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Posted on 5/29/14 at 4:54 pm to K E V 8 4
Posted on 5/29/14 at 5:17 pm to K E V 8 4
Jim Carrey in Liar Liar when he goes to pick up his car that has a scratch on it.
quote:
Fletcher: You scratched my car!
Impound Guy: Where?
Fletcher: [showing him] Right there!
Impound Guy: Oh. That was already there.
Fletcher: You... you liar! You know what I'm going to do about this?
Impound Guy: What?
Fletcher: Nothing! Because if I take it to small claims court, it will just drain eight hours out of my life and you probably won't show up, and even if I got the judgment you'd just stiff me anyway. So what I'm gonna do is piss and moan like an impotent jerk and then bend over and take it up the tailpipe!
Impound Guy: You've been here before, haven't ya?
Posted on 5/29/14 at 5:43 pm to SouljaBreauxTellEm
Posted on 5/29/14 at 6:17 pm to cjared036
Man there are some great ones here. For something that hasn't been mentioned yet, Nicholson in As Good As it Gets when the lady asks him how he writes women so well.
Posted on 5/29/14 at 6:19 pm to cjared036
quote:Horrible movie, but great rant.
Denis Leary in Demolition Man
Posted on 5/29/14 at 6:25 pm to MrFreakinMiyagi
quote:
Coffee is for closers
came here for this
1st place a car
2nd place a set of steak knives
3rd place you're fired, you are outta here
Posted on 5/29/14 at 6:26 pm to BluegrassBelle
quote:
By definition, I'd consider Kevin Costner's "speech" a rant in Bull Durham so I'm throwing it out there. quote:Crash Davis: After 12 years in the minor leagues, I don't try out. Besides, uh, I don't believe in quantum physics when it comes to matters of the heart. Annie Savoy: What do you believe in, then? Crash Davis: Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.
oh my
Posted on 5/29/14 at 6:30 pm to putt23
UHF has some great ones
RJ Fletcher festering bowl of dog snot rant
Stanley Spadowski life is like a mop speech
RJ Fletcher festering bowl of dog snot rant
Stanley Spadowski life is like a mop speech
Posted on 5/31/14 at 1:42 am to Brosef Stalin
Daniel Day Lewis in In The Name Of The Father. Him and his father have been wrongly accused of a bombing and see each other for the first time since everything went down.
LINK
"And I ran out, and I hid, and I wrote your name on the ground...
your stupid Giuseppe fricking name...
I wrote it in the dirt, and I fricking pissed on it!
I pissed on it...
because I did foul the ball.
What did it matter? We won. For once in our lives, we won.
You ruined that medal for me! I took it to the pawn, and they laughed at me.
They wouldn't give me 50 pence for it.
This is shock.
And that's when I started to rob, to prove that I was no good.
Delayed shock.
Never mind delayed shock.
I've been like this since I was seven.
I remember Mammy said to me, "Don't upset Giuseppe. He's not well. "
LINK
"And I ran out, and I hid, and I wrote your name on the ground...
your stupid Giuseppe fricking name...
I wrote it in the dirt, and I fricking pissed on it!
I pissed on it...
because I did foul the ball.
What did it matter? We won. For once in our lives, we won.
You ruined that medal for me! I took it to the pawn, and they laughed at me.
They wouldn't give me 50 pence for it.
This is shock.
And that's when I started to rob, to prove that I was no good.
Delayed shock.
Never mind delayed shock.
I've been like this since I was seven.
I remember Mammy said to me, "Don't upset Giuseppe. He's not well. "
This post was edited on 5/31/14 at 1:54 am
Posted on 5/31/14 at 5:16 am to abellsujr
Bullet tooth tony
So, you're obviously the big dick. And there on either side of you are your balls. There are two types of balls. There are big, brave balls, and there are little, mincy **** balls. You dicks have driving clarity of vision. But they're not clever; they smell pussy, and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good ol' pussy, and have brought your two little, mincey, **** balls along for a good ol' time. But you've got your parties muddled up. There's no pussy here- just a dose that will make you wish you were born a women. Like a prick, you're having second thoughts. You're shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with ya. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written on the side of your guns. And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle .50" written on the side of mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now frick off!
So, you're obviously the big dick. And there on either side of you are your balls. There are two types of balls. There are big, brave balls, and there are little, mincy **** balls. You dicks have driving clarity of vision. But they're not clever; they smell pussy, and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good ol' pussy, and have brought your two little, mincey, **** balls along for a good ol' time. But you've got your parties muddled up. There's no pussy here- just a dose that will make you wish you were born a women. Like a prick, you're having second thoughts. You're shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with ya. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written on the side of your guns. And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle .50" written on the side of mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now frick off!
This post was edited on 5/31/14 at 5:22 am
Posted on 5/31/14 at 5:22 am to OhFace55
quote:Nice.
Bullet-Tooth Tony, Snatch
Posted on 5/31/14 at 6:18 am to K E V 8 4
quote:
2. Scent of a Woman - Pacino's "speech" at end
This should always be #1
Posted on 5/31/14 at 8:49 am to K E V 8 4
Vince Vaughn Old School- Ear Muffs rant
Posted on 5/31/14 at 11:57 am to secondandshort
Johnny Quid - Rock N Rolla
All you need to know about life is retained in those four walls.You will notice that one of your personalities is seduced by the illusions of grandeur - the gold packet of king size with a regal insignia, an attractive implication towards grandeur and wealth, the subtle suggestion that cigarettes are indeed your royal and loyal friends, and that, Pete, is a lie. Your other personality is trying to draw your attention to the flip side of the discussion, written in boring bold black and white, it's a statement that these neat little soldiers of death and in fact trying to kill you and that, Pete, is the truth. Oh, beauty is a beguiling call to death and i'm addicted to the sweet pitch of its siren. That that starts sweet ends bitter, and that which starts bitter ends sweet.That is why you and i love the drugs and that is also why I cannot give that painting back. now please, pass me a light (or lie).
All you need to know about life is retained in those four walls.You will notice that one of your personalities is seduced by the illusions of grandeur - the gold packet of king size with a regal insignia, an attractive implication towards grandeur and wealth, the subtle suggestion that cigarettes are indeed your royal and loyal friends, and that, Pete, is a lie. Your other personality is trying to draw your attention to the flip side of the discussion, written in boring bold black and white, it's a statement that these neat little soldiers of death and in fact trying to kill you and that, Pete, is the truth. Oh, beauty is a beguiling call to death and i'm addicted to the sweet pitch of its siren. That that starts sweet ends bitter, and that which starts bitter ends sweet.That is why you and i love the drugs and that is also why I cannot give that painting back. now please, pass me a light (or lie).
Posted on 5/31/14 at 12:05 pm to OhFace55
god I love that moviePosted on 5/31/14 at 12:10 pm to wildtigercat93
How has this not been mentiomed?
You know I read a lot. Especially about things that have to do with history. I find that shite fascinating. Here is a fact, I don’t know whether you know or not, Sicilians were spawned by ****s. It’s a fact. You see, Sicilians have black blood pumpin’ through their hearts. If you don’t believe me, you can look it up. Hundreds and hundreds of years ago the Moors conquered Sicily. And the Moors are ****s. You see way back then, Sicilians were like wops from northern Italy. They all had blond hair and blue eyes. But, then the Moors moved in there, they changed the whole country. They did so much frickin’ with the Sicilian women, that they changed the whole blood-line for ever. That’s why blond hair and blue eyes became black hair and dark skin. You know, it’s absolutely amazing to think that to this day, hundreds of years later, Sicilians still carry that **** gene. No I’m quotin’ history. It’s written. Your ancestors are ****s. Your great, great, great, great, great-grandmother fricked a ****, and she had a half-**** kid. Now, if that is a fact. Tell me, am I lyin’? Cause you, you’re part eggplant.
You know I read a lot. Especially about things that have to do with history. I find that shite fascinating. Here is a fact, I don’t know whether you know or not, Sicilians were spawned by ****s. It’s a fact. You see, Sicilians have black blood pumpin’ through their hearts. If you don’t believe me, you can look it up. Hundreds and hundreds of years ago the Moors conquered Sicily. And the Moors are ****s. You see way back then, Sicilians were like wops from northern Italy. They all had blond hair and blue eyes. But, then the Moors moved in there, they changed the whole country. They did so much frickin’ with the Sicilian women, that they changed the whole blood-line for ever. That’s why blond hair and blue eyes became black hair and dark skin. You know, it’s absolutely amazing to think that to this day, hundreds of years later, Sicilians still carry that **** gene. No I’m quotin’ history. It’s written. Your ancestors are ****s. Your great, great, great, great, great-grandmother fricked a ****, and she had a half-**** kid. Now, if that is a fact. Tell me, am I lyin’? Cause you, you’re part eggplant.
Posted on 5/31/14 at 2:11 pm to K E V 8 4
The Devil's Advocate. Al Pacino as the devil talking about Eddie Barzum .
Posted on 5/31/14 at 2:26 pm to K E V 8 4
Some people seem to think that monologue=rant.
Hell, some people are even suggesting one-liners.
Hell, some people are even suggesting one-liners.
Posted on 5/31/14 at 2:41 pm to MrFreakinMiyagi
quote:
Hell, some people are even suggesting one-liners.
You can't handle the truth!
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