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Is it logical to get married and not have kids?
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:21 pm
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:21 pm
I'm 24 and have never even kind of wanted kids. I'm to the point where I do anything more than hang out with a girl a couple times if she wants kids. Our society is changing and it is becoming more socially acceptable not to have kids.
I was talking to a guy much older than me the other day and he we got on this subject. He said that "you don't get to choose" The woman at some point is going to change her mind and want kids and you will be too invested at that point to say no.
When I get to thinking about it, I know only 1 couple off the top of my head that have been married for more than 5 years and don't want children. I'd like to get married at some point, but I just don't see any value in losing that much freedom, the monetary part is only secondary.
I was talking to a guy much older than me the other day and he we got on this subject. He said that "you don't get to choose" The woman at some point is going to change her mind and want kids and you will be too invested at that point to say no.
When I get to thinking about it, I know only 1 couple off the top of my head that have been married for more than 5 years and don't want children. I'd like to get married at some point, but I just don't see any value in losing that much freedom, the monetary part is only secondary.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:23 pm to nugget
Yes. Married and kids are two separate things
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:23 pm to nugget
You think marraige is freedom?
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:23 pm to nugget
Sure. We decided to have kids after a few years but we would've been perfectly happy and had a fulfilling life and marriage without kids. You don't miss what you don't have.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:24 pm to nugget
You can still have a happy marriage without kids. I know married couples that have no plans for children and are just enjoying life together.
As long as you marry someone on the same page as you kids wise. Don't marry someone hoping you can make them change their minds on the issue later.
As long as you marry someone on the same page as you kids wise. Don't marry someone hoping you can make them change their minds on the issue later.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:25 pm to nugget
It is more logical to not get married
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:25 pm to SlowEasyConfident
Wife and I have been married 12 years with no desire for kids. Birth control is 100 percent if done right
This post was edited on 3/27/16 at 10:26 pm
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:25 pm to nugget
Both are a waste of time and money. At the end of the day they'll just break your heart and leave you heartbroken. They both bitch nonstop till they get your way. They steal your money.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:25 pm to nugget
quote:
It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:26 pm to nugget
You might not want a kid now but you may regret it 30 years from now.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:26 pm to danilo
Before I got married we discussed the topic. We decided if and when we wanted to have kids. We would not have gotten married if we didn't agree. It's that simple.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:27 pm to nugget
If you want kids, marry. If it doesn't work, divorce her. No need to marry again.
Unless you want more kids
Unless you want more kids
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:27 pm to Pectus
quote:
You think marraige is freedom?
I see where you're coming from, but a marriage without children can create some sort of freedom. For instance, when I am in my 30's and all of my friends are married, they're not going to want to go out of town with me for the weekend and take trips because they'll be tied down with kids. I also probably wouldn't want to do it by myself.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:27 pm to SlowEasyConfident
Absolutely. Just because you can be a husband or wife doesn't mean you can be a parent. If you know that about yourself then just stay married.
Years may change your mind, but if it doesn't it doesn't make you a bad person.
Being a shitty dad makes you a bad person.
Years may change your mind, but if it doesn't it doesn't make you a bad person.
Being a shitty dad makes you a bad person.
This post was edited on 3/27/16 at 10:34 pm
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:28 pm to Tingle
quote:Well that's stupid reasoning. I know many people who sure seem to regret having them.
You might not want a kid now but you may regret it 30 years from now.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:29 pm to lsunurse
quote:
As long as you marry someone on the same page as you kids wise. Don't marry someone hoping you can make them change their minds on the issue later.
That was my way of thinking but that was also the point of this thread. The guy I was talking to had the belief that most women will change their mind at some point when the clock starts ticking.
Posted on 3/27/16 at 10:29 pm to Tingle
quote:
but you may regret it 30 years from now.
Don't have kids just because you think you might regret not having them later on. Have them because you know that is what you want.
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