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re: When did your wife change?

Posted on 12/20/18 at 12:03 pm to
Posted by tiger91
In my own little world
Member since Nov 2005
36744 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 12:03 pm to
quote:

If you're on the verge of being an empty nester, that's usually way tougher on her, at least overtly, than you as well.


This is where we are — two sons moved out earlier this year and she graduates in May and is headed out of state for college. My spouse is ready. I’m so not. Adjustments will be needed for sure. How do you go from 27 years of having children everywhere to just two??
Posted by tigerfoot
Alexandria
Member since Sep 2006
56505 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 12:32 pm to
That’s a start
Posted by shawnlsu
Member since Nov 2011
23682 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 1:31 pm to
quote:

Luckily, the OB put her on some meds


I guess I'd trust the guys over in the outdoor board more than the OT, but still......
Posted by Modern
Fiddy Men
Member since May 2011
16880 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 1:37 pm to
My wife is slowly turning into her mom. Not appearance wise but i can see it in her ways.

And I’ve already completely turned into my dad.

My sister (no pics) pointed it out to me a while back, when I was fussing at my son at her house.


Scary but funny at the same time.
Posted by mmmmmbeeer
ATL
Member since Nov 2014
7443 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 1:41 pm to
quote:


And I’ve already completely turned into my dad.


I catch so much hell about this, myself.

Funniest commercial airing these days is the Geico commercial about how the dude turned into his dad after saving 15% on car insurance.

"$10 cover. Huh. Didn't see that on the website"
Posted by brian_wilson
Member since Oct 2016
3581 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 2:20 pm to
quote:

Age 37. Love her to death but what a chapter right now....


When my wife and I were 30, we went through a rough patch. Our therapist told us to read a john gottham book. It changed our marriage for the better.

LINK

I highly recommend this book!
Posted by tiger91
In my own little world
Member since Nov 2005
36744 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 2:52 pm to
What if he won't read it and doesn't know how or want to communicate?
Posted by danilo
Member since Nov 2008
20271 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 3:03 pm to
quote:

After we moved into her dream house. She is/was constantly looking for her next instant gratification.

Some people are never happy
Posted by Tester1216
South Louisiana
Member since Jul 2018
22149 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 3:07 pm to
quote:

Some people are never happy



Very true.

Some people know only misery, humiliation and sadness, its whats most familiar to them. If I had to guess, this person was abused in someway as a child.
Posted by Brisketeer
Texas
Member since Aug 2013
1442 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 3:10 pm to
At exactly age 37, after 13 years of marriage - now ex wife.
Posted by BoogaBear
Member since Jul 2013
5611 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 3:12 pm to
This is exactly my about to be ex wife. Definitely has the borderline personality disorder, as does her mother. Her folks divorced at an early age, her mom used the kid against her dad. Barely saw dad, mom stayed in bed all day with fibromialgia or however you spell that fake shite.

Once life slowed down she changed, life was a sprint. Graduate, new job, new house, had kid 1, built dream house, had kid 2. Life slowed, she started her downward spiral looking for something.

Did everything I could and more to keep it together, but you can't fix people.
Posted by EveryonesACoach
Baton Rouge
Member since Nov 2012
864 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 3:29 pm to
quote:

The day she got pregnant. We've been glorified roommates ever since. Girls just turned two last week. Mine are 2 and 3. We're basically in a not-for-profit business partnership at this point, but it's getting better. It doesn't help that she works full-time and I work full-time plus a couple side jobs. That adds more of the burden at home to her. It ain't easy



This really makes me sad.

I know it’s hard but you’ve got to make your marriage a priority. When the kids leave you’ll have NOTHING ago take about and you’ll be living with a stranger.


THIS. Mine are 4, 2 and 2. Married 7 years, in our early thirties, so maybe not quite the time put in some other posters have. But we make sure when we do have some down time, we spend it doing things together. I feel our relationship has grown stronger in certain ways because the limited free time is more focused than before we had kids. We make it a priority to stay intimate a couple times a week, but only after spending some time together, that way we're not just going through the motions to get our jollies in. Sitting on the same sofa in front of the TV staring at different phones is not quality time. It takes effort, but if your spouse is truly your best friend the pros of that effort should far outweigh the cons for the both of you.
Posted by brian_wilson
Member since Oct 2016
3581 posts
Posted on 12/20/18 at 5:10 pm to
quote:

What if he won't read it and doesn't know how or want to communicate?


Divorce?
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