- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
re: Wishing you were less in your head and more present
Posted on 11/24/24 at 8:42 pm to Geert
Posted on 11/24/24 at 8:42 pm to Geert
quote:
I would do anything to have a more consistent state of mind that is chasing kindness, loving others, forgetting about whatever pointless narrative is filling my headspace that particular moment/day.
I wasn’t joking about shrooms but I’m sure some of the books mentioned can teach you. Everything starts with breathing. I use to laugh at that thought, as initially I couldn’t do it consistently enough, but once you start it works. Close your eyes and focus on your breaths and only that. May only last 5 seconds. Wait a minute and try it again. Start by doing it a few times a day and be consistent every single day.
quote:
The moments of clarity come when reading a book/watching a movie/hearing a story about things that move the heart.
Then do that as much as possible also
quote:
Life can be going just fine but there is still something interfering with being the person you really want to be
Well you need to know what it is that makes YOU happy, not what others are expecting you to be. Outside of throwing away wife and kids, don’t do that

quote:
I often think of how people reflect on their lives when they are at the end of the road.
Still isn’t too late. Be present on the deathbed, enjoy your remaining time with family. No different than an airplane crashing into my house as I’m typing this. We don’t know our last moments
quote:
Anyone ever had a pivotal shift that changed your life? Does it have to be a rock bottom/tragedy moment? I know…thinking this way is exhibit A of being too much in my head
Well I was an alcoholic but I also was dealing with midlife crisis, monotony of life, stressful job, wife, kids, money, same ole same ole. Change wasn’t instant for me, took time. I’m 52 and much better off than I was in my 30s. I trust God more, find more happiness in sitting in backyard watching birds or talking to my kids and wife than anything else in life. But I also enjoy many other things. Less time on screens helps also but you people are too funny and this site can be addictive
Posted on 11/24/24 at 10:37 pm to Geert
It’s probably some narrative that you adopted that makes you feel this way. In actuality, these characteristics that you think are negative, probably have some positive impact on who you are. For example, being in your head could mean that you are higher in compassion and consideration.
Although modernity has blindsided us with interference, there has been a couple million years of evolution to make you a successful person. Or God if you rather.
We can’t control our thoughts, (don’t think of a white bear.) But we can control how long we ruminate on those thoughts. The best meditation analogy is where thoughts are clouds and you noticed them, but you let them float on by. Or cars at an intersection you see them but they quickly leave your Periphery.
My best advice is to be intentional, and define your values, make a mission statement, One for your marriage, one for your family if you want. Think of the most fulfilling Moments in your life and find the common denominator. It won’t likely be unique, but you will be able to find these values and everything you do. Create a plan on how you satisfy these values, and Periodically review, like Monthly or quarterly.
Although modernity has blindsided us with interference, there has been a couple million years of evolution to make you a successful person. Or God if you rather.
We can’t control our thoughts, (don’t think of a white bear.) But we can control how long we ruminate on those thoughts. The best meditation analogy is where thoughts are clouds and you noticed them, but you let them float on by. Or cars at an intersection you see them but they quickly leave your Periphery.
My best advice is to be intentional, and define your values, make a mission statement, One for your marriage, one for your family if you want. Think of the most fulfilling Moments in your life and find the common denominator. It won’t likely be unique, but you will be able to find these values and everything you do. Create a plan on how you satisfy these values, and Periodically review, like Monthly or quarterly.
Posted on 11/24/24 at 11:57 pm to Geert
Mushrooms are supposed to help with that. So I’ve read. Check out “How to Change Your Mind.” Report back and let us know if it works.
Posted on 11/25/24 at 12:21 am to Geert
quote:
I often think of how people reflect on their lives when they are at the end of the road. Most people seem to have similar regrets of living in some sort of selfish state too often through life. Anyone ever had a pivotal shift that changed your life?
My wife and I were presented the opportunity to take Argentine Tango dance lessons at Fresno State. We talked about seeing older couples on the dance floor and how cool we always thought that was. We wanted to be the older couple on the dance floor so we decided to take the class. The instructor is great and we took a real interest in furthering our education. This lead to joining an additional class at a local dance studio. It turns out that the tango instructor is a two time US Tango national champion. We’ve made new friends and have met some extraordinarily talented people. We just had dinner with a very renowned teacher from Buenos Aires and took a private lesson yesterday and will have another one tomorrow. I’m 47 and she’s 42 so we have decades to look forward to dancing with each other. We’ve been together for nearly 21 years and this has brought us closer than we were before. It has been an awesome experience that we wouldn’t have done if we stuck to our regular routine. Find reasons to say yes when opportunities present themselves and you will find yourself enjoying things you never expected to and truly living because of it. Life is meant to be lived not observed.
Posted on 11/25/24 at 12:35 am to AUbagman
quote:
There is a book I have read a few times, “The Power of Now”. It walks you through it. Takes practice, but it works.
The concept is GREAT and I really like it but that book......god damn it's a hard read
I read a lot, always have one book I'm working on at any given time mostly history and biographical stuff but I swear that book is the deepest thing I've ever read......I wish I'd have just skipped the part about menstrual cycles (yes, you read that correctly) as I was totally confused after it. I tried to read it like a year and a half ago and only made it through 2 chapters......picked it up again like 4 months ago and I'm somewhere around 60% through it maybe more but I'm not going to lie I have little desire to finish it
Posted on 11/25/24 at 1:01 am to Geert
I can relate. Finding your salvation is difficult. We tend to chain ourselves for whatever reason
Posted on 11/25/24 at 6:48 am to Mushroom1968
quote:
Take about 5 grams of psilocybin mushrooms

I was coming to say a couple days of microdosing shrooms will legitimately re-center your perspective and makes most people generally more optimistic and happy.

Posted on 11/25/24 at 7:48 am to Geert
quote:
Wishing you were less in your head and more present
"There's someone in my head, but its not me"
Posted on 11/25/24 at 7:52 am to Hobie101
In addition to The Power of Now, I also find “The Untethered Soul” and “Wherever you go there you are” helpful.
Any book on mindfulness. “The Four Agreements” is also very good
I have a decent commute and do audiobooks with Audible
Any book on mindfulness. “The Four Agreements” is also very good
I have a decent commute and do audiobooks with Audible
Posted on 11/25/24 at 8:21 am to Geert
quote:
Most people seem to have similar regrets of living in some sort of selfish state too often through life.
The world forces this on you, it’s not a choice, you must take care of yourself and family first because no one else will. If everyone lived this way then there would be very few people in need of help.
Posted on 11/25/24 at 8:58 am to BamaCoaster
quote:
You’d have to exit the rat race and move to Europe
quote:
Geert
I think this part of the task has been completed.
Posted on 11/25/24 at 9:03 am to Wishnitwas1998
quote:
it's a hard read
Try his book a new earth, skip the first chapter that is esoteric and probably don’t need to read the last one, by then you’ll get the point. I read it when I was about 25 and didn’t have any issues.
Posted on 11/25/24 at 9:34 am to Geert
consistent acupuncture.
I've been doing this weekly for a few months now. it helped me get out of what felt like constant fight or flight mode, always rushing from one thought or thing to the next. It gives me a lasting sense of well-being, calm, and peace. I'm slower to anger or agitation. shite still happens all the time, of course, but I'm much more mentally equipped to handle it, and I let a lot more slide off my back than I used to.
that and making sure your body is getting all the necessary vitamins it needs consistently.
I've been doing this weekly for a few months now. it helped me get out of what felt like constant fight or flight mode, always rushing from one thought or thing to the next. It gives me a lasting sense of well-being, calm, and peace. I'm slower to anger or agitation. shite still happens all the time, of course, but I'm much more mentally equipped to handle it, and I let a lot more slide off my back than I used to.
that and making sure your body is getting all the necessary vitamins it needs consistently.
Popular
Back to top
