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Started By
Message
re: Anyone ever use a Ouija board and woke any spirts up?
Posted on 1/12/18 at 8:58 pm to NorthshoreTiger76
Posted on 1/12/18 at 8:58 pm to NorthshoreTiger76
No... Spirits aren't real. The afterlife isn't real.
When you die you are dead.
When you die you are dead.
1
Posted on 1/12/18 at 9:04 pm to Beessnax
quote:
... Spirits aren't real. The afterlife isn't real.
When you die you are dead.
Watch out. You'll be called a SJW before long
Posted on 1/12/18 at 9:13 pm to NorthshoreTiger76
Posted on 1/12/18 at 9:14 pm to jdd48
It was beejon. I wrote a little story about it
The sunset sent rivulets of blood streaking across a goldenrod sky as he stepped out of his van at the local grocer's, an old shipping warehouse refitted some decades back. He could feel the heat shimmering off the black asphalt parking lot, making his soles uncomfortably warm. "Sho is hot today.", he said to no one in particular, "well, better get a move on, supper won't cook itself, no no no."
The cold blast of the chilled air was a soothing blanket as he walked in those sliding automatic doors, as if The Lord himself had opened them. "Thank ya kindly," beejon spoke with a slight upturn of his neck and his eyes towards the ceiling, then grabbed a buggy and began to make groceries.
Carrots, bellpeppers, onions, collard greens...beejon inspected each one with a tender hand, humming and muttering to himself all the while, turning them over, looking for bruises and dark spots. "Corruption in is a terrible sin," he quipped. The lady next to him gave him a queer look and stepped back to her buggy, but he paid her no mind, it was squash squeezing time.
When he got to the tomatoes, a hair raised on his neck, bristling...he began to sense an uncomfortable warmth spreading across his back. His smile faded in a blink, and his eyes focused in consternation as he slowly turned around. No longer was the store filled with just shoppers. Where once there were fresh bread and pastries now stood dark figures, shades given terrible form, as if shadows were engulfed in black fire. In guttural, inhuman tones a voice like thunder rolled from the things snarling lips.
"I have come for you, seer...the master bids you see true power, so you may quiver as your precious faith fails you..." Beejon's eyes were steely as his neck craned to meet the gaze of the beast. "Tell your master I am ready," he hissed, "a power greater than his flows through these veins."
Reaching into his buggy he selected a carrot and a stalk of celery, and holding them crossed in front of himself he uttered a prayer. The shade grimaced and growled at the words, and all of a sudden it was not produce in his hands, but flaming swords of holy fire. In response the beast opened his claws and a whip of black flame appeared. His dark minions skittered and surrounded beejon, cackling and hissing. The smells of brimstone and burnt flesh filled his nostrils.
Then they attacked...
The minions were like fiendish monkeys, shrieking and whooping as they closed in on him, spitting curses in a language too foul to utter. Beejon turned, keeping his eyes on their commander as he faced them. One lunged at him with blazing speed, but with the wide arc of his sword beejon cleft it in twain, the two halves writhing on the linoleum before melting into a bubbling tar. Another jumped upon his back, clinging to his skull as claws raked his scalp. A backward thrust through it's warped face caused it to scream with the sound of metal tearing. The next moment its head exploded like a rotted pumpkin.
Another raked a clawed hand across his cheek until he dispatched it by cleaving its skull in two as it burst in a cloud of umpteen flies, a maddening buzzing like a field of fetid corpses. One by one they attacked, and one by one they perished, the white hot flame of his weapons sending them back to whatever accursed plane they hailed from. Finally, only their leader and beejon remained in that place, eyes burning holes in each other. Then the beast spoke again.
"I AM KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH! Servant of the infernal prince, lord of the innumerable damned! No mortal shall hear my name and live!" His whip cracked against beejon's face, a twisted scar forming as that dark fire seared his flesh. But he did not scream. He only grimaced and bellowed back. "I AM BEEJON! Servant of the one true redeemer! I am his sword that stands against the dark forces! Feel the wrath of the Lord's fury!"
The two rushed and a terrible sound of their battle filled the air, like the screams of a thousand dying suns. His blades flashed in arcs of silver heat as the beasts whip cracked and sizzled. Over and over they clashed until that evil lash found purchase and coiled around beejon's neck. The beast lifted him up off the ground, his legs dangling and twitching as the struggled for purchase where there was none. The demon smiled a hideous grin as it looked into beejon's eyes.
"Your master is weak, whelp. Gaze upon the face of power before you perish."
In a gasping breath, beejon spit and cursed. "When I die, I shall enter the house of my father. But you will only ever know the torment of the pits."
With his waning strength he raised his swords, crossed onto the thing's dark shoulders. With a snicker-snack he crossed them again and the grin faded from the beasts horrid lips. Its head tumbled down and its body twisted and writhed in great agony before imploding into a tiny ball of swirling shadow. As beejon fell to the floor, he heard a voice.
A voice that had no body attached to it, booming around him.
"Clean up in produce. Someone's had a bit of an accident."
|||
|||
KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH lay prostrate upon the white hot coals as waves of agony wracked his corrupted, misshapen form. Stunted winged imps poked and prodded at him with pointed sticks, piercing the blackened flesh at the joints, trying futilely to rejoin the limbs where they had been torn apart during his return to the infernal realm. In a cacophony that sounded like a thousand broken church bells pealing off key, the flames filled the chamber and a gargantuan figure appeared. Twisted horns wreathed its head like a crown and pierced back into the pallid skin above its mouth, becoming fangs.
Drool dripped from its gaping maw and hissed and sizzled as it dissolved an imp foolish enough to be beneath it. It did not scream for long. KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH rose like a broken plaything, joints jutting at odd angles that were /wrong/ even in this place. He did not meet his master's gaze, and his voice, powerful as it was, seemed pitiful before the terrible archdemon before him.
"My liege," he began,"he is more powerful than we believed. He slaughtered my minions and drew upon some deep strength. He was within my grasp, but somehow he found the wherewithal to strike a blow. Give me another chance and I wi-."
His sentence was cut off by a bellowing that incinerated the imps around him and made him wither. The great Defiler spoke with a voice that could pulverize stone and turn iron to rust, like an army of banshees beating drums made of human flesh.
"You...have...failed...me."
The air grew so hot it shimmered. Hunks of KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH's skin turned to ash. He opened his mouth to beg for mercy but found his tongue had melted. Terror and pain crawled out his throat in a gurgled cry as his eyeballs boiled and burst.
"If power is his strength..."
His bones shattered and splintered inside his skin.
"Then flesh is his weakness..."
One by one his ribs burst from his chest, leaving ragged holes that dripped gore.
"Summon the ageless harlot...GUZILKUMMAR ALIDAAL..."
What was left of his skin sloughed off. His innards collapsed into a neat pile before catching fire.
The sunset sent rivulets of blood streaking across a goldenrod sky as he stepped out of his van at the local grocer's, an old shipping warehouse refitted some decades back. He could feel the heat shimmering off the black asphalt parking lot, making his soles uncomfortably warm. "Sho is hot today.", he said to no one in particular, "well, better get a move on, supper won't cook itself, no no no."
The cold blast of the chilled air was a soothing blanket as he walked in those sliding automatic doors, as if The Lord himself had opened them. "Thank ya kindly," beejon spoke with a slight upturn of his neck and his eyes towards the ceiling, then grabbed a buggy and began to make groceries.
Carrots, bellpeppers, onions, collard greens...beejon inspected each one with a tender hand, humming and muttering to himself all the while, turning them over, looking for bruises and dark spots. "Corruption in is a terrible sin," he quipped. The lady next to him gave him a queer look and stepped back to her buggy, but he paid her no mind, it was squash squeezing time.
When he got to the tomatoes, a hair raised on his neck, bristling...he began to sense an uncomfortable warmth spreading across his back. His smile faded in a blink, and his eyes focused in consternation as he slowly turned around. No longer was the store filled with just shoppers. Where once there were fresh bread and pastries now stood dark figures, shades given terrible form, as if shadows were engulfed in black fire. In guttural, inhuman tones a voice like thunder rolled from the things snarling lips.
"I have come for you, seer...the master bids you see true power, so you may quiver as your precious faith fails you..." Beejon's eyes were steely as his neck craned to meet the gaze of the beast. "Tell your master I am ready," he hissed, "a power greater than his flows through these veins."
Reaching into his buggy he selected a carrot and a stalk of celery, and holding them crossed in front of himself he uttered a prayer. The shade grimaced and growled at the words, and all of a sudden it was not produce in his hands, but flaming swords of holy fire. In response the beast opened his claws and a whip of black flame appeared. His dark minions skittered and surrounded beejon, cackling and hissing. The smells of brimstone and burnt flesh filled his nostrils.
Then they attacked...
The minions were like fiendish monkeys, shrieking and whooping as they closed in on him, spitting curses in a language too foul to utter. Beejon turned, keeping his eyes on their commander as he faced them. One lunged at him with blazing speed, but with the wide arc of his sword beejon cleft it in twain, the two halves writhing on the linoleum before melting into a bubbling tar. Another jumped upon his back, clinging to his skull as claws raked his scalp. A backward thrust through it's warped face caused it to scream with the sound of metal tearing. The next moment its head exploded like a rotted pumpkin.
Another raked a clawed hand across his cheek until he dispatched it by cleaving its skull in two as it burst in a cloud of umpteen flies, a maddening buzzing like a field of fetid corpses. One by one they attacked, and one by one they perished, the white hot flame of his weapons sending them back to whatever accursed plane they hailed from. Finally, only their leader and beejon remained in that place, eyes burning holes in each other. Then the beast spoke again.
"I AM KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH! Servant of the infernal prince, lord of the innumerable damned! No mortal shall hear my name and live!" His whip cracked against beejon's face, a twisted scar forming as that dark fire seared his flesh. But he did not scream. He only grimaced and bellowed back. "I AM BEEJON! Servant of the one true redeemer! I am his sword that stands against the dark forces! Feel the wrath of the Lord's fury!"
The two rushed and a terrible sound of their battle filled the air, like the screams of a thousand dying suns. His blades flashed in arcs of silver heat as the beasts whip cracked and sizzled. Over and over they clashed until that evil lash found purchase and coiled around beejon's neck. The beast lifted him up off the ground, his legs dangling and twitching as the struggled for purchase where there was none. The demon smiled a hideous grin as it looked into beejon's eyes.
"Your master is weak, whelp. Gaze upon the face of power before you perish."
In a gasping breath, beejon spit and cursed. "When I die, I shall enter the house of my father. But you will only ever know the torment of the pits."
With his waning strength he raised his swords, crossed onto the thing's dark shoulders. With a snicker-snack he crossed them again and the grin faded from the beasts horrid lips. Its head tumbled down and its body twisted and writhed in great agony before imploding into a tiny ball of swirling shadow. As beejon fell to the floor, he heard a voice.
A voice that had no body attached to it, booming around him.
"Clean up in produce. Someone's had a bit of an accident."
|||
|||
KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH lay prostrate upon the white hot coals as waves of agony wracked his corrupted, misshapen form. Stunted winged imps poked and prodded at him with pointed sticks, piercing the blackened flesh at the joints, trying futilely to rejoin the limbs where they had been torn apart during his return to the infernal realm. In a cacophony that sounded like a thousand broken church bells pealing off key, the flames filled the chamber and a gargantuan figure appeared. Twisted horns wreathed its head like a crown and pierced back into the pallid skin above its mouth, becoming fangs.
Drool dripped from its gaping maw and hissed and sizzled as it dissolved an imp foolish enough to be beneath it. It did not scream for long. KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH rose like a broken plaything, joints jutting at odd angles that were /wrong/ even in this place. He did not meet his master's gaze, and his voice, powerful as it was, seemed pitiful before the terrible archdemon before him.
"My liege," he began,"he is more powerful than we believed. He slaughtered my minions and drew upon some deep strength. He was within my grasp, but somehow he found the wherewithal to strike a blow. Give me another chance and I wi-."
His sentence was cut off by a bellowing that incinerated the imps around him and made him wither. The great Defiler spoke with a voice that could pulverize stone and turn iron to rust, like an army of banshees beating drums made of human flesh.
"You...have...failed...me."
The air grew so hot it shimmered. Hunks of KRAZZIRALL MOGGOTH's skin turned to ash. He opened his mouth to beg for mercy but found his tongue had melted. Terror and pain crawled out his throat in a gurgled cry as his eyeballs boiled and burst.
"If power is his strength..."
His bones shattered and splintered inside his skin.
"Then flesh is his weakness..."
One by one his ribs burst from his chest, leaving ragged holes that dripped gore.
"Summon the ageless harlot...GUZILKUMMAR ALIDAAL..."
What was left of his skin sloughed off. His innards collapsed into a neat pile before catching fire.
Posted on 1/12/18 at 9:14 pm to CottonWasKing
quote:
Watch out. You'll be called a SJW before long
Lol... Trust me I am 100% Republican politically. I just know what is real and what isn't when it comes to afterlife fantasies.
Posted on 1/13/18 at 3:40 am to NorthshoreTiger76
Do not mess with those things. It opens up doors you never want to open.
Posted on 1/13/18 at 6:13 am to djmicrobe
quote:
Do not mess with those things. It opens up doors you never want to open.
It’s a parlor game. Designed to tittilate and amuse and get a rise out of 19th century ladies. It wasn’t even associated with the occult until some people attached that to it.
The breakfast burrito i’m Eating has more chance of “opening doors” than a ouija board.
Posted on 1/13/18 at 6:14 am to NorthshoreTiger76
I believe that’s how I ended up with my ex wife
Posted on 1/13/18 at 8:26 am to NorthshoreTiger76
The only way it"works" is with more than three people and two being in on it.
Posted on 1/13/18 at 8:40 am to fr33manator
quote:
The breakfast burrito i’m Eating has more chance of “opening doors”
You're talking about putting it in your butt, aten't you?
Posted on 1/13/18 at 8:56 am to fr33manator
that wall of text should be used to keep the Mexicans out. 
Posted on 1/13/18 at 8:57 am to GetBackToWork
quote:You were lied to. Throwing a sticker with the alphabet and numbers on a piece of cardboard is tool to contact the dead?
Had some friends in college who played with a board as a joke one night. They thought it got weird then put it away. The next day on campus, one of them was in the library studying, then got on the system to look up the words being spelled out (before everyone had internet access). The ouija board spelled out a state prison up north and a convicted murderer. They threw the game away afterwards.
Posted on 1/13/18 at 9:17 am to georgia
It’s a short story. It’s made of words.
It’s a wonder some of you can deal with dr. Seuss.
Guess I need some illustrations
It’s a wonder some of you can deal with dr. Seuss.
Guess I need some illustrations
Posted on 1/13/18 at 9:28 am to fr33manator
I spirted your mom once
Posted on 1/13/18 at 9:34 am to NorthshoreTiger76
If you are a Christian you are supposed to stay away from stuff like this.
Posted on 1/13/18 at 9:57 am to NorthshoreTiger76
We were goofing with one back in college and something happened I can't explain. We had a dorm room full of people gathered around it and it was doing the normal things they do.
Someone banged on the big window and everybody jumped. All of the sudden, the board instantly started going P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E really fast and wouldn't stop. In a few minutes my buddy opens the door and asks "Did I scare y'all?" referring to the bang on the window.
Everyone looked at him and lost their shite.
He was wearing a Pepe shirt.
Someone banged on the big window and everybody jumped. All of the sudden, the board instantly started going P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E really fast and wouldn't stop. In a few minutes my buddy opens the door and asks "Did I scare y'all?" referring to the bang on the window.
Everyone looked at him and lost their shite.
He was wearing a Pepe shirt.
Posted on 1/13/18 at 1:32 pm to NorthshoreTiger76
quote:
Does this board work?
Excellent for making new friends with demons and other freaks from alternate dimensions.
Enjoy!!
This post was edited on 1/13/18 at 4:26 pm
Posted on 1/13/18 at 1:34 pm to NorthshoreTiger76
quote:
Does this board work?
No. /thread
Posted on 1/13/18 at 1:35 pm to Scoop
quote:
We were goofing with one back in college and something happened I can't explain. We had a dorm room full of people gathered around it and it was doing the normal things they do. Someone banged on the big window and everybody jumped. All of the sudden, the board instantly started going P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E-P-E really fast and wouldn't stop. In a few minutes my buddy opens the door and asks "Did I scare y'all?" referring to the bang on the window. Everyone looked at him and lost their shite. He was wearing a Pepe shirt.
Praise Kek
Posted on 1/13/18 at 2:38 pm to OweO
I recently awoke Harry Houdini with an ouija board.....but for some reason he couldn’t get out.
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