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re: Are Young Men Truly Lost?
Posted on 10/1/23 at 9:50 am to Gaston
Posted on 10/1/23 at 9:50 am to Gaston
quote:
I think you’re thinking too much. Just say hi and smile…after a few meetings kick it up a notch and ask what she’s up to…want to get a coffee? Chill man, they’re humans and aren’t going to bite.
But now where do you even interact with women outside your social circle nowadays? People aren't going to bars and clubs as much anymore and while those places are okay for one night stands they really aren't the best for real relationships.
More people are working from home than ever before. Plus the workplace due to #MeToo is now off the table. Inflation and COVID have caused people to stay home more and more. Our society is built around getting everywhere by car and not by walking around. There really aren't that many places to meet the other sex organically anymore. Again statistics now show 50% of relationships start online which is a huge disadvantage for men.
Never mind that in the #MeToo age if you're attractive sure the woman won't mind if you approach. If you're even average though not only are you likely to get a no but you're risking public humiliation, getting kicked out of whatever establishment you're in and possibly even being accused of harassment. The risks of blindly approaches are far higher now.
This post was edited on 10/1/23 at 9:54 am
5
Posted on 10/1/23 at 10:20 am to OceanTiger83
quote:The answer is simple. Learn how to dance. If you live in any mid-sized to larger city there's always places to go to learn. Group lessons are the easiest and they are always short of leads (us males) And it's not hard, it really isn't. The friends over the years that listened to me and learned how have women all around them. And it doesn't matter what size/shape you are as long as you get out there and try.
But now where do you even interact with women outside your social circle nowadays?
My wife works nights and sometimes weekends as a nurse. I still go dancing when she works. My wife's two besties I met out dancing. Just last night, was dancing with our friend Heather and later this gorgeous brunette (Kay) asked me to dance with her. Made a new friend, just like that.
Posted on 10/1/23 at 10:26 am to OceanTiger83
quote:
Our society is built around getting everywhere by car and not by walking around.
Yet any push to fix this gets shite on because “muh freedom” and “muh transit brings crime”
Posted on 10/1/23 at 10:27 am to OceanTiger83
quote:
The risks of blindly approaches are far higher now.
Not trying to be a dick, but if you are so scared of a simple risk, girls will never like you. Women have always liked confidence and you obviously struggle with that. Who cares if some girl records you? Whatever, move on to the next.
Posted on 10/1/23 at 10:59 am to OceanTiger83
quote:
But now where do you even interact with women outside your social circle nowadays?
Expand your social circle. Become active at church if that's your thing. Join a social club, REC softball/kickball, professional interest club. If you're into roleplaying games, go find a local open to all DND/Pathfinder group.
Join your local rugby club. Chicks love rugby guys.
From your OP, it seems that you struggle with self confidence. (Not judging or talking shite.) Focus on improving yourself and other things will usually fall into place. Join a gym/CrossFit/MMA type gym. Don't join to try to meet women, join for yourself.
Posted on 10/1/23 at 11:01 pm to OceanTiger83
quote:
Never mind that in the #MeToo age if you're attractive sure the woman won't mind if you approach. If you're even average though not only are you likely to get a no but you're risking public humiliation, getting kicked out of whatever establishment you're in and possibly even being accused of harassment. The risks of blindly approaches are far higher now.
Either you are approaching the wrong women, have an awful approach (cringe), are incredibly awkward (which can still be attractive), or need to up your style. I have seen plenty of not very attractive young men with reasonably attractive young women. You need practice. Do you at least have a friend who is a woman?
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