re: So my daughter has received interest from an Ivy League school

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Very true, but doesn't mean it should happen. You can only shelter your kids for so long. The world will find them eventually. You've had 18 years now to raise them right. Time to let the fear go just a little and let them experience life.

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It's obvious the people in this thread who are parents of grown children, and those who are not.

What parents know is that each child is a different and unique person, and has different and unique traits, strengths, and weaknesses which have been present, though ever-developing and changing, since they popped out of the womb.

No one is suggesting that a parent should make the final decision about their child's college choice, career path, or make their opinions for them on marriage, personal choices, morals, or politics.

That doesn't mean that a parent shouldn't parent - provide guidance and insight to help their children make good choices.

Before making a decision about what university to attend, I think it's more important than ever to question the preconceived notions about what a college education is for and what are it's benefits and costs (including opportunity costs). There should be an understanding that the university caste system that is in place is in large part a well orchestrated facade where prestige is primarily based on exclusivity (partly on intelligence, but also on financial means, and social class, and a host of other preferred politically motivated minority status traits).

The question is NOT whether this man's child should be encouraged to attend Princeton or not attend Princeton. The question is whether this particular child, with all of his/her unique characteristics, should be encouraged to attend Princeton, with all that entails (costs, opportunity costs, possibly better academics, better connections FOR CERTAIN FUTURE CAREER GOALS, etc) versus attending a different university, with a different set of factors.

It is a very valid question to ask: What makes one university better than another. For me, prestige is simply not at the top of the list of important factors. Sometimes prestige is earned and sometimes it is simply assumed. Many times prestige once earned continues on long past the point where it is no longer merited. Other times prestige is slow to be granted, even though well deserved, by those who are motivated to deny inclusion in the "prestigious club".

One motivator which helps determine whether an institution will be "highly regarded" by the higher education establishment is whether that university is sufficiently progessive enough. There is simply no bigger snob than a progressive ivy league snob.

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my mom helped me out with some living expenses here or there and i felt like shite about it, and still do. i worked 4 years in undergrad and should have worked more so she didn't have to pay for anything. that was the whole reason i DIDN'T go to princeton (or a similar school in both academics and cost)

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Both of my daughters paid their own way through school. It was a source of pride with both of them. However, had they needed help with tuition or whatever, old dad would have happily pitched in. (They certain received their fair share of 20 dollar cards in the mail). But where ever they wanted to go was their choice. Not mine.

Choosing to go to college is a big damn deal and he should be proud. The fact that his kid can get into an ivy league school. Hell the frick yeah. His reasoning for not wanting her to go...pathetic.

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ETA: that's probably more like $70k

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$77K

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no it's not, did you even read the thread?

the guy came to the poli talk board literally asking us to talk him out of sending his daughter to princeton because he's scared she'll be indoctrinated by liberals

go back and read the first page. this is not an exaggeration at all

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Jimbeaux himself said this on page 1

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The liberal brain washing is pretty intense. Even smart students take years and even decades to shake it off.

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yeah going to princeton is going to mean dick if he can't afford those elite medical schools this opens her up for

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If she has any academic talent what-so-ever...the money will be there through scholarships grants etc.

and if not...she probably shouldn't be a doctor anyway.

I knew a lot of pre-med majors when I went to school.

Very few of them ended up as doctors.

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Jimbeaux himself said this on page 1


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The liberal brain washing is pretty intense. Even smart students take years and even decades to shake it off.

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That was a light hearted jab, early in the thread, but it's not without merit.

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the guy came to the poli talk board literally asking us to talk him out of sending his daughter to princeton because he's scared she'll be indoctrinated by liberals

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And I'm saying it is absolutely appropriate to consider what kind of educational experience you are going to be exposed to from one college to the next. If his kid is being considered by Princeton, then maybe just maybe there are other quality schools that would also be interested.

The prestige of Princeton can be weighed against the prestige of Duke or Wake Forest for example, along with other factors.
Considering

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And I'm saying it is absolutely appropriate to consider what kind of educational experience you are going to be exposed to from one college to the next. If his kid is being considered by Princeton, then maybe just maybe there are other quality schools that would also be interested.

The prestige of Princeton can be weighed against the prestige of Duke or Wake Forest for example, along with other factors.
Considering

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Nobody has said otherwise

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If that's what they wanted to do with their lives then why is your input necessary?

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I always reserve the right to intervene should I see my kids going down I path I think is wrong. Of course we have a good relationship and I tell them that this is my opinion, but it is ultimately their decision. I also tell them that there are boundaries to what we'll pay for, but that we'll support them no matter what path they choose. I'm a parent, my job is not to be an unconditional friend.

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If that's what they wanted to do with their lives then why is your input necessary?

My oldest changed majors once in school. (From architecture to graphic art). Did I think it was the right decision at the time? Nope. But if her heart wasn't in the first major why am I going to try to influence her to study something that she would hate to spend the rest of her life doing. You get one life. If you choose a career in something you detest, you aren't going to do it well or long. Then, it will be a waste of money.

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So, asurob, did your daughter ask for your input before she made this decision? If she had, then I must assume based on your ridiculous posturing, that you would have told her, "No, daughter, I will not tell you my thoughts on the matter. You simply have to make these life-changing decisions based on your own limited understanding of the world."