re: What a shock. Going to doc and told you will have four kids.

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There are so many kids in this country that could use a good home.

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There are, but it doesn't change the fact that

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Adoption is expensive & emotionally exhaustive, with no guarantees

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IVF and other fertility treatments are expensive too, and they aren't guaranteed either, but it is asinine to act like adoption is much better.

I think adoption is a fantastic route, but I would never fault someone for exploring other avenues, particularly because adoption is also a route for parents who don't need IVF or other treatments and just want another child. We would never fault someone who choses to have a traditional pregnancy instead of adoption, so I don't think we should treat IVF any differently.