re: Why do trashy people hate being told to calm down?

Their parents raised them wrong and they have trouble with filtering their thoughts from their words. If it's not causing a huge problem, they are able to learn from calmer people who exhibit traits their parents never taught them.

I had an employee that was always on edge with no filter and felt every correction was an attack on her. We let her vent and would act like nothing happened. She would witness is correcting other employees with better manners and after about 6 months she calmed down and changes her behavior to reflect a more professional manner.