Good Morning *Bacon Edition*

Rise and Shine What is Your favorite brand of bacon?





1493 Christopher Columbus discovers Antigua during his second expedition.

1556 The Englishman Richard Chancellor is drowned off Aberdeenshire on his return from a second voyage to Russia.

1647 All Dutch-held areas of New York are returned to English control by the treaty of Westminster.

1775 U.S. Marine Corps founded.

1782 In the last battle of the American Revolution, George Rogers Clark attacks Indians and Loyalists at Chillicothe, in Ohio Territory.

1871 Henry M. Stanley finds Dr. Livingstone at Ujiji near Unyanyembe in Africa.

1879 Little Bighorn participant Major Marcus Reno is caught window-peeping at the daughter of his commanding officer—an offense for which he will be courtmartialed.

1911 President Taft ends a 15,000-mile, 57-day speaking tour.

1911 The Imperial government of China retakes Nanking.

1917 Forty-one US suffragettes are arrested protesting outside the White House.



JOTD: A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."

The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.

The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."