re: Why do men become so non-social as they age?

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People crave genuine community and it's in short supply.

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Good point.

To answer the question the energy expended compared to the reward doesnt make sense.

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It's amazing to me how many people in my generation crave what our parents seemed to develop so much more easily - a handful of very good family friends. People in your neighborhood who you'd trust your kids with, go on vacation with, etc. I'd go so far as to say people are desperate for it. People crave genuine community and it's in short supply.

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We actually have this, to a degree. It’s more the moms and kids, and more specifically the daughters. I’m the outlier dad I guess, but I don’t really care for any of the dads of my son’s friends. They’re nice enough, but I just don’t have much in common with any of them. I get along fairly well with a few of the dads of my daughter’s friends. We’ve taken a couple of beach vacations with them. My daughter’s best friend lives a block away and they are always at each other’s house.

All that said, I’m probably the only one that hasn’t made a long term friend in the process, but that’s just my nature. I’m fine sitting out by my fire pit by myself listening to music.

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It's amazing to me how many people in my generation crave what our parents seemed to develop so much more easily - a handful of very good family friends. People in your neighborhood who you'd trust your kids with, go on vacation with, etc. I'd go so far as to say people are desperate for it. People crave genuine community and it's in short supply.

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Well said. This applies to me honestly and was one of the reasons I moved back home to Monroe when I got a job opportunity there in 2018 and I was picking up the pieces of a flooded home after Hurricane Harvey in 2017 in Houston. I know most people on here shite on Monroe and by all accounts it is warranted but there is a solid connection of mostly Monroe but lots of NE LA Christian based guys that are all connected through a men's retreat program that sprouted out of the Catholic church there. It has connected lots of guys and families in the last several years and it truly amazes me the bond that we all share. It is something that has literally blown me away. Even better is a few of my closet buddies are actively involved and honestly, I crave that kind of connection with guys I have known since childhood.

I still go back and do retreats. I gave my testimony at the last Methodist retreat in February after I survived almost dying from Covid last year. It meant a lot to me and means a lot to me to be around a great group of guys trying to help others build a relationship with Jesus. I also still hit bible study through Zoom with the guys on Monday afternoons and could literally make one every other night if I wanted to from other churches in Monroe that have splintered off and done their own retreats.