re: Write A Story Using OT Posters As Characters In The Story

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congrats?

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People love me more than they admit.

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I never look for or want pity

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I respect that, and people should give you credit for it

At least you didn’t say messican

That would be thousands

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At least you didn’t say messican

That would be thousands

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youre not smart is you?

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.. he used up all his pity from being a linguini legged cripple long ago by being a terrible, Boring, long winded with zero point shitposter long ago.

Some people take their handicaps and become better people because of the struggle.

OwheelO double and quadrupled down on being awful and wrong, in Quantity, literally all the time.

And not even the kind of wrong that makes a good protagonist where they are fun to hate.

More like an unkillable fly that just constantly buzzes around and annoys everyone and shits on everything.

Plus he’s a pussy who won’t even back his shite up when he’s challenged.

Thunderdome...

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Goodness, that is quite a melt right there.

Well done.

I am the short bus rider you speak of ain’t I?

As Tiger Fans Sign On: An OT Soap Opera

“INTRODUCTIONS” – PART 1 of 3

---It all started with a thread on Tigerdroppings.com (TD) titled “What are you doing for New Years Eve?” Meatloaf and Terd had just moved their newly married asses back into Baton Rouge, and being fed up with unpacking boxes Meatloaf decided it’d be good for both Terd and her to hang out with old college friends for New Years Eve.
---“Hanging out with old friends.” She typed in the thread.
---A handful of minutes later, in other parts of Baton Rouge Meatloaf’s old acquaintances: Grrrl, BBMcGee, and Beefer signed onto Tigerdroppings and read her post. In that thread she got replies from them and they all decided to celebrate the end of 2011 and beginning of 2012 at Happy’s.
---“You know what?” Meat said to Terd, “You should go hang out with your old college buds, GtG and Maximus for New Year’s Eve. And since Hulk is here too, why don’t you bring your brother along as well?”
---“You’re not the boss of me, whore! He shot back. Well, actually, that’s a good idea. I’ll figure out something.”
---They will be going to Boudreaux and Thibodeaux’s only a block away from Happy’s.

New Year’s Eve – 10:00pm

---Meatloaf was checking TD on her phone when Grrrl and Beefer walked up together. They exchanged hugs and greetings. Beefer explained how she had to drag Grrrl to the bar, because this isn’t her cup of tea. Grrrl shot back with something like, “Beefer, you don’t even drink. Don’t talk to me about cup of tea.”
---They only had to wait two more minutes for BBMcGee to arrive. She came running at them from the direction of Boudreaux and Thibodeaux’s with a bounce in her step, and therefore a bounce in her boobs, and a huge smile on her face.
---“OMG guys! It’s so great to see you. Guess what? GtG just proposed to me right in the parking lot! This looks so awesome, right?” She blurts out showing the ring to her friends.
---Congratulations were shared. Grrrl grew a little more depressed. They went into Happy’s. mostly happy.


---Meanwhile, Terd and Hulk sat at the bar drinking beer as they waited on the terrible twosome that was GtG and Max to arrive. While there they spotted and talked to Brag and Berg who were dropping shots left and right. Every so often a “More shots!” Would ring out from somewhere in the bar. They were getting drunk, and they wanted others to get drunk with them. Others usually obliged.
---“Man of the fricking hour right here!” Max blurted out as he pushed GtG into the barroom. My bud GtG just proposed to his girl! It’s going to be a great New Years!” Glasses were lifted and a “Hooray!” rang out.
---In the celebration GtG turned to Max and said, “You’re acting a little weird man.”
---“Calm down, just I wanted to show my support for you.” Max explained.
---They worked their way over to Terd and after saying hello and congratulating GtG, he introduced them to Hulk.
---“Congratulations, GtG.” Hulk said.

---While BBMcGee was ordering 3 drinks at the bar (on Meat’s tab of course) she spotted a guy sitting by himself perusing TD on his phone. Once she got the drinks she went back to her friends at the table she decided - and it might have been how the night was going or it might have been because it was New Year’s Eve - but she decided to push Grrrl to do something.
---“Grrrl, see that guy sitting down over there on the right side of the bar? He’s on TD right now. You should go talk to him. Ask him which poster he is.” She suggested.
---“What’s the point? Nothing’s going to work out like usual.” Grrrl mumbled.
---“Oh come on. Just do it. What do you have to lose?” BBMcGee fired back.
---With some added encouragement from her friends she finally got up from the table and approached the TD mobile user.
---“Hey, so you post on TD?” Grrrl asked looking over her shoulder.
---He quickly put his phone down and spun around in his barstool. Laughingly he said, “I guess you caught me, and I suppose you post too?”
---What Grrrl saw surprised her. He was a handsome fellow with a nice face and features she finds attractive. She could feel something in her brain go off. Almost like a Hmm.... It took her a second to snap back to reality, “Err, what’s your username?”
---“You can’t just ask someone their username right off the bat. You have to get to know them first.” He said.
---“Ok then, what do I call you?” She asked.
---“You can call me Greg.”
---“Well, Greg...” She said as she walked to the barstool beside him, “I’m Grrrl. Tell me a little about yourself.” She sat down.
---On the other side of the barroom her friends were celebrating for her.

---“Brag and Berg are so crazy! Look how they’ve made this place go nuts.” Terd said, impressed.
---“Wait, that gives me an idea, we should rank the people in the bar on how influential they are!” GtG said.
---“I don’t know, man.” Hulk replied. “Ranking is subjective. What if I find someone more influential than you find them to be? We should just find our own favorite people and not talk about it. We’re all part of the bar we are all contributing, there shouldn’t be a ranking.”
---“Hulk, are you voicing your opinion on the Tier rating system that I devised on TD in that response?” GtG asked.
---“Yes. I am.” Hulk affirmed.
---“Man, enough of this cerebral nonsense! My boy is getting married!” Max interrupted. “My boy, my best bud. Married. Wow. Still blows my mind.”
---“You’re still acting pretty weird, dude.” GtG truthfully joked.
---“Whatever. I have to take a piss. I’ll be back. You guys knock yourselves out.” Max replied. As he left he ordered another beer for GtG. “That’s for the newly engaged guy over there.”

---“Holy crap! Grrrl is really chatting that guy up! We aren’t going to get quality friend time because of her success!” Meat laughed, happy for her friend.
---“Ok, I gotta tinkle.” You ladies let me know if anything happened when I get back.” BBMcGee said as she got up from the table.
---At the bar Grrrl was really warming up to this “Greg” guy. She already asked him again about his TD username. He still didn’t tell her.
---“OK, Greg, I think it’s time you meet my friends.” They got up from the bar and she grabbed his hand and dragged him over to their table.
---“Hey Grrrl,” Her friends said in unison as she brought the guy over there.
---“Hello girls!” she said back. This is Greg and he’s on TD too.”

---BBMcGee stumbled over to the bathroom and saw the long line. She asked the last person in line, who happened to be Madamesquirrel, “How long have you been waiting?”
---“Long enough that my older loins can’t stand this long of a wait. I think a better option would be going outside.” She advised.
---BBMcGee turned around bumping into the wall and proceeded to pinball her way to the front of the bar and out into the street. She knew there was a bathroom between Happy’s and Boudreax and Thibodeax’s somewhere...
---Max had the same long line in his bar so he took his heavilybuzzed self out to the bathrooms he knew were towards Happy’s.

Do you see where this is going?

---At five minutes to midnight BBMcGee and Maximus - one newly engaged and one the best friend of the engaged - converged on each other’s position at the bathrooms between both bars. This being a soap opera and being that both are drunk, something had to happen here. Now that all the introductions are out the way, we get to mess it up a bit. So this is when life starts to gets complicated for all of them.

Ready?

“COPULATION” – PART 2 of 3

---It was looking bad, when the score was 15-0, so much so she had to do something else to keep her from watching the beating going down during the BCSNCG.
---BBMcGee was at Meat and Terd’s house with GtG, her fiancé. All the boxes were unpacked now, and the interior looked pretty organized.
---“I have to go get some air,” she said while standing up and putting down her beer. GtG slapped her butt as she sidled out between the couch and coffee table.
---On her way to the front door a text message made her phone vibrate. She pulled it out of her tight jeans to read it, “Can you believe this massacre?” It read. It was from Maximus. BBMcGee stared at the text for some time contemplating if she should or shouldn’t entertain Maximus. She thought about what sort of moral lines she would be breaking if not now, further down the road. Then she thought back to the kiss at the Port-o-Potty, and with that sensation she made her decision.
---“You aren’t kidding.” She sent back. She went further, “Where are you at?”
---Maximus replied, “At the bar. You should come.” It was probably too forward, because BBMcGee decided not to respond to that one.

---Back in the living room GtG stood up as BBMcGee reentered. “Hey, I think I’m done watching the game. I don’t want to put myself through this anymore.”
---Terd and Meatloaf were tuckering out from all the alcohol they consumed trying to ease the pain. Almost on cue to indicate their level of drunkenness, Terd said something innocently: “I can’t feel my toes.”
---Then Meatloaf, being herself, said “Suck ‘em.”
---Terd then shot back, “How can I suck my own toes?” He then pulled off his sock and tried to push his foot into Meatloaf’s mouth. “You suck the toes!” Terd demanded.
---Meatloaf gave him a saucy look. “You know that’s only a Thursday thing.”
---“Okay. And with that, I’m outta here. BB, I can drop you off at your place.” GtG suggested.
---“Fine.” She said. Meatloaf begged them to stay, she was livening up while Terd was passing out.
---Meatloaf and BBMcGee lined up plans to go out to drink off the loss once BB changed clothes at her place.

---Since New Year’s Eve, Grrrl and Greg had been out on 2 dates. One was a nice walk and talk on the levee (they held hands), and the next was at Painting with a Twist. They were watching the BCSNCG together at The Bulldog. Tino and TigahRag were there. They were a bit drunk and hitting on their waiter, Rjone15. Oh, and Beefer was there. She was Grrrl and Greg’s third wheel. Beefer drank water while everyone else drank Shiner Bock.
---Near the end of the game the crowd started getting sparse. Despite the loss, Grrrl had a nice time with Greg; now on her third date. She went to the bathroom and checked in with Meatloaf via text, and she learned that Meatloaf and BBMcGee were headed her way after a while.
---Out of boredom she asked Greg again what his TD.com username was, he still didn’t tell her. His response: “Why does it matter so much?”
---In all reality, it sort of developed into a flirtation between the two. Case and point:
---“Well, I want to know who I’m dealing with.” She answered.
---“What do you mean, who you’re dealing with?” Greg asked.
---“You’ll see. Here, let me get us some shots and maybe we can communicate better.” She spouted off flirtatiously.
---While Grrrl got up, Beefer was on her phone reading a thread on TD. It was titled, “You don’t have as much game as you think you do.” Hulk wrote it probably because he was trying to get the BCSNCG out of his mind too. The thesis statement of the post was as follows, “Just because you can pick up drunk chicks doesn’t mean you have ‘game’.”

---At The Bulldog in about an hour this was about to be put into practice (foreshadowing).

---“What took you so long, BBMcGee?” Meatloaf asked, surprised it took her almost-next-door-neighbor that long to get changed and get back to her house.
---“Nuffin.” BBMcGee said.
---“Well while you were taking forever, I went ahead and notified the gang about our meet up.” They drove to The Bulldog.
---They arrived as a hiccupping Grrrl was leading a loopy Greg out of the bar.
---“Where are you guys going?” BBMcGee asked.
---“We’re going for a walk. Another walk. Just a walk.” Grrrl spouted out.
---BBMcGee and Meatloaf laughed and went into The Bulldog to sit with Beefer.
---Meatloaf struck up a deal with BBMcGee where she would sober up so BBMcGee could drink. BBMcGee obliged. Three Long Island iced teas later trouble was lurking in the corner, because that was about the time that Maximus walked in.
---“Well, hello ladies.” He said, only looking at BBMcGee.
---“Hey, Max,” they all answered.
---“Where is everyone?” He inquired.
---They explained how Grrrl had run off with Greg to go on a “walk”. And Terd and GtG were asleep, worn out from the loss. Maximus then made it his duty to make sure that the girls forgot about the game, so he wanted to show them a fun time.

---Time elapse scene in word form: Blah de blah. Drink drink drink. Dance music. Blah de blah. Maximus eyes BBMcGee. BBMcGee eyes Maximus. Blah blah blah.

---Beefer and Max were really getting dirty on the “dance floor” as Meatloaf and BBMcGee were dancing. BBMcGee, pretty drunk now, then put down her beer bottle and almost spilled it all over the table. She stumbled towards the bathroom. Fortunately the place was so empty that there were no lines for this bathroom!
---Maximus spied BBMcGee’s bathroomward movement out the corner of his eye and right on cue the song ended, so he ditched Beefer for the bathroom, like every guy would. Meatloaf walked up to Beefer and they danced when the next song kicks in.
---Maximus arrived to the bathroom door right as BBMcGee exited. “Hey, we need to talk about the other night…New Year’s Eve.”
---“Do we?” She said, and slaps his shoulder playfully.
---“Yeah, I was thinking about…”
---BBMcGee interrupted him, “We were talking about you tonight after the game.”.
---“Really?” He said, “Wait, who’s we?”
---“Me and my vibrator.” With that she pulled him into the girl’s room and locked the door.

---Grrrl had acquired a snuggie from the trunk of her car. She carried it under one arm as she led Greg with the other towards the lakes. In her mind she kept count of that being the second time they held hands. She was determined to get further than that tonight.
---Once she reached the foot of the lake Grrrl spread out the snuggie to make a ground cover of sorts and sat down then pulled Greg to sit next to her. She saw Greg was smiling as he crouched down to be at her level.
---“You know it’s weird,” She wondered, “All the weather reports said it was supposed to be raining now, and it’s not.” She said.
---“That is interesting, because now we have a full moon to look at.” Greg said.
---“Well, I think we won’t look at it the whole time.” Grrrl shot back.
---“Yeah, I know.” Greg confidently replied. And with that Greg leaned in and kissed Grrrl.
---A few seconds, (but were they seconds?), later Grrrl felt him put his hand on her shoulder and draw her in closer. They started to make out.
---Holding hands two times…eat your heart out. She thought.