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Started By
Message
Do you know someone who committed suicide?
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:32 am
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:32 am
Has anyone else lost a loved one to suicide? If so, have you found peace about it? My Dad shot himself about 17 years ago.
Edit: Thank you to everyone who posted their experiences.
Edit: It's comparable to understanding the mind of your loved one's murderer and then forgiving them. It is easy to say it, but requires constant mental fortitude to truly believe.
I did not intend for this topic to become a debate on the appropriate way one should feel.
I believe that the living who grieve for them should be able to discuss perfectly natural reactions to such a personal tragedy and how it affected them, honestly, and without judgement.
Edit: Thank you to everyone who posted their experiences.
Edit: It's comparable to understanding the mind of your loved one's murderer and then forgiving them. It is easy to say it, but requires constant mental fortitude to truly believe.
I did not intend for this topic to become a debate on the appropriate way one should feel.
I believe that the living who grieve for them should be able to discuss perfectly natural reactions to such a personal tragedy and how it affected them, honestly, and without judgement.
This post was edited on 4/8/17 at 3:56 pm
87
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:33 am to OKellsBells
No.
It is the most selfish thing a human can do.
It is the most selfish thing a human can do.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:35 am to Kcrad
I agree.
Edited to clarify why I agree: Each survivor's "understanding" of what went on in another person's tortured mind is unique and complex. If someone has the opinion that to kill oneself is a selfish act, I can understand why one would feel that way.
Some survivors may actually consider it "selfish" to avoid thinking of a violent act as their loved one's intention to permanently inflict pain on those left behind. Just my opinion.
I think for my dad it was a desperate, selfish, yet brave moment. Selfish in the sense that he did not do it to hurt US, but rather to end his own suffering.
The argument of whether or not it is selfish is less important to those left behind than understanding who is ultimately responsible for the suicide. Many survivors blame themselves.
Edited to clarify why I agree: Each survivor's "understanding" of what went on in another person's tortured mind is unique and complex. If someone has the opinion that to kill oneself is a selfish act, I can understand why one would feel that way.
Some survivors may actually consider it "selfish" to avoid thinking of a violent act as their loved one's intention to permanently inflict pain on those left behind. Just my opinion.
I think for my dad it was a desperate, selfish, yet brave moment. Selfish in the sense that he did not do it to hurt US, but rather to end his own suffering.
The argument of whether or not it is selfish is less important to those left behind than understanding who is ultimately responsible for the suicide. Many survivors blame themselves.
This post was edited on 4/8/17 at 1:12 pm
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:35 am to OKellsBells
talk to a psycologist OP. It's worth it.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:35 am to Kcrad
quote:
It is the most selfish thing a human can do.
Agree to disagree. But yeah I've lost a pretty good friend to it. Sucks, doesn't get better, and always think about how it could have been different.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:36 am to OKellsBells
first guitar player, who was also the first friend I had met, on the first day at a new school in 3rd grade.
Died in 2007
Died in 2007
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:37 am to OKellsBells
My mom shot herself in September 2001. I don't think I'm at peace with it and it still saddens me to think about but I also don't wallow in denial or pity. I just kinda moved on.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:39 am to Kcrad
quote:
It is the most selfish thing a human can do.
It's always people that know nothing about it that say this.
This post was edited on 4/8/17 at 12:40 am
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:40 am to Meatflap
Damn. That has to be rough to deal with. Was it out completely out of the blue? I can't imagine that kind of mind frick
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:45 am to OKellsBells
quote:
My Dad shot himself about 17 years ago.
Sorry OP.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:45 am to habanos
quote:
talk to a psycologist OP. It's worth it.
Thanks, I'm okay now. I am just curious about other people's experiences.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:46 am to OKellsBells
One of my buddies from high school did last year.
I went to the Bears-Vikings game with him after 9/11. Poor kid stuttered, but had a great laugh.
The stuttering haunted him and his dickbag brother and father ridiculed him, so he hung himself in his parents' backyard. He was a really good guy, too.
I went to the Bears-Vikings game with him after 9/11. Poor kid stuttered, but had a great laugh.
The stuttering haunted him and his dickbag brother and father ridiculed him, so he hung himself in his parents' backyard. He was a really good guy, too.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:48 am to Meatflap
quote:
Meatflap
Me too.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:50 am to OKellsBells
Yep
Nope
Nope
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:51 am to OKellsBells
Very very sad thing.
We've got to improve our entire societal attitude toward mental illness and treatment.
For the survivors/loved ones, a strive toward peace and acceptance of the act as the result of a troubled mind and not something encompassing them or systemic or hereditary.
We've got to improve our entire societal attitude toward mental illness and treatment.
For the survivors/loved ones, a strive toward peace and acceptance of the act as the result of a troubled mind and not something encompassing them or systemic or hereditary.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:52 am to nvasil1
quote:
The stuttering haunted him and his dickbag brother and father ridiculed him, so he hung himself in his parents' backyard. He was a really good guy, too.
The brother is one thing, but his own father? You would imagine that he deeply regrets his actions, but he pretty much did the opposite of a father's first duty... To protect his children.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:54 am to OKellsBells
quote:My condolences.
My Dad shot himself about 17 years ago.
My sister-in-law lost her father to suicide; though I think she was very young when it happened. I know her mother had trouble with it at her wedding... so I don't guess it ever really goes away.
I've never lost anyone close to me, but now that I'm thinking about it - my dad lost a good colleague, I lost a cousin, two guys in my high school class I've learned about, and an ex of mine had lost a brother to it.
So, yeah, it happens way more than one would think.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 12:55 am to Kcrad
quote:
No.
It is the most selfish thing a human can do.
This is the stupidest repeated fricking answer on the OT.
Most people who commit suicide aren't thinking rationally. They are depressed or suffering from another mental illness
Posted on 4/8/17 at 1:01 am to OKellsBells
I had a childhood friend who did during Christmas break of our freshman year in high school after his girlfriend broke up with him.
Posted on 4/8/17 at 1:01 am to USMCTiger03
quote:
We've got to improve our entire societal attitude toward mental illness and treatment. For the survivors/loved ones, a strive toward peace and acceptance of the act as the result of a troubled mind and not something encompassing them or systemic or hereditary.
So true.
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