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re: I have a buddy up North whose wife went on a cheating spree with a guy.
Posted on 1/5/16 at 11:23 am to Champagne
Posted on 1/5/16 at 11:23 am to Champagne
quote:Show him this post...
I'm going to advise him to come to the OT and read the advice for himself right here.
This isn't like one of those old Peanut Butter Cup commercials where she was walking down a street eating peanut butter and accidentally bumped into some guy who was eating chocolate and ... Oooops... his dick fell into her snatch.
She willfully and purposely cheated on you for an entire weekend then lied to you about it with an embarrassingly implausible lie. She met this guy, made a conscious and purposeful decision to ride him (what was most likely multiple times) over an entire weekend. She then made another decision to fabricate some ridiculous farce because she apparently believes you are too stupid or too desperate to call her out on it.
A good, healthy relationship is built on mutual trust and respect and these are fostered through open, honest and caring communication. I don't know the particulars on the communication aspect your relationship, but apparently she has little respect for you and she has proven you can't trust her.
For me, this relationship would be over. The soap opera simplicity of the lie itself is almost as disrespectful as the actual act she spent all weekend doing with some other guy. For whatever reason she hasn't grown up and unless you married her just to raise her, the only real decision is to send her packing.
You can try counselling, but in the back of her mind there will still be that immature piece of her that will lose what little respect she still has for you, that piece that tells her you would be willing to look the other way if she can just come up with a more plausible excuse next time.
It's better to be lonely and alone than lonely in a relationship because when it's just you, you control it.
2
Posted on 1/5/16 at 11:32 am to Bard
quote:
This isn't like one of those old Peanut Butter Cup commercials where she was walking down a street eating peanut butter and accidentally bumped into some guy who was eating chocolate and ... Oooops... his dick fell into her snatch.
She willfully and purposely cheated on you for an entire weekend then lied to you about it with an embarrassingly implausible lie. She met this guy, made a conscious and purposeful decision to ride him (what was most likely multiple times) over an entire weekend. She then made another decision to fabricate some ridiculous farce because she apparently believes you are too stupid or too desperate to call her out on it.
A good, healthy relationship is built on mutual trust and respect and these are fostered through open, honest and caring communication. I don't know the particulars on the communication aspect your relationship, but apparently she has little respect for you and she has proven you can't trust her.
For me, this relationship would be over. The soap opera simplicity of the lie itself is almost as disrespectful as the actual act she spent all weekend doing with some other guy. For whatever reason she hasn't grown up and unless you married her just to raise her, the only real decision is to send her packing.
You can try counselling, but in the back of her mind there will still be that immature piece of her that will lose what little respect she still has for you, that piece that tells her you would be willing to look the other way if she can just come up with a more plausible excuse next time.
It's better to be lonely and alone than lonely in a relationship because when it's just you, you control it.
that's just all your opinion man. who cares if she fricked a dude for a weekend. maybe he ca get to turn this into a threesome w/ a friend of hers. maybe she's had countless years of faithfulness he should be appreciative for and she just had to release a few demons out. She came back to him. She probably is out of his league so keep being happy. He needs to work on bettering himself and make himself a more desirable partner so that she doesn't need to do this again.
Posted on 1/5/16 at 7:13 pm to Bard
quote:
Show him this post...
That's a nice post, but, it's better to stay out of it, IMHO.
The more I think about it the more I'm convinced that it would be a HUGE mistake for me to say anything other than suggest marriage counseling and NOT get myself involved in any way. It would be stupid for me to suggest that she's a liar. If they make up, I'll be the bad guy. I'm not going to involve myself in their marriage in any way.
Anybody who disagrees just hasn't thought this thing through.
This post was edited on 1/5/16 at 7:18 pm
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