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Posted on 4/16/16 at 10:53 pm to hendersonshands
Remember kids, never leave the computer alone, around anyone, while you are still logged into TD.
Posted on 4/16/16 at 10:56 pm to Bossier2323
quote:
Dear Facebook
No, it belongs right here.
Posted on 4/16/16 at 10:58 pm to CoolHand
* The first time I learned that I could maybe jerk off was when I was lying face down in my bed and Wild On E came on and when I moved a little, it felt really good. I kept trying to replicate it but I couldn't for a while and then I started using my hands and figured it out pretty soon.
Posted on 4/16/16 at 10:59 pm to hendersonshands
quote:
* When I watch The Americans, I root for the Russians.
I root for the main characters. Its hard not to.
quote:
I really like Abita Amber
How is this a confession?
quote:
When I was younger, I stuck my finger all the way up my butt. I couldn't get the smell off my finger for a day.
I experimented with it but never went all the way.
quote:
I've never seen The Godfather or Pulp Fiction
Probably the biggest WTF? in this confession.
quote:
I haven't read a novel in several years, just can't find anything that interests me
Im either too lazy or too busy to read. Give me the tv and internet.
quote:
I shite my pants once in 7th grade
Did this in the 10th grade because the teacher wouldn't let me use the bathroom. Finally I went anyway and crapped in my pants on the way to it. I waited until someone came in there and asked them to get a teacher. Then I told the teacher to have the office contact my mom and bring me some clean pants. I was in there for 2 hours.
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:01 pm to Asgard Device
* I think the pledge of allegiance is weird as frick and that we should probably not have kids say it before school starts
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:01 pm to hendersonshands
quote:I assume the only reason you didn't admit to being gay is that it is common knowledge
hendersonshands
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:02 pm to OWLFAN86
I wouldn't say gay but $5 is $5
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:03 pm to hendersonshands
* Sometimes when I'm drunk, I become a nihilist.
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:05 pm to hendersonshands
quote:I admire your commitment to capitalism
I wouldn't say gay but $5 is $5
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:11 pm to hendersonshands
There's this young lady about 28 years younger than me I see every few weeks, she wants me to pee all over her and in her mouth among other unspeakable acts
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:12 pm to hendersonshands
I was expecting "I don't see nothing wrong with a little bump and grind".
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:15 pm to hendersonshands
When I was stationed at Ft. Campbell , KY, the chow hall we mainly used was closest to the 101st MP Battalion's living quarters. I was with the 194th MP Battalion, but our building was 200 yards away. I ate something that didn't agree with me and I had to find a bathroom ASAP. I knew I couldn't make it to my barracks so I ran into the 101st and unleashed holy Hell on the men's room. Unfortunately I decided to let a fart slip out enroute and I ended up shitting in my pants! I threw my used underwear in the trash can afterwards and took off. We would do our PT and other training with the 101st and everyone kept talking about the mystery shitty drawers in the trashcan for a week. I heard that the First Sergeant later suspected the resident frick up for being the culprit and scared the guy to the point where he actually confessed to it!
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:22 pm to DrGiggles
quote:We have one here-
the resident frick up
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:25 pm to soccerfüt
how many times have you fapped to that ?
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:28 pm to hendersonshands
quote:
I didn't ever think I'd wtch that movie but if his dick's out, I'll probably watch it and tell people that I just loved the old movie so much that I had to see the new
This is one of the least surprising
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:46 pm to hendersonshands
I Googled Abita Amber thinking that was a porn actress
Posted on 4/16/16 at 11:48 pm to hendersonshands
You gotta read Vonnegut, comrade. Slapstick is hillair
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