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re: Longest you have spent away from your wife and kids?
Posted on 11/4/24 at 10:29 am to GeauxZone90
Posted on 11/4/24 at 10:29 am to GeauxZone90
I went to Austin early last month for 4 nights and 5 days. I was super ready to see my wife and kids! Couldn't imagine 6 months!
0
Posted on 11/4/24 at 11:56 am to GeauxZone90
Wow I could not imagine that long.
The longest for me was a week hunting trip in Canada. Really missed my lil boy.
The longest for me was a week hunting trip in Canada. Really missed my lil boy.
Posted on 11/4/24 at 12:20 pm to GeauxZone90
quote:
Her parents who live in a different country are going to help take care of our son. My wife feels overwhelmed due to postpartum depression
Man, I know you feel like she has all the control in this situation, as I'm guessing she's a stay-at-home mom, but you need to prepare for the worst.
You're missing out on memories you will never get back, and your child will have no idea who you are the next time you see them.
I would not agree to this arrangement. See if you can take time off work to help her with the baby. Get her professional help for her PPD. Try anything else.
My guess is she's never coming back to the States and doesn't see a future with you. An acquaintance of mine was working in Italy on a six-month project. He met a woman, they fell in love, she moved here, they got married, and they had two kids back to back. She took them back to Italy to "see her family." A week later, she called him, saying she was never coming back and wanted a divorce. He had to go through all sorts of legal trouble and pay a ton to attornies, but in the end, he gave up and let them stay over there.
Posted on 11/4/24 at 12:27 pm to GeauxZone90
Longest stint? 9 months in the Gulf of Oman. 3 month stints 8 different times. Total time combined, 1,363 days just for military time.
We do take random trips for whatever, week-long education courses, visiting family, etc, but we're pretty done being apart. The damage military deployments do to a family dynamic is horrible, and yet, we're really just bodies for them and they don't care.
We do take random trips for whatever, week-long education courses, visiting family, etc, but we're pretty done being apart. The damage military deployments do to a family dynamic is horrible, and yet, we're really just bodies for them and they don't care.
Posted on 11/4/24 at 12:32 pm to skullhawk
quote:
skullhawk
The difference is we have been together for 8 years before we had kids. I would literally move there before we ever get to the point of divorce
This post was edited on 11/4/24 at 12:34 pm
Posted on 11/4/24 at 12:34 pm to GeauxZone90
quote:well then you should have the plums to tell her she ain't hauling arse halfway around the world with your youngin'
The difference is we have been together for 8 years before we had kids.
Posted on 11/4/24 at 12:34 pm to GeauxZone90
I’d go with her
Would rather live in Australia anyway
Would rather live in Australia anyway
Posted on 11/4/24 at 12:42 pm to GeauxZone90
quote:
The difference is we have been together for 8 years before we had kids. I would literally move there before we ever get to the point of divorce
You assume you have that option. She may be sick of your shite
Posted on 11/4/24 at 1:03 pm to GeauxZone90
Before kids, when it was just my wife and I, probably a couple of weeks. We knew we were moving back to New Orleans from Atlanta; I got a great job offer back in New Orleans but had to start right after Easter. Wife had to wait and finish up her 1st year of medical residency at Emory before transferring to Ochsner in June.
Friend let me stay in a spare bedroom at his house for those few months, but either I drove up there or she came back to New Orleans every other weekend.
After kids, usually no more than about a work-week.
Friend let me stay in a spare bedroom at his house for those few months, but either I drove up there or she came back to New Orleans every other weekend.
After kids, usually no more than about a work-week.
Posted on 11/4/24 at 1:07 pm to LemmyLives
quote:
Military families deal with that, moving states or countries every 2-3 years, etc. it’s one of the reasons I find the Louisiana excuses for staying in state to serve tables with a graduate degree because of family so laughable.
I have been fortunate to work with active duty military members, mostly enlisted folks but also some officers, for many years and the time they spend away from their families is staggering. It is one of the reasons divorce rates are so high.
What's really amazing is that many never get divorced. I know a bunch where both parents are deployed and the kids are with grandparents or even friends...and they mostly make it work. The truly amazing part is the military spouse....not always the woman, by the way, but often its the father who is not in the military....and what they can accomplish alone. It takes a special family to survive but many do it. A military base, today, would be hard pressed to function without the spouses working together. It used to be that the thinking was if the military wanted you to have a family they'd issue you one. That thinking has changed to "what can we do to utilize the talent of all of these military spouses who can do just about anything they set their mind to". It is truly an amazing community and one that civilians like myself seldom get a chance to observe...I have been blessed to have been allowed "in".
Posted on 11/4/24 at 1:09 pm to LSU Tiger Eyes
quote:
You better get a trademark on "your life story" for Hallmark!
Huh?
Posted on 11/4/24 at 2:02 pm to fr33manator
18 months with a brief vacation together at 6 months in.
Posted on 11/5/24 at 7:43 am to Hogbit
quote:
You assume you have that option. She may be sick of your shite
She’ll never come back to the US, she will say it’s best for the baby to be closer to her parents. I would never agree to some crazy shite like this. Most of the posters responding are talking about deployments, which is completely different than this scenario.
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