busy day of murder for me.
Its Friday the 13th which means a busy day of murder for me.
Posted on 1/13/23 at 5:54 am to dyslexiateechur
Good Morning Humans
TGIF
All clear heading into the wild card weekend.
Gonna be a great one albeit a frogs hair on the chilly side. Maybe time to take down the Xmas stuff. IDK.
Well whatever y’all got planned, make it special by doing something you won’t forget, in style.
TGIF
All clear heading into the wild card weekend.
Gonna be a great one albeit a frogs hair on the chilly side. Maybe time to take down the Xmas stuff. IDK.
Well whatever y’all got planned, make it special by doing something you won’t forget, in style.
Posted on 1/13/23 at 5:59 am to Bullfrog
quote:
Maybe time to take down the Xmas stuff. IDK.
I just booked Bork to come take ours down. He’s so efficient with that chainsaw. And whatever, we can buy new walls.
Posted on 1/13/23 at 6:01 am to Slagathor
Smart.
I wonder if is the voice behind the Waze yat?
I wonder if is the voice behind the Waze yat?
Posted on 1/13/23 at 6:02 am to Slagathor
quote:
I just booked Bork to come take ours down
It was my pleasure.
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