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re: Stuff Old Folks Said

Posted on 11/21/15 at 7:29 pm to
Posted by HerbEaverstinks
Member since Jan 2011
4505 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 7:29 pm to
I was backing up a trailer and asked my grandpa if I had it far enough back and he yelled, "just one more red c%nt hair"
This post was edited on 11/21/15 at 7:32 pm
Posted by Bushmaster
19th Hole
Member since Oct 2008
39954 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 7:37 pm to
My pawpaw used to say about some guy working for him "that boy is as useless as a wart on a dogs dick." I never understood it but still laugh about it and use it myself.
Posted by reverendotis
the jawbone of an arse
Member since Nov 2007
4969 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 7:49 pm to
When someone looks confused, my dad says "He can't tell if he found four horseshoes or lost a horse."
Posted by bobbyleewilliams
Tigertown
Member since Feb 2010
8416 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 9:10 pm to
Like trying to put socks on a rooster.
Raining like a double cunted cow pissing on a flat rock.
F"ck off you young whippersnapper.
Posted by Pavoloco83
Acworth Ga. too many damn dawgs
Member since Nov 2013
15347 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 9:57 pm to
"You've been drinking muddy water" if you were standing in front of the TV. My grandfather said this to imply you were not "see through". Get the frick out of the way...

Posted by mattz1122
Member since Oct 2007
55674 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 10:02 pm to
"I'm dying."
Posted by Meat Newtons
Bon Secour Al
Member since Nov 2015
426 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 10:22 pm to
Don't know the difference between a sneeze & a wet fart.
Posted by CHEDBALLZ
South Central LA
Member since Dec 2009
23101 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 10:24 pm to
If you had to _______ for shite, you wouldn't get the smell.

Put dem dishes in the zinc.

Hes slicker than greased weasel.
Posted by texashorn
Member since May 2008
13122 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 10:37 pm to
Crazier than a shithouse rat

Don't know whether to shite or go blind

A fart longer than a well rope

Slap you nekkid and hide your clothes
This post was edited on 11/21/15 at 10:47 pm
Posted by TutHillTiger
Mississippi Alabama
Member since Sep 2010
49830 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 11:03 pm to
That old peckerwood not word a damn

Even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while
Posted by HogBalls
Member since Nov 2014
8913 posts
Posted on 11/21/15 at 11:20 pm to
Boy when I was your age my dick would get hard as a skillet handle.
Posted by slaughlin
North Dad Gum Louisiana
Member since Apr 2008
3198 posts
Posted on 11/22/15 at 12:44 am to
When someone slips and falls "he went down faster than a one egg pudding"

Like a calf looking at a new gate

I'm hotter than a fresh bred sheep in a pepper patch
Posted by Vacherie Saint
Member since Aug 2015
46208 posts
Posted on 11/22/15 at 8:05 am to
Confusion:
Don't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his arse.

Stupidity:
Don't know his arse from a tomato can

Wild women:
Crazy as a sprayed roach.
Posted by Sir Drinksalot
Member since Aug 2005
16857 posts
Posted on 11/22/15 at 8:15 am to
If I tell you a rooster can pull a wagon, you go get the wagon
Posted by 985TigerSaint
Member since Mar 2009
1704 posts
Posted on 11/22/15 at 8:26 am to
Grandpas used to say:

Couldn't get laid in a women's prison with a fist full of pardons.
Posted by LongueCarabine
Pointe Aux Pins, LA
Member since Jan 2011
8205 posts
Posted on 11/22/15 at 9:06 am to
My first job after graduating high school was with a construction company that summer, trying to make money for tuition to LSU.

We had this crusty old carpenter, we'll call him Mr. Percy. He was a mostly likable old guy, but he didn't like to have to show the newbies anything more than once.

Some guy came up to him asking something and he got fed up. His response was, "I guess I'll have to put it in for you on the wedding night."

At the time, I thought it was one of the funniest things I'd ever heard.

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