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Woman's hilarious rant after Original Source shower gel 'leaves her vagina ablaze' - and s
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:14 pm
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:14 pm
Be careful out there!
******************************
The blogger, who writes on the Facebook page 'I Know, I Need to Stop Talking' , penned a hilarious post about her all-too-invigorating showering experience, and it seems to have struck a chord with women everywhere.
After explaining her usual rose-scented gel had run out, she explained she had a new bottle of Original Source so used that instead.
Warning: Some of the language she uses might make you blush if you're easily embarrassed
She wrote: "I washed my arms and shaved underneath them. I washed my neck, breasts, stomach and back. Thus far, it had been a positively first class bathing experience.
"And then. AND THEN. Oh. Dear. God. MY VAGINA WAS ABLAZE.
"For a moment, I wasn’t entirely sure what had happened. Had I repeated the never to be forgotten error when I managed to apply hair removal cream which was strictly not for front bottoms to my front bottom? Had a stray spark inadvertently set light to my pubic thatch?
"BECAUSE IT F***ING FELT LIKE IT.
"Yes, Original Source, your innocuous looking green bottle of so called shower gel, it turns out, is an absolute f***ing liability.
"MY FLAPS WERE ON F***ING FIRE. I had a quick look at the ingredients list to see if it contained gasoline. It did not.
"There was a warning though. ‘KEEP AWAY FROM EYES.’ Keep away from eyes? KEEP AWAY FROM EYES? Frankly, my eyes were the least of my problems right now.
"I frantically scrubbed my flaps, which by now felt as though they were being ceremoniously scrubbed by ants wearing ice skates laced with chilli sauce. ‘7,929 tingling leaves’ claimed the front of the bottle. Tingling? TINGLING? This wasn’t tingling my minge. It was starting a f***ing bush fire down there. (Pun entirely intended. You can thank me later.)"
Men have had similar experiences (Photo: Getty Images)
For anyone worried about her welfare, she explained that 12 hours later her 'front bottom' had "calmed down" but she wanted to pen the note "in the interest of public safety".
She also suggested a new tag line for Original Source's gel, which read: '7,297 tingling leaves which will accost your genitalia until it screams for mercy'".
Catchy! Her post ended with a thank you note to the brand for livening up her morning.
She probably won't be making that mistake again.
But her post was inundated with comments from sympathetic clean people who had made the same mistake on themselves - or their children.
******************************
The blogger, who writes on the Facebook page 'I Know, I Need to Stop Talking' , penned a hilarious post about her all-too-invigorating showering experience, and it seems to have struck a chord with women everywhere.
After explaining her usual rose-scented gel had run out, she explained she had a new bottle of Original Source so used that instead.
Warning: Some of the language she uses might make you blush if you're easily embarrassed
She wrote: "I washed my arms and shaved underneath them. I washed my neck, breasts, stomach and back. Thus far, it had been a positively first class bathing experience.
"And then. AND THEN. Oh. Dear. God. MY VAGINA WAS ABLAZE.
"For a moment, I wasn’t entirely sure what had happened. Had I repeated the never to be forgotten error when I managed to apply hair removal cream which was strictly not for front bottoms to my front bottom? Had a stray spark inadvertently set light to my pubic thatch?
"BECAUSE IT F***ING FELT LIKE IT.
"Yes, Original Source, your innocuous looking green bottle of so called shower gel, it turns out, is an absolute f***ing liability.
"MY FLAPS WERE ON F***ING FIRE. I had a quick look at the ingredients list to see if it contained gasoline. It did not.
"There was a warning though. ‘KEEP AWAY FROM EYES.’ Keep away from eyes? KEEP AWAY FROM EYES? Frankly, my eyes were the least of my problems right now.
"I frantically scrubbed my flaps, which by now felt as though they were being ceremoniously scrubbed by ants wearing ice skates laced with chilli sauce. ‘7,929 tingling leaves’ claimed the front of the bottle. Tingling? TINGLING? This wasn’t tingling my minge. It was starting a f***ing bush fire down there. (Pun entirely intended. You can thank me later.)"
Men have had similar experiences (Photo: Getty Images)
For anyone worried about her welfare, she explained that 12 hours later her 'front bottom' had "calmed down" but she wanted to pen the note "in the interest of public safety".
She also suggested a new tag line for Original Source's gel, which read: '7,297 tingling leaves which will accost your genitalia until it screams for mercy'".
Catchy! Her post ended with a thank you note to the brand for livening up her morning.
She probably won't be making that mistake again.
But her post was inundated with comments from sympathetic clean people who had made the same mistake on themselves - or their children.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:15 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
quote:
Woman's hilarious rant
Stopped right there.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:16 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
quote:
MY FLAPS WERE ON F***ING FIRE
And that's when I decided IWNHI.
I don't do flaps.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:16 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
quote:
my front bottom
The frick?
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:18 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
Love the use of flaps...
Speaking of front bottom, had some buddies that used to call their house in college the Front Butt Hut. Always got a chuckle out of that.
Speaking of front bottom, had some buddies that used to call their house in college the Front Butt Hut. Always got a chuckle out of that.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:19 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
quote:
She wrote: "I washed my arms and shaved underneath them. I washed my neck, breasts, stomach and back. Thus far, it had been a positively first class bathing experience.
Eww, why does she grow armpit hair? I've never seen a woman with pit hair before
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:22 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
My Flaps
Nasty Old ho do some exercises
Nasty Old ho do some exercises
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:23 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
This lady sounds nasty.
"Flaps"
"Front bottom"
"pubic thatch"
"minge"
"bush fire"
"Flaps"
"Front bottom"
"pubic thatch"
"minge"
"bush fire"
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:24 pm to monkeybutt
Yeah, that's what she told her husband.
Blaming it on the friggin soap... ,She got the clap from some strange...
Blaming it on the friggin soap... ,She got the clap from some strange...
This post was edited on 5/11/17 at 2:26 pm
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:25 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37

This post was edited on 5/11/17 at 2:30 pm
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:33 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
She stole the term "front bottom" from Gordon Keith of the Ticket in Dallas.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 2:43 pm to VinegarStrokes
Looking at that mouth, I think she was talking about the wrong lips...
But hell, ,.IWHI
But hell, ,.IWHI
This post was edited on 5/11/17 at 2:46 pm
Posted on 5/11/17 at 3:20 pm to 20 CO TIGAH 37
Well that's a new addition to the vagina monologues.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 3:22 pm to firstandtiger
quote:
She stole the term "front bottom" from Gordon Keith of the Ticket in Dallas.
I have heard front bottom since high school. I seriously doubt whoever you just mentioned in whatever that is made it up.
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