re: I have a drinking problem. Help. ***Update Page 4***

Your wife needs to know how important it is for you not to drink. It’s totally worth missing ANY event that would make you uncomfortable while you are new and fragile in your sobriety. You will get more solid as time goes on and then you can be around anything.

Parties, weddings, tailgates, crawfish boils, etc… miss it all and get some solid sobriety down. There will always be an event so take your stand now so you can enjoy more important ones in the future.

All this is why having a sponsor from the jump is so important.

ETA: all the events I used to drink at are 100000x more fun now sober. It’s crazy how it happens but your values and what’s important changes over time.

Awesome work dude

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cooked a big meal together, then watched a movie.

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And I bet doing that in a healthy manner was tons better than being wasted at a bar. Sobriety rocks!

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First full week sober in a long while.

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Congratulations. Keep it up.

I agree with everything pwejr88 is saying. I been sponsoring that dude since his day 1 and he knows what he’s talking about and what he’s doing.

You would truly be amazed at how many people are walking around sober alcoholics, even many that you already know.

Regarding sleep…I’ve been taking Trazadone for 15 years, since I got sober. It’s very helpful and totally safe for us.

I’ll say this about sobriety…I was at the Alabama game. When time expired, I tossed my 7 year old on my shoulders, and ran down the stairs with my 17 year old right behind me. We hopped the fence and made one of the very best memories of my entire life…STONE COLD SOBER. I felt everything and remembered all. Sobriety only served to wildly enrich this experience.

Life is so much better without the drink. EVERYTHING in my life is better because of sobriety

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AA has a terrible track record and the numbers don't lie

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This is a statement if pure ignorance. I have been in the program for 15 years, and I have never once seen a single person fail who has actually practiced the program properly.

Thank you sir for the kind words and congratulations.

Now allow me to retort:

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--the "one drink, and you're back to square one!!!"

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In 15 years of attending AA, giving recovery talks all over the Southern United States, and attending thousands of meetings spanning several countries, I have never once heard this phrase. Perhaps you have been misinformed. I do understand what you are trying to say with this, but it's a rather obtuse and short sighted take. While one drink may necessitate the resetting of a sobriety date, it absolutely does not mean, that you are back to square one and all is lost. Many Many Many people, in fact probably most folks in sobriety have had "slips", including myself, picked up right where we left off in the program, and went on to long term sobriety and quality recovery. The phrase which you provided, is far from accurate in terms of how the program of recovery works.

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--alcoholism is a "disease"

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So... while the program of AA agrees with this, the Disease Theory of Alcoholism is not an AA thing. The Theory AND it's Genetic component is accepted by every major medical association in the world, including the largest association of physicians, the American Medical Association. I have been and will continue to defer to them on the issue. Perhaps they know a bit more than the both of us.

However, I'm not here and it's not my intention to convince YOU of anything. Rather, I just want folks to know that if they are struggling with alcoholism, that there is something out there that just might be for them. It was for me and millions of others, and it saved our lives. It is absolutely a viable solution.

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In 15 years of attending AA, giving recovery talks all over the Southern United States, and attending thousands of meetings spanning several countries, I have never once heard this phrase. Perhaps you have been misinformed. I do understand what you are trying to say with this, but it's a rather obtuse and short sighted take. While one drink may necessitate the resetting of a sobriety date, it absolutely does not mean, that you are back to square one and all is lost. Many Many Many people, in fact probably most folks in sobriety have had "slips", including myself, picked up right where we left off in the program, and went on to long term sobriety and quality recovery. The phrase which you provided, is far from accurate in terms of how the program of recovery works.

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We're talking semantics here. In this very thread- multiple times - posters have repeated some version of the mantra I'm referring to.

Case in point:

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Time doesn’t matter. We’re both one drink away from it being just like it was.

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The poster that said that does not know the poster he was saying it to from Adam. And yet it's put forth as just casual, received orthodoxy.

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Which is why you can be sober for 20 years, have one drink and wind up naked in Mexico.

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Again, the absurd pop cliche of "one drink, and it's back to square one!!!"

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Once an alcoholic, always one

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A variation on essentially the same theme.

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So... while the program of AA agrees with this, the Disease Theory of Alcoholism is not an AA thing. The Theory AND it's Genetic component is accepted by every major medical association in the world, including the largest association of physicians, the American Medical Association. I have been and will continue to defer to them on the issue. Perhaps they know a bit more than the both of us.

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There was a time when I would have just agreed with you on this. But I don't see how you can make such an appeal to authority when the authorities have been shown to be so thoroughly corrupt. The AMA is one of the poster children for this. I'd also add: ADA, AHA, CDC, etc.

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However, I'm not here and it's not my intention to convince YOU of anything. Rather, I just want folks to know that if they are struggling with alcoholism, that there is something out there that just might be for them. It was for me and millions of others, and it saved our lives. It is absolutely a viable solution.

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Ditto. I don't need to convince YOU of anything. And speaking of solutions, it's why I offered up the alternative path of deep trauma mining - to attack root causes and not just symptoms (which is what alcohol abuse is - a symptom).

I think AA can work for some people - but I don't like seeing the casual cliches thrown around here, as I think it sets people up for failure.

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Any ideas on some sleep aides?

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I found one cup of chamomile tea helps calm the mind. Also sipping, hot water. My wife thinks I’m nuts but it works. The hot water forces me to sip it like a bourbon.

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