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re: Is this a red flag? ie: dating and dealing with girl's mom
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:28 pm to RBWilliams8
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:28 pm to RBWilliams8
quote:
You don't want guys treating your baby girl like a piece of arse while you think every dude is a swinging dick. I've seen you mention comments to the extent of "the mom will be around much longer than some swinging dick" or that the OP is mad bc he isn't getting pussy...
I don't have a daughter, but I do think like a rational adult who's able to process things without the use of my penis.
1
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:34 pm to Mike da Tigah
Nobody is even bringing sex into this, though. Has nothing to do with the OP's issues.
I do have a daughter, and I may be protective of her. May give her BF's shite when she's in HS. But as a rational adult, it absurd to think it's okay to barge into her house. Whether I paid for it or not.
I do have a daughter, and I may be protective of her. May give her BF's shite when she's in HS. But as a rational adult, it absurd to think it's okay to barge into her house. Whether I paid for it or not.
This post was edited on 3/2/14 at 5:36 pm
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:36 pm to Mike da Tigah
quote:
That's not even remotely close to a good argument to what I presented, and what many people regret for the rest of their days after their mother, father, or sibling passes, rather the missed opportunities.
I'm sorry, but no matter how good of a parent, son, daughter, or friend you are, when they pass, you will be thinking "what could I have done differently?" Unless you really frick up, chances are, not much. My grandmother passed away a few months ago, and my mother, despite being a better child to her mother than I am, has really beaten herself up about what she could have done differently. I think the same thing, but I know that I was as good as I could have been to her, and my mom went well out of her way and responsibility to my grandmother to make sure her life was great. Even if you are the best father in the world, if your son passes, you'll be thinking what I could have done differently, which makes it a bullshite and solely emotional and not logical argument.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:36 pm to RBWilliams8
RB .. It is good to see you, at 25 years old and a worldly expert on all things marriage, keeping things straight in this thread !!
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:40 pm to TigahRag
People keep attacking the mother here.
The girl should be the one in question.
The girl should be the one in question.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:41 pm to RBWilliams8
quote:
Nobody is even bringing sex into this, though. Has nothing to do with the OP's issues.
The frick it doesn't. The real issue of contention he presented had to do with the mom dropping by at 8 am and her lecture as he phrased it about letting him sleep over, and how it bothered him that she didn't tell her mother she can do what she wants, so it really was about sex.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:45 pm to wadewilson
Need pics of mom first.
This post was edited on 3/2/14 at 5:45 pm
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:45 pm to OMLandshark
quote:
I'm sorry, but no matter how good of a parent, son, daughter, or friend you are, when they pass, you will be thinking "what could I have done differently?" Unless you really frick up, chances are, not much. My grandmother passed away a few months ago, and my mother, despite being a better child to her mother than I am, has really beaten herself up about what she could have done differently. I think the same thing, but I know that I was as good as I could have been to her, and my mom went well out of her way and responsibility to my grandmother to make sure her life was great. Even if you are the best father in the world, if your son passes, you'll be thinking what I could have done differently, which makes it a bullshite and solely emotional and not logical argument.
Losing a loved one is a very emotional thing, and logic has nothing to do with it, and you're right, everyone second guesses themselves, but some things surpass second guessing and are real regrets that are difficult to get past.
I'm just saying that whether you know it or not, what really matters if and when this guy comes or goes or that guy sticks around here and there, is your mom and dad. That's it.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:46 pm to Mike da Tigah
quote:
The frick it doesn't. The real issue of contention he presented had to do with the mom dropping by at 8 am and her lecture as he phrased it about letting him sleep over, and how it bothered him that she didn't tell her mother she can do what she wants, so it really was about sex.
No, its because the mother doesn't respect her, trust her, and wants to completely control her whole life. Has little to do with sex. It could be something as minor as she stops in unexpectedly for breakfast and the mother doesn't approve of her and her boyfriend eating something as unhealthy as Cinnamon Toast Crunch. It still shows all 3 of these things.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:48 pm to TigahRag
I don't think I'm an expert on marriage, it's just a basic concept we are discussing. With anything in life, you don't ignore shite that bothers you and just deal with it later. You don't buy a house that you can barely pay for and say "eh, I'll just deal with it for now and make it work"... That's how debt happens.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:48 pm to OMLandshark
quote:
No, its because the mother doesn't respect her, trust her, and wants to completely control her whole life. Has little to do with sex. It could be something as minor as she stops in unexpectedly for breakfast and the mother doesn't approve of her and her boyfriend eating something as unhealthy as Cinnamon Toast Crunch. It still shows all 3 of these things.
All stemming from the OP's example of the mother talking with her about guys sleeping over..HIM..
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:49 pm to Mike da Tigah
quote:
All stemming from the OP's example of the mother talking with her about guys sleeping over..HIM..
IE: Control freak. They've been dating for seven fricking months. If he was going to gut her in her sleep or steal from her, I think he would have already done it.
This post was edited on 3/2/14 at 5:50 pm
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:51 pm to Mike da Tigah
quote:
All stemming from the OP's example of the mother talking with her about guys sleeping over..HIM..
Nah, that's just all you took from it. It bothers him that she shows up randomly and invites herself to things.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:52 pm to OMLandshark
I agree. When you are 28 it's time to cut the card
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:52 pm to OMLandshark
quote:
IE: Control freak. They've been dating for seven fricking months.
Holy shite... That's like a lifetime.
He should swing his dick around and let her know what's up... It's mom or me...
Posted on 3/2/14 at 5:57 pm to Mike da Tigah
quote:
He should swing his dick around and let her know what's up... It's mom or me...
Or he can calmly say "hey, this bothers me" and sees how she tries to mitigate it. Then go from there. Why be in a relationship you aren't bound to of you aren't happy with it? That's my take on it. It's really not a childish "frick that! You make her choose one or the other" argument.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 6:02 pm to RBWilliams8
quote:
You make her choose one or the other" argument
Hey, maybe she's looking for something solid from him in commitment or something tangible before she let's mom know what's up, and her intentions with this guy. Maybe she's not ready to put a strain on a relationship with her mom she's known her whole life until she thinks this thing is really going somewhere or not. Maybe what he's really after is in his control, or maybe there's nothing there at all, and it's just a fling that isn't worth the confrontation.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 6:05 pm to Mike da Tigah
So talk it out. Simple as that.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 6:06 pm to lsuwontonwrap
Daughter needs to put a lock on the front door of the house and remind mom to call before coming over.
Posted on 3/2/14 at 6:10 pm to RBWilliams8
quote:
So talk it out. Simple as that.
Agreed, but sometimes people would rather play house than deal with it. In other words, they prefer to enjoy the company to being alone, or the relationship to being single, or something else not factored in to actually having a real heart to heart. This goes for both guys and gals I think. It's much easier to play relationship than to get serious or out of relationship, especially until something better comes along. That's just the way some people work whether they are honest about it or not. A bird in the hand philosophy.
This post was edited on 3/2/14 at 6:12 pm
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