re: Recruiting Assistance Team (RAT Squad) (revised)

I would like to formally nominate myself!
Qualifications: NONE
Extenuating circumstances: I'm white, middle aged, with absolutely no inside information or sources. But I yearn for tigerdroppings acceptance and insider status. Just imagine how proud my teenage daughter would be knowing that I had college age colleagues. Please hurry, the suspense is killing me.
PS... I did play college football so I probably know more than some others who wouldn't know which end of a jock to step into and couldn't put it on correctly without the aid of an instructional video.

thanks for your time and consideration