re: My bulldog has stopped eating

Damn. Mine had cancer. Her lymph nodes were the size of a grapefruit. She was still up and moving around, but I made the call to take her while she was still herself. Very hard.

quote:

---

The Last Battle.
If it should be that I grow frail and weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then will you do what must be done,
For this -- the last battle -- can't be won.
You will be sad I understand,
But don't let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
You wouldn't want me to suffer so.
When the time comes, please, let me go.
Take me to where to my needs they'll tend,
Only, stay with me till the end
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
It is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don't grieve that it must be you
Who has to decide this thing to do; We've been so close -- we two -- these years,
Don't let your heart hold any tears.

---

Dammit

He ended up lasting a few more days, I couldn't do it last night with the wife home.

Sent her to the store when I got home today and took care of it.

Old guy wouldn't stand up anymore, but I walked over to him. Patted his head, and he seemed to know.

He tried to stand and couldn't, so I helped him to his feet. He took everything he had and walked through the house, walked out the front door, stumbled down the steps, and walked to the grave I had dug. He laid down next to it on the blanket and lost consciousness.

Gave the old guy a last few pets and told him bye. A few seconds later it was finished.

As I was burying him, my phone opened pandora in my pocket and started playing music. For whom the bell tolls, by metallic. Helluva outro.

9 years. Two house. Four cars. Five or six other dogs. He's been there through it all. He was born 6 days before my wife and I started dating, and it's going to be odd not having him.

Call me a wuss, but I have that pain running from the back of my eyes, through my jaw, and down my neck that only happens when a man does everything he can not to cry.