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re: About to turn 40. Haven't had sex in 10 years. AMA.

Posted on 9/25/25 at 8:05 am to
Posted by White Bear
OPINIONS & A-HOLES
Member since Jul 2014
17271 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 8:05 am to
quote:

Successful marriages only occur when both the husbsnd and wife are happy and fulfilled.
You read this in Cosmo?
Posted by UpToPar
Baton Rouge
Member since Sep 2008
22872 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 8:17 am to
quote:

I made a promise to her, and she to me


Except she isn't holding her promise. You are presumably providing for her and satisfying her needs. She's not reciprocating. This is a problem.
Posted by southpawcock
Member since Oct 2015
17078 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 8:38 am to
quote:


Told the wife about this thread with men saying they hadn’t had sex with their wife in years, her comment “not even a blow job?”

God bless that woman. Shes a keeper.


Great post, but could be better with pics of wife.
Posted by Impotent Waffle
Baton Rouge
Member since Sep 2007
10108 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 9:41 am to
Lort….

I feel for some of yall….

I get it with kids, life, jobs etc shite can get in the way at times. Years of sexless marriage though….. that’s wild.

Is there no intimacy of any kind as well?

That would drive me crazy
Posted by sqerty
AP
Member since May 2022
8147 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 10:18 am to

They usually cook good food too
Posted by baytiger11
Member since Jul 2020
2280 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 10:20 am to
I really don’t get it. I could see if my wife got injured or paralyzed or something, yea I’d stay by her side and find a way to cope.
But for her to be physically able and just always “not in the mood”? Yea that’s not going to work..

I noticed a dip in sex at one point in our marriage, and saw a post here about how the couple always has sex before an outing or dinner, not after. I thought that was simple, but solid advice.

I gotta say, It’s a lot more enjoyable not having sex on a full stomach or having to “end the night perfectly” with sex. Or expect the night to end in sex… Just do it first then go enjoy the rest of your night or afternoon.
When my wife walks in from work now, we know what’s up, lol not after dinner or baths.

Also once we stopped trying for a kid that took a lot of pressure off both of us, and the intimacy shot up.

But 10 years without sex is settling for unhappiness. Unless the guy is dedicating his life to being a priest or a monk, he’s torturing himself and his natural male biology.
Posted by Impotent Waffle
Baton Rouge
Member since Sep 2007
10108 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 10:24 am to
Wife and I go through spells, we got kids, their schedules are busy and our schedules are busy. So I get all that.

And yes, obviously medical conditions, injuries etc are a completely different story.

I can’t wrap my head around having zero intimacy with your partner for years. Truly mindblowing.

I would try counseling hard and if we could not work it out, then we couldn’t work it out. Let’s be friends then..
Posted by baytiger11
Member since Jul 2020
2280 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 10:37 am to
Agreed. Once you’re living like basically just roommates, (really before it gets to that point) it’s time to step back and re-evaluate everything…seek counseling if they need to. If that doesn’t work, no need to stick around.
Posted by N2cars
Close by
Member since Feb 2008
38006 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 11:07 am to
Life experience.


Posted by HattiesburgTiger5439
Hattiesburg ms
Member since Sep 2023
993 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 11:14 am to
Then whats up? Do you not try to? Do you have girlfriend that just stop fuxking you?
If not stay single and go buy you a bad bitch to let ya do whatever you want to within reason. Boom!! Got your nut and now you can go llay your games again or whatevrr
Posted by HattiesburgTiger5439
Hattiesburg ms
Member since Sep 2023
993 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 11:20 am to
This doesnt matter as much as you think buddy. Make a woman laugh and smile your in of you have any game at all. Theres always someone.for everyone if you want that. Get out of the house and go places, if you sit at home and wtch TV or play games well then not many real women will frick with someone like that. They may for.awhile but most women want a man that does man shite!! Not kid shite! They want to.be important and noticed and games frick that up. I promise you if anyone is gaming and its a problem and it gets ignored your wofe or girl with get noticed or fricked by someone. Thats a fact. How long and when it happens depends on the situation. But a woman wants attention, they wajt to laugh, and they want to be heard
Posted by Odysseus32
Member since Dec 2009
9804 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 11:31 am to
quote:

Yes, I’ve known women who just don’t like sex for whatever reason. They wouldn’t be married to me very long though. You don’t want to have sex you are telling me you no longer want to be married to me. Simple


Or you've let yourself go?

Not saying you personally. I don't know your situation.

But I've met men in this state that are obviously sexually frustrated and they look like garbage bag, aren't well groomed, and are generally gross.

Just because you get married doesn't mean you get to shite the bed in the looks department.
Posted by Big Fat Guy
Member since Nov 2020
1112 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 11:47 am to
Don't sweat it, man, sex is overrated. A good cheeseburger is better than sex.

Has a cheeseburger ever nagged you?

Has a cheeseburger ever listened to a demo and then bought a $3,000 dollar vacuum cleaner?

Has a cheeseburger ever cut your Slauson off for getting caught with another cheeseburger?

Cheeseburger is undefeated.
Posted by southpawcock
Member since Oct 2015
17078 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 12:10 pm to
quote:

Cheeseburger is undefeated.



Username checks out.
Posted by DCtiger1
Member since Jul 2009
11169 posts
Posted on 9/25/25 at 1:35 pm to
When you’re out of breath taking your clothes off, I can see why you think a cheeseburger is better
Posted by UASports23
Basketball School
Member since Nov 2009
26121 posts
Posted on 9/27/25 at 7:14 am to
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