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In new book Cat In The Hat gives kids puberty blockers while their mother isn’t home

Posted on 3/5/21 at 1:53 pm
Posted by Crimson Wraith
Member since Jan 2014
24724 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 1:53 pm
BB

Things have changed quite a bit in the world of Dr. Seuss, as six of his works have been pulled from publication, banned from sale on eBay, and eliminated from people’s minds using lobotomies to help fight the threat of racism. To get with the times, though, a new Dr. Seuss book has been released, called The Cat in the Hat (He/Him).

“In this new book, using reworked art from Dr. Seuss,” said a letter from Dr. Seuss’s estate, “the Cat in the Hat once again finds the two children home alone and bored. This time he diagnoses their malaise as gender dysphoria and proceeds to give the children puberty blockers.”

An excerpt from the book reads:

"I have some new drugs,"
said the cat in the hat.
"A lot of good drugs!
I'll inject them in you.
Your mother will not mind at all if I do."

The children learn a lesson in intolerance, too, as their goldfish ignorantly tries to stop them from taking the drugs, warning them of permanent side effects. The goldfish is then killed and flushed down a toilet.

Numerous drag queens will be deployed to libraries across the country to perform free readings of the book to children.

Posted by teke184
Zachary, LA
Member since Jan 2007
94858 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 1:54 pm to
Why do I have a feeling that Audrey Geisel would be on board with that change?
Posted by Comic_Tiger
Member since Jul 2020
1277 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 1:57 pm to
BB just keeps churning out hit after hit.
Posted by Kafka
I am the moral conscience of TD
Member since Jul 2007
141660 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 1:58 pm to
quote:

BB
why do you give away the punch line right off the bat?

the whole point is to post a BB story w/o credit. then people will think, "well this is insane, but the way things are going now, it could be real."
Posted by RemouladeSawce
Uranus
Member since Sep 2008
13912 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 2:01 pm to
The Bee is really putting out incredible work these days
Posted by midnight_chopper
Member since Mar 2018
637 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 2:24 pm to
quote:

The Bee is really putting out incredible work these days


I feel like they have to spin these stories out faster in order to stay ahead of the absurdity.

Posted by BugAC
St. George
Member since Oct 2007
52764 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 2:29 pm to
Posted by LSUSkip
Central, LA
Member since Jul 2012
17527 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 2:48 pm to
quote:

The Bee is really putting out incredible work these days


It's not like they have to try too hard. Everything happening at this point in time would be comical just 10 years ago. They're just taking a time machine 10 years into the future and bringing material back with them.
Posted by Bowhanon 87
Member since Jan 2021
184 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 3:00 pm to
That book retake sounds creepy AF.
Posted by VBFlorida
Florida
Member since Nov 2020
1337 posts
Posted on 3/5/21 at 3:40 pm to
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