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British woman in Tenerife found with turtle in vagina after night out partying

Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:46 am
Posted by RedRifle
Austin/NO
Member since Dec 2013
8335 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:46 am
LINK


quote:

An emergency room doctor in a hospital in Mojón de Arona, in the south of the Canary Island of Tenerife, could not believe what he was seeing when, on Saturday, he attended to a British woman who was complaining of strong pains in her genital area. When the doctor examined her, a foreign object was found in her vagina: a dead Chinese pond turtle (Chinemys reevesii). Given the bizarre nature of the situation, the doctor called the police, who took a statement from the 26-year-old. She explained that she had gone out partying in the area of Fañabé beach, but could not recall what had happened that night. Sources close to the case have told EL PAÍS that the main theory is that the reptile was inserted into the woman’s vagina either by herself or by someone else, given that it is impossible that it could have ended up inside her body any other way.


quote:

An analysis of the dead turtle revealed that it is a freshwater species usually sold in pet shops. The specimen found inside the woman’s body was a baby, but they can grow up to 18 centimeters in length once mature.
This post was edited on 9/21/18 at 11:48 am
Posted by Parade Grounds
BR,LA
Member since Jun 2017
867 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:46 am to
not clicking that blind link
Posted by beerJeep
Louisiana
Member since Nov 2016
39227 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:47 am to
She had a snapper in her snapper?
Posted by LSUGrad9295
Baton Rouge
Member since May 2007
38317 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:47 am to
quote:

not clicking that blind link at work
Posted by LSUGrad9295
Baton Rouge
Member since May 2007
38317 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:48 am to
quote:

She had a snapper in her snapper?



Or maybe a tortoise in the hair?
Posted by UGATiger26
Jacksonville, FL
Member since Dec 2009
9128 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:49 am to
Someone gave her the shell-shocker

This post was edited on 9/21/18 at 11:53 am
Posted by The Torch
DFW The Dub
Member since Aug 2014
30433 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:49 am to
So there was a turtle in her snapper ?
Posted by beerJeep
Louisiana
Member since Nov 2016
39227 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:50 am to
So many puns available here
Posted by el Gaucho
He/They
Member since Dec 2010
60114 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:51 am to
Did the husband get a paternity test?
Posted by TheAlmightySmash
New Orleans
Member since Jun 2014
5493 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:52 am to
quote:

She had a snapper in her snapper?


Posted by Athis
I AM Charlie Kirk....
Member since Aug 2016
16905 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:52 am to
So much for the shy turtle theory...
Posted by Cheese Grits
Wherever I lay my hat is my home
Member since Apr 2012
63090 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:53 am to
At first I thought this.....



But then read it was a woman and Mitch has not been in a pussy since the pussy had him.
Posted by WestCoastAg
Member since Oct 2012
151016 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:53 am to
quote:

She had a snapper in her snapper?

Posted by MoarKilometers
Member since Apr 2015
21402 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:53 am to
quote:

She had a snapper in her snapper?

box turtle...
Posted by DawgGONIT
Member since May 2015
2961 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:53 am to
Why call the police for this shite? Did the police chief have some turtle kink?
Posted by Righteous Dude
Member since Oct 2017
1556 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:54 am to
Posted by Boudreaux35
BR
Member since Sep 2007
22281 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:58 am to
Never gonna get that smell out.
Posted by LSUGrad9295
Baton Rouge
Member since May 2007
38317 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 11:59 am to
quote:

Why call the police for this shite? Did the police chief have some turtle kink?



I feel the "Scooby-Doo That's My Fetish" meme will soon make an appearance...
Posted by SCLibertarian
Conway, South Carolina
Member since Aug 2013
42665 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 12:00 pm to
quote:

Never gonna get that smell out.

She's British. It may be an improvement.
Posted by LSUJuice
Back in Houston
Member since Apr 2004
18053 posts
Posted on 9/21/18 at 12:01 pm to
She was always so shy. At least she finally came out of her shell.
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