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re: Do you have a favorite Rodney Dangerfield quote?

Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:07 pm to
Posted by SportsGuyNOLA
New Orleans, LA
Member since May 2014
17317 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:07 pm to
My all-time fave....

I told my doctor I thought my wife had VD.

He gave HIMSELF a shot of penicillin.

No respect!
Posted by LucasP
Member since Apr 2012
21618 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:07 pm to
Paraphrasing:

Me and the wife are quitting smoking so we said only after sex. I'm down to one a year, she smokes a pack a week.
Posted by Jax-Tiger
Port Saint Lucie, FL
Member since Jan 2005
24926 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:20 pm to
My wife is so fat. One time I ran into her with the car. She said, why didn't you go around me? I said I didn't think I had enough gas.
Posted by MaroonWhite
48 61 69 6c 20 53 74 61 74 65 21
Member since Oct 2012
3698 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:36 pm to
"I was so ugly the dog would close his eyes before humping my leg."
Posted by FightinTigersDammit
Louisiana North
Member since Mar 2006
35104 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:38 pm to
I tell ya, I didn't know nuthin about sex growing up. By the time I was 18, I had sex once and VD twice!

Posted by ELESHU23
Kingwood, TX
Member since Jul 2008
84 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:44 pm to
My wife told me she wanted to make love in the back seat.

She made me drive.
Posted by crazycubes
Member since Jan 2016
5256 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:46 pm to
"Man, I had to wear my cousin's hand-me-downs ; and she wasn't even my size!"
Posted by DWaginHTown
Houston, TX
Member since Jan 2006
9899 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 9:49 pm to
Thornton Melon: What's your favorite subject?

Bubbles: Poetry.

Thornton Melon: Really? Well, maybe you can help me straighten out my Longfellow.
Posted by Chum Bucket
West Palm Beach
Member since Oct 2011
977 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 10:00 pm to
I wish my son's room was as clean as his pot.
Posted by MMauler
Member since Jun 2013
19216 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 10:33 pm to
I found out that this guy was sleeping with my wife so I decided to confront him.

I said, "Hey buddy, who told you that you could sleep with my wife?"

He said, "EVERYBODY!!!"
This post was edited on 5/11/17 at 10:35 pm
Posted by Popths
Baton Rouge
Member since Aug 2016
4001 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 11:25 pm to
Some people ask, are you a legs man, are you a breast man, are you an arse man. I must be an arse man. I was walking down the street and a guy hollers out to me "you're an arse man".
Posted by Popths
Baton Rouge
Member since Aug 2016
4001 posts
Posted on 5/11/17 at 11:26 pm to
Seriously, last year, I visited his grave. His epitaph reads "There goes the neighborhood".
Posted by tigersownall
Thibodaux
Member since Sep 2011
15402 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 12:17 am to
Buy a hat like this you get a free bowl of soup.

Call me when you got no class.

Easy money has a shite load of good quotes. Not one of his best known movies.
Posted by Konkey Dong
Member since Aug 2013
2170 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 3:25 am to
Posted by lsuson
Metairie
Member since Oct 2013
12343 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 7:40 am to
"Hey everyone, the mayor of New Orleans is a bitch!"
Posted by 610man
Louisiana
Member since Jun 2005
7413 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 8:20 am to
My wife likes to smoke after sex, I've had the same pack for months, she smokes 3 packs a day.

I told my son one day you will have kids of your own, he said so will you.

My daughter has been picked up so much, she started to grow handles.
Posted by 610man
Louisiana
Member since Jun 2005
7413 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 8:27 am to
My doctor has been busy lately, he said recently he's had 6 cases of VD, but he's alright now.

One time this girl told me to come over no one's home, I went over, no one was home.
This post was edited on 5/12/17 at 8:29 am
Posted by lenlews
NoMiss
Member since Apr 2011
647 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 9:07 am to
"Know hOw I make my wife scream during sex?








I wipe my dick on the drapes"



Posted by jmarto1
Houma, LA/ Las Vegas, NV
Member since Mar 2008
34322 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 9:15 am to
Want to make $20 the hard way?
Posted by TigerCoon
Member since Nov 2005
19006 posts
Posted on 5/12/17 at 9:19 am to
Henny Youngman, but thanks for playing.
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