re: Close relative is in hospice...(update page 5)

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Exactly. I just wanted to bring to this board for Big Scrub (and others in similar situations) that the intentions for being there for support are as good as gold, but don't beat yourself up as a failure if they pass while you stepped away for a few minutes.

We don't fully understand this, but all we can do is trust God's plan.

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When my grandmother died, I had been there at the hospital pretty much constantly. I finally had to leave and take care of some things and she died while I was gone. I really believe she didn't want to go as long as I was there.

Hello, old friend. When my mother-in-law died, she being a Buddhist, the monks and nuns would not let us hover over her at the end. The idea being, that we all die alone. That conforms with my view, we live an entire life alone, are born alone and die alone, -just hopefully surrounded by those we love.

Anyhow, the monk told me the day before her death right as she had a great burst of energy and love and speaking that she would die the next day and she did. I told him that she had a lot more time but he assured me it was her last great expression of life and love. As is their tradition we were silent in those hours as she began her journey, not wanting to interfere with what essentially belongs to her (and all of us). A peaceful transition into the next.

A different perspective, and one that was beautiful in its way.