re: Saban and The Hat (homage to &quot;Casey at the Bat&quot; poem)

Posted by larry289

Holiday Island, AR

Member since Nov 2009

3858 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 7:25 pm to fr33manator

quote:
From the bleachers, white and crimson, there arose a piercing cry

Absolutely Pulitzer material! Suggestion for the verse above. Follow with "like a piggy over a branch", aka, "Deliverance". Second, change the ending to what happens in the dome!

Then publish!!

Posted by fr33manator

Baton Rouge

Member since Oct 2010

124664 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 7:27 pm to larry289

This is what will happen in the dome.

And I included piggy in a sty to stay with rhyme scheme.

Where would I publish this anyway? And why?

2 ...

Posted by larry289

Holiday Island, AR

Member since Nov 2009

3858 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 7:32 pm to fr33manator

Make the verse work. Why was War and Peace published...think you have created poetic art!

Posted by Todd515151

Shreveport, LA

Member since Dec 2004

714 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 7:48 pm to fr33manator

Bravo!

Posted by PsychTiger

Member since Jul 2004

99492 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 8:07 pm to fr33manator

The perfect poem to rally the 99% Unclefr33.

Posted by evil cockroach

27.98N // 86.92E

Member since Nov 2007

7519 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 8:46 pm to fr33manator

Good job!

Posted by rballa19

Lake Charles, LA

Member since Oct 2009

4380 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 9:14 pm to fr33manator

Very nice!

Posted by rballa19

Lake Charles, LA

Member since Oct 2009

4380 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 9:19 pm to fr33manator

quote:
I guess they don't include the most Famous baseball poem there is anymore in literature class

This is a shame...I'm only 24 but I really feel for the younger generations. America's youth is frickED!

Posted by fr33manator

Baton Rouge

Member since Oct 2010

124664 posts

Posted on 12/17/11 at 9:29 pm to larry289

Thank you. When the muse strikes me, she strikes hard

Posted by dbbuilder79

Overton NV

Member since Dec 2010

4166 posts

Posted on 12/18/11 at 1:19 am to fr33manator

this may deserve a sticky

Posted by fr33manator

Baton Rouge

Member since Oct 2010

124664 posts

Posted on 12/18/11 at 7:07 am to dbbuilder79

I suppose the source material is not as mainstream as I thought it was. The majority of people I sent it to weren't familiar with "Casey at the bat". Guess i'll have to use something more ingrained in the current American Psyche right now, or something similar to "twas the night before Christmas" to get traction

Posted by craignettles

Member since Jan 2005

3289 posts

Posted on 12/18/11 at 7:17 am to fr33manator

"But there is no joy in Gumpville, mighty Saban has lost out, as it sailed wide right....."

Posted by Swamp Angel

Georgia

Member since Jul 2004

7319 posts

Posted on 12/18/11 at 7:29 am to fr33manator

Very well done. Exceptional, even! It is with great joy and happiness that I offer my deepest gratitude that you have not fallen prey to the whimsical desire to put words down in the same meter as that tired, old " 'Twas the Night Before Christmas" dinosaur.

An excellent job you have done, sir.

Posted by gwilging

Virginia Beach, VA

Member since Mar 2011

1396 posts

Posted on 12/18/11 at 7:47 am to fr33manator

Epic sauce

Posted by fr33manator

Baton Rouge

Member since Oct 2010

124664 posts

Posted on 12/18/11 at 8:01 am to craignettles

quote:
Posted by craignettles "But there is no joy in Gumpville, mighty Saban has lost out, as it sailed wide right....."

Well, in my mind, it fell short of the goalposts. But that's the final thrust of the poem. It's the buildup to seemingly inevitable victory, with that "giant" of the sport, then ambiguity followed by that final stanza revealing the truth.
It is exactly as it should be

Posted by fr33manator

Baton Rouge

Member since Oct 2010

124664 posts

Posted on 12/18/11 at 8:05 am to Swamp Angel

quote:
Very well done. Exceptional, even! It is with great joy and happiness that I offer my deepest gratitude that you have not fallen prey to the whimsical desire to put words down in the same meter as that tired, old " 'Twas the Night Before Christmas" dinosaur.

Thank you. I've actually done other "twas the night before" on dIfferent subjects, only because it's immediately recognizable. But I prefer a bit of a challenge, and someone else already had a BCSNCG themed "twas the night".