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Message
re: O-T Parents of Teens: do you check your kids’ phones?
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:17 am to MissyTiger
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:17 am to MissyTiger
quote:
I’ve never checked her phone. When she got it, part of the deal was that she’d hand it over if I asked for it. I’ve never exercised that, though.
Check her shite... not her BFF texts but to ensure she isn't being texted by some 40 year old turd
0
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:17 am to Sao
quote:
Test it if you don't believe us... Ask for her phone. Recognize the immediate reaction and see if there is hesitation and defiance. You'll see clearly after that, Mom-Friend.
Thats the first clue
Unless she knows that she has everything well hidden
Wish we had all boys.
This post was edited on 12/12/18 at 8:18 am
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:18 am to RJL2
quote:
I feel like this is an alter
What does that even mean? Like an alter ego?
Sorry. My life is not that exciting. Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:20 am to MissyTiger
quote:
My life is not that exciting.
Thats the way i like to keep it as well but the 15 year old daughter is testing that
I believe you may have a good one though. Our oldest Daughter is similar to yours. thank Goodness.This post was edited on 12/12/18 at 8:21 am
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:21 am to MissyTiger
In my opinion, kids, no matter how well behaved, should have no, or very little, expectation of privacy. I go through my oldest two kids phones a couple times a month.
Here’s a story if you’re 2nd guessing: buddy of mine has a 14 yo girl. Good kid, good student, active in sports and extracurricular activities at a good school. Buddy’s wife went through her phone on a whim and found nudes she sent to some little boy. Prior to, they prescribed to the, “they’re entitled to privacy” policy, now they don’t.
Another buddy found out his son was getting bullied by older kids at school, which was effecting his grades.
Here’s a story if you’re 2nd guessing: buddy of mine has a 14 yo girl. Good kid, good student, active in sports and extracurricular activities at a good school. Buddy’s wife went through her phone on a whim and found nudes she sent to some little boy. Prior to, they prescribed to the, “they’re entitled to privacy” policy, now they don’t.
Another buddy found out his son was getting bullied by older kids at school, which was effecting his grades.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:22 am to MissyTiger
I would continue to check it. I went to a meeting the other day on child trafficking. Even the smartest of kids can be targeted through social media. There’s some pretty sick shite going on today that for some reason is not talked about enough. Even trafficking laws are sketchy.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:22 am to MissyTiger
quote:
respecting your teens’ privacy
ill respect it when they are adults, living under their own roof
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:22 am to MissyTiger
My daughter is 15 as well, with a drama-filled life created by her. My wife and I installed an app that costs $35 a year on her phone, so we can have access to everything on her phone from my wife's phone. Not sure of the name of the app, but my wife loves it. And we can curb the stupid shite with my daughter before she has a chance to screw up.
I sometimes look through the app with my wife, and have to tell her to step back from the cliff. Some of the battles aren't worth fighting.
I sometimes look through the app with my wife, and have to tell her to step back from the cliff. Some of the battles aren't worth fighting.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:24 am to go_tigres
quote:
Buddy’s wife went through her phone on a whim and found nudes she sent to some little boy. Prior to, they prescribed to the, “they’re entitled to privacy” policy, now they don’t. Another buddy found out his son was getting bullied by older kids at school, which was effecting his grades.
Boys will use those nudes to manipulate the girls to do what ever they want and if they dont they will say they will send photos to everyone. For all the good phones were at the beginning having these camera's on them has turned them into entirely something else.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:27 am to MissyTiger
quote:
My daughter is 15, and life is full of constant drama
Sounds like a typical teenage girl this is why I hope I never have a daughter
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:30 am to Geecubed
Kids are more tech savvy than many of their parents. While it's always good to do phone checks, they're essentially pointless unless you have a really, really careless child. There are all kinds of apps used to hide photos, conversations, and other personal data on phones that we, as parents, will never find. Even worse (or maybe better?), things like Snapchat which, with its auto-delete feature, almost encourages doing/saying things without fear of consequence.
As someone else earlier mentioned, you're going to have a lot more success just being real with your kids through good communication. Speak of consequences, dangers, and the importance of good decision-making. When my son leaves the house to go somewhere I find maybe a bit sketchy, I don't tell him to "have fun" or "be careful"....I tell him to "make good decisions".
It's a balancing act these days with technology and, truth is, 99% of us are just winging it when trying to protect our teens from what happens online. Just do the best you can, I guess.
As someone else earlier mentioned, you're going to have a lot more success just being real with your kids through good communication. Speak of consequences, dangers, and the importance of good decision-making. When my son leaves the house to go somewhere I find maybe a bit sketchy, I don't tell him to "have fun" or "be careful"....I tell him to "make good decisions".
It's a balancing act these days with technology and, truth is, 99% of us are just winging it when trying to protect our teens from what happens online. Just do the best you can, I guess.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:30 am to Kige Ramsey
I hope you never have neither a daughter or son but for different reasons.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 8:33 am to FLObserver
quote:
Boys will use those nudes to manipulate the girls to do what ever they want and if they dont they will say they will send photos to everyone
My daughter had a boy solicit pictures from her. She declined. This little frick turned around and said he was going to find a random pic on the web, send it around the school, and say it was her body. He didn't, but that's the kind of shite kids are dealing with these days. Ridiculous.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 9:06 am to mmmmmbeeer
quote:
My daughter had a boy solicit pictures from her. She declined. This little frick turned around and said he was going to find a random pic on the web, send it around the school, and say it was her body. He didn't, but that's the kind of shite kids are dealing with these days. Ridiculous.
I'd be showing up at little Johnny's house to have a chat with him & his parents if this ever happened.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 9:17 am to mmmmmbeeer
quote:
As someone else earlier mentioned, you're going to have a lot more success just being real with your kids through good communication. Speak of consequences, dangers, and the importance of good decision-making. When my son leaves the house to go somewhere I find maybe a bit sketchy, I don't tell him to "have fun" or "be careful"....I tell him to "make good decisions".
It's a balancing act these days with technology and, truth is, 99% of us are just winging it when trying to protect our teens from what happens online. Just do the best you can, I guess.
If you raise your kids right, this is the answer. The sneakiest people I know are the ones that had to (gasp) be the sneakiest around their parents.
This post was edited on 12/12/18 at 9:18 am
Posted on 12/12/18 at 9:21 am to momentoftruth87
quote:
I'd be showing up at little Johnny's house to have a chat with him & his parents if this ever happened.
Little Johnny has no parental figure in the home unless you count his whore of a mother who kicks him out at night when a "massage client" randomly shows up at 11pm for his appointment. Little Johnny was expelled from school a couple of weeks ago. Classy kid. Classy family. What kind of response do you think I would've gotten if I'd showed up on their doorstep? Better to just handle it in-house and monitor the situation.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 9:22 am to MissyTiger
It’s not her phone it is my phone. She is just borrowing it for a while.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 9:25 am to mmmmmbeeer
quote:
Little Johnny has no parental figure in the home unless you count his whore of a mother who kicks him out at night when a "massage client" randomly shows up at 11pm for his appointment. Little Johnny was expelled from school a couple of weeks ago. Classy kid. Classy family. What kind of response do you think I would've gotten if I'd showed up on their doorstep? Better to just handle it in-house and monitor the situation.
Yes handle it in house then and tell your daughter if she wants her future to be like his then continue, but let her know that she is better than that and can do better.
I was just saying that regardless of Johnny's situation it would get smashed very quickly and my daughter would not be talking to the kid anymore.
I honestly don't understand women when it comes to this. Another reason why our society is failing because we chose our partners ignorantly and it spirals out of control afterwards.
Best of luck with your daughter brother. Find her a nice young man with a future that was raised properly.
Posted on 12/12/18 at 9:26 am to tgrbaitn08
quote:
I hope you never have neither a daughter or son but for different reasons
Posted on 12/12/18 at 9:29 am to MissyTiger
quote:
My daughter is 15, and life is full of constant drama. She’s a good kid, but I do worry at times.
I’ve never checked her phone. When she got it, part of the deal was that she’d hand it over if I asked for it. I’ve never exercised that, though.
Thanks for posting this and making me feel good about something for once.
While my 13 yr old son is a fricktard (see the fortnite thread) who won't have a phone again for few more months, my 15 yr old daughter is the textbook golden child.
We snapchat daily and text about stupid shite or schedule stuff. I never have the itch to check her phone or app history b/c she's a straight-A student in AP classes(she may have a B in honors chemistry right now), all-state choir as a sophomore, no boy nor girl drama.
However, my two younger daughters will no doubt be drama filled nightmares within 5 yrs with one ending up pregnant in high school i'm sure.
TLDR I don't check my oldest's phone but my 3 younger children most fricking definitely.
So I'm blessed... for now.
This post was edited on 12/12/18 at 9:36 am
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