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G.I. Joe To Be Replaced With Genderless G.I. Pat
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:29 am
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:29 am
quote:
G.I. Joe To Be Replaced With Genderless G.I. Pat
[/url]
Link to Bee Article
Hasbro announced today the replacement of its popular G.I. Joe action figure with an updated version that's much more fitting in the current year: G.I. Pat, a genderless take on the action hero.
quote:
After public outcry over the extremely masculine G.I. Joe, Hasbro finally caved and agreed to remove the super-macho action hero from store shelves.
"Now you know your gender identity -- and knowing is half the battle!" shouts an actor playing G.I. Pat in a commercial for the new toy as he struggles to light a Molotov cocktail and picks up a brick with the utmost effort. "Now let's go murder some cops!"
G.I. Pat comes with a Molotov cocktail, a brick, and a cute miniature copy of The Communist Manifesto. You can accessorize your G.I. Pat with genderless clothes, androgynous accessories, and fun equipment like smartphones that just play asinine TikTok videos and social justice lectures all day for your miniature action hero.
Conservatives immediately complained on social media, screaming that losing G.I. Joe would signal the end of the Republic. Hasbro then flip-flopped, caving to conservatives and announcing G.I. Joe would be made even more masculine under the new brand "MISTER HE-MAN G.I. JOE MURDER YOUR FACE ARMY MAN."
Full article at link.
9
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:30 am to goofball
Writing for the Bee seems like an awesome job
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:31 am to JetsetNuggs
"A real non-nationality specific person"
This post was edited on 2/26/21 at 9:32 am
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:31 am to JetsetNuggs
Ya, until your week's worth of work is ruined by the next woke proggy policy that comes out.
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:32 am to goofball
This is rich. Liberals are so fricking dumb.
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:35 am to JetsetNuggs
quote:
Writing for the Bee seems like an awesome job
It's the uncle that tells you to pull his finger of parody sites.
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:36 am to JetsetNuggs
quote:
Writing for the Bee seems like an awesome job
They are certainly handed plenty of material to work with. That's for sure.
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:36 am to goofball
This post was edited on 2/26/21 at 9:37 am
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:36 am to Fewer Kilometers
quote:
It's the uncle that tells you to pull his finger of parody sites.
If you appreciate humor, it's all you have left. PC culture has ruined everything else, and will eventually take down the Bee.
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:41 am to Centinel
quote:
Ya, until your week's worth of work is ruined by the next woke proggy policy that comes out.
Exactly.
Imaging trying to constantly produce fresh material on a satire site only to continuously be thwarted by reality. shite, you have to write material that is more and more absurd just so people can clearly see it is satire. Then, when you think you've hit that level proggies come out and celebrate the "victory" of a genderless fricking potato!!!
This post was edited on 2/26/21 at 9:42 am
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:43 am to goofball
quote:
G.I. Pat comes with a Molotov cocktail, a brick, and a cute miniature copy of The Communist Manifesto. You can accessorize your G.I. Pat with genderless clothes, androgynous accessories, and fun equipment like smartphones that just play asinine TikTok videos and social justice lectures all day for your miniature action hero.
That is hilarious.
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:45 am to goofball
I can remember SNL doing something on this back in the day...Joe Piscopo referred to it as G. I Don't Know
Posted on 2/26/21 at 9:50 am to goofball
Damn man. The Bee always gets me. Thought this was real for sure
Posted on 2/26/21 at 10:16 am to goofball
SNL did this joke 30 years ago.
Posted on 2/26/21 at 10:21 am to Chicken
Posted on 2/26/21 at 10:24 am to goofball
It's going to happen in real life, cause that is what is happening now a days.
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