re: Thank Missouri for Ending WWI, WWII, and the Cold War.

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a mountain range

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Let's not go overboard.

But, yeah, Missouri isn't a bad place to live. But I can't say I have any great desire to live there again. Too many other interesting options.

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For frick's sake, Missouri has two of the largest rivers in the United States running through it

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That doesn't afford you culture.

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mountain range

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The highest point is 1700 feet. If that constitutes a legit mountain or mountain range to you, I don't know what to say.

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two major metropolitan areas

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Most states have at least 1-2 major metro areas.

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St. Louis alone has enough culture for an entire state

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What's the culture of St. Louis? Or in other words, when someone says, I'm going to visit St. Louis for a week, what are the immediate cultural highlights that come to mind? Some jazz, I grant you. I guess there's the beer. But I wouldn't say that St. Louis offers any more significant culture than any other large city in the US like Charlotte, Jacksonville, Columbus, OH or Providence, RI.

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I will go out on a limb and further assume you are one of those frickheads that thinks New Orleans

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You sure mention New Orleans a lot. Funny, I don't remember mentioning New Orleans once. I don't live in Louisiana and never recall knighting for it or saying it was the most significant city in the world. But I will say that New Orleans is more culturally significant than any place in the state of Missouri.

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states like Texas have nothing to offer.

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Wrong again. I studied history for too long in undergrad and graduate courses to underrate the history and value of Texas to our nation's history.

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I hope you continue to bury your head in the fricking New Orleans muck in which it currently resides and keep your pretentious arse out of the rest of the United States.

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Again, you come off as really stupid assuming I have some love affair with the city of New Orleans. It's funny that you make this assumption. I've never lived there before and I don't live there now. But I have visited 48 states and lived in every region of the United States at one point or time and I can tell you this:

New Orleans culture trumps Missouri culture.

mkibod1

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Goodness... gloat much?

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As Love said, it's my M.O. What can I say?

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That doesn't afford you culture.

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Never said it did, shite-for-brains. You said:

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there's zero topographical diversity

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I gave you two of the biggest rivers in the United States, a mountain range (they are, after all, called the Ozark Mountains), farmland, and quarries, and I'll give you another one: giant fricking lakes.

So, you're incorrect as to your point about topographical diversity. Next.

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It's thousands of miles from the nearest beach

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... K? And? So is Denver. And Chicago. And Salt Lake City. And, you know, a huge portion of the fricking country. Next.

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Missouri is the blandest, most boring, culturally devoid state in the union

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And before that you have the balls to say "No offense." Go frick yourself. You have offended, purposefully, every native Missourian with your completely nonsensical statements.

I combated this notion by pointing to the fact that it has two major metro areas that are distinct from each other, that Missouri is steeped in history, and that St. Louis has enough culture for one state.

You ask: "What's the culture of St. Louis?" I'll educate you.

St. Louis "culture," if you don't know much about it, includes an intense passion for sports and particularly the Cardinals; Anheuser Busch and the bajillion microbreweries that currently make very good beer (it is a drinking city); several historical landmarks like Laclede's Landing, the Arch, the St. Louis Basilica, Forest Park, The Fabulous Fox Theater, the MUNY, etc.; great live music including street musicians, local bands, nationally touring bands, and the seemingly ageless Chuck Berry, as well as having a historic influence on rock and roll, jazz, and blues; ragtime was invented in St. Louis (as was the hotdog); it is home to a critically acclaimed zoo, museums, and symphony orchestra (winner of 6 grammys); it is filled with an easy-going mentality perpetuated by its predominantly working middle class residents who are genuinely kind to strangers, even if they are Cubs fans; it has its own pizza style, BBQ style, and desserts; it is home to Italians, Germans, Irish, and French; it is hugely Catholic; the Hill produces some of the more unique and tasty Italian food in America; recently it has seen an influx of Bosnian refugees and they have integrated their culture with St. Louis'; it has a unique architecture characterized by red brick; it has Soulard and the Delmar Loop and downtown Clayton and Kirkwood; it is the home of St. Louis Bread Company (better known as Panera bread); it is quintessentially American while being unique unto itself.

Next.

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Most states have at least 1-2 major metro areas

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I didn't say it had 1-2 major metro areas. I said it had 2. California, Texas, Tennessee, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Florida are the only other states I can think with two or more distinct major metro areas.

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You sure mention New Orleans a lot.

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I mentioned it once and I mentioned it because you appear to be similarly minded to the many New Orleanians who come on here and spout off about the wonderful culture that New Orleans has while shitting on every other state's or city's culture.

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I studied history for too long in undergrad and graduate courses to underrate the history and value of Texas to our nation's history.

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Then it was a poor assumption on my part. But again, you sounded like the hundreds of other New Orleans natives who post on here every time a comparison between New Orleans and any other place comes up (scroll back about 5 pages, I'm sure you'll find one) who have never left the confines of their fair city and yet pretend to know what it is like anywhere else in the nation (or world).

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Again, you come off as really stupid assuming I have some love affair with the city of New Orleans. It's funny that you make this assumption.

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I did qualify it as "going out on a limb," did I not? And you say "again" as if I have commented on your love affair with New Orleans in the past. I had not and have not. Yet again, all the telltale symptoms of you being an OTer from New Orleans are there, so I, admittedly, made a logical leap.

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But I have visited 48 states and lived in every region of the United States

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And "visiting" makes you an authority on the culture of a place? Living in the Midwest makes you an authority on Missouri? Are you so daft as to compare Minnesota to Oklahoma? Or Kansas to Michigan? Now who sounds stupid?

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New Orleans culture trumps Missouri culture.

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This is purely opinion and undermines what you first set out to accomplish: to claim that Missouri is "devoid of culture." Well, dumbass, you just admitted Missouri has culture. Congratulations.

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Finally, it's not just my opinion that feels New Orleans culture trumps Missouri culture. If you submitted the question to 1,000 random people in the United States and the rest of the world, which would you rather visit- New Orleans or Missouri, which do you think 95% of the respondents would choose?

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Didn't say they wouldn't. It's still based in opinion. And regardless, you miss the point, which is that Missouri is not "devoid of culture."

(And just to give you a little more food for thought: as of 2010, St. Louis received $4.20B in tourism dollars per year; as of 2011, New Orleans received $5.47B; St. Louis hosts 21M visitors every year; New Orleans hosted 8.75M in 2011; so someone obviously wants to visit Missouri, even if they are people from other "fly-over" states).

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So you can't see this objectively and observe what everyone else outside your state sees- that Missouri is perceived as a boring, flat, fly-over state.

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O I understand that Missouri is not the most exciting state in the nation to most people, just like I know Louisiana isn't and neither is Arkansas. I also know that this is still rooted in opinion. For an avid bird hunter, I would imagine Missouri, Arkansas and Louisiana are paradise. For me, I would like nothing more than to park my arse in California assuming money were no object.

But more importantly, I know that what you initially posted, that Missouri is the "blandest, most boring, culturally devoid state in the union" is so far from the truth that it only took me pointing out the merits of St. Louis, one of two major cities located within Missouri, to prove you wrong.

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The thing about state pride is that it's a lot like family pride. No one thinks they or their family is dumb and no thinks they or their family is ugly.

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I have no issue stating that my cousins are stupid and their children are ugly. I have no issue acknowledging that Missouri is far from perfect. For one thing, it's got a hell of a Meth problem and has had for over a decade.

What I take issue with is someone who has spent so little time in Missouri that he had to google maps Hayti, Missouri, to sound educated on the subject. What I take issue with is, again, that you didn't say "Yeah, Missouri's kind of interesting, but I'd rather live in X." You said Missouri is the a-hole of America. Well, you're incorrect. You're the a-hole of America.

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You don't mean that.

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No. But it was a good turn of phrase, I thought.

...and what's funny is that we're just talking about St. Louis culture. We haven't moved discussion to Kansas City, Hannibal (Mark Twain/Mississippi River lore), Columbia, nor the 3rd largest metropolitan statistical area in Missouri - Springfield/Branson/Joplin (nearly 1 million MSA).

Haven't discussed Missouri's role in the French and Indian War, Revolutionary War, War of 1812, and Civil War.

Haven't discussed just how large the state actually is in terms of area nor the diverse topography and scenic charms.

Not to mention the OP is factual, tongue-n-cheek or not.


Yeah, we're a large flat nothingness devoid of culture and history.

I'm originally from Louisiana and have lived the last twenty years in Missouri, and I can say without any doubt that the people are far more honest, educated, hospitable, clean, and far less backward than any place in Louisiana.

With the exception of a few downtown areas of the two major cities, Missourians' quality of life compared to that of Louisiana residents is like comparing a first world country to a third world country.

Also, the women up here are much more attractive and more mentally healthy than the rats back in Louisiana. I do not regret relocating to Missouri one iota, and the only thing really holding back this state at the moment is the atrocious economy.

Ghost, NoName's statement is accurate. But don't get all rustled. I've seen a few hotties in Louisiana, and they have sort of an exotic flavor which is nice. Two or three hotties is better than zero like College Station.