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re: Chuck Norris is suing CBS for $30 million
Posted on 2/3/18 at 12:51 pm to CatsGoneWild
Posted on 2/3/18 at 12:51 pm to CatsGoneWild
Chuck Norris once threw a grenade and killed 50 people.
It would’ve been a lot more, but he did not pull the pin so he could use it again
When Chuck Norris goes to sleep, he does not check under his bed for the bogeyman. The bogeyman looks on top of the bed to make sure that Chuck Norris isn’t sleeping.
Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas
It would’ve been a lot more, but he did not pull the pin so he could use it again
When Chuck Norris goes to sleep, he does not check under his bed for the bogeyman. The bogeyman looks on top of the bed to make sure that Chuck Norris isn’t sleeping.
Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas
This post was edited on 2/3/18 at 12:54 pm
1
Posted on 2/3/18 at 1:12 pm to yallallcrazy
There is no such thing as evolution, there's just a list of animals Chuck Norris allowed to live.
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his grass, he just dares it to grow.
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his grass, he just dares it to grow.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 1:21 pm to CatsGoneWild
Chuck Norris hides a pillow under his gun.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 2:09 pm to Gary Busey
Chuck Norris has a bearskin rug.
The bear isn't dead...it's just afraid to move.
The bear isn't dead...it's just afraid to move.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 2:17 pm to CatsGoneWild
I really miss the Walker Texas Ranger Lever from the old Conan show. That was funnier than anything else I've seen on late night tv in the past 10 years combined.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 3:20 pm to CatsGoneWild
Douche Norris
Posted on 2/3/18 at 5:38 pm to CatsGoneWild
Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the frick down.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 5:47 pm to Amazing Moves
When Satan was kicked out of Heaven, God gave him the option of Hell or Chuck Norris.
He chose Hell.
He chose Hell.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 7:59 pm to Quidam65
Chuck norris brought to orgasm and impregnated 63 women at the same time by giving them the wink and the gun. 6 months later, the 1972 Miami dolphins were born.
November 4th, 2006 an Australian man attempted to correct chuck norris’ grammar. This date has gone down in history as the day the worst mistake ever was made.
August 15, 2013 chuck Norris made a bet with NASA that he could survive re entry without protection. December 21, 2015 a naked chuck Norris streamed over 13 states, reaching an external temperature of 1,274 degrees Fahrenheit. An embarrassed NASA claims it was a meteor and they still owe him a beer.
Behind chuck norris’ Beard is not a chin, but another fist.
November 4th, 2006 an Australian man attempted to correct chuck norris’ grammar. This date has gone down in history as the day the worst mistake ever was made.
August 15, 2013 chuck Norris made a bet with NASA that he could survive re entry without protection. December 21, 2015 a naked chuck Norris streamed over 13 states, reaching an external temperature of 1,274 degrees Fahrenheit. An embarrassed NASA claims it was a meteor and they still owe him a beer.
Behind chuck norris’ Beard is not a chin, but another fist.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 9:14 pm to Jibbajabba
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 9:44 pm to CatsGoneWild
Didn't read them all but so apologies if this was posted....
Chuck Norris lost his left testicle...you may better know this as Jupiter
Chuck Norris lost his left testicle...you may better know this as Jupiter
Posted on 2/3/18 at 9:56 pm to CatsGoneWild
My favorite is..
Chuck Norris's hand is the only hand that can be a royal flush.
Chuck Norris's hand is the only hand that can be a royal flush.
Posted on 2/3/18 at 10:39 pm to CatsGoneWild
quote:Chuck Norris doesn't do pushups. Chuck Norris pushes the Earth down!
How many push-ups can Chuck Norris do? All of them
Posted on 2/3/18 at 10:49 pm to CatsGoneWild
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago. Death just hasn't worked up the courage to tell him yet.
Posted on 2/4/18 at 6:59 am to Peazey
Chuck Norris once challenged lance Armstrong to a “who has more testicles contest”. Chuck Norris won by 4.
Posted on 2/4/18 at 7:33 am to Jibbajabba
welp - my day has started off great - ty all
Posted on 2/4/18 at 8:44 am to Thracken13
When Chuck Norris was told his urinalysis came back positive for steroids, he replied “of course it did. What do you think steroids are made of?”
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