Taken from a gardening forum for your enjoyment

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poop where they're supposed to, zero issues with them.

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dump all over a human inhabited area. They will literally avoid most the space in my back yard and front yard dedicated to nature and pick the small paved areas and particularly the areas that we humans walk over the most... as if they're doing it on purpose to show us who's really boss.

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Florida, or San Francisco?

Your sig pic is worse than any lizard shite. Dick cancer is better than that sig pic and quote.

And a "gardening forum"? That just screams old queer.

Get over it and quit acting like a whiny little girl

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Vlad June 7, 2018, 5:32 PM Another Floridian here. Have to admit that I got a bit ticked off while reading the beginning of this thread just like the other Floridian did. Some people here think that just because the breed of lizard prevalent in their state/city is well mannered and doesn't poop all over their stuff in droves then it can't happen to other people elsewhere. Well let me tell you something, here it Florida we have these chunky little curly tail lizards who can't be described as anything other than predatory poopers. The little bastards love nothing more than to take steamy little lizard dump all over a human inhabited area. They will literally avoid most the space in my back yard and front yard dedicated to nature and pick the small paved areas and particularly the areas that we humans walk over the most... as if they're doing it on purpose to show us who's really boss. It's really messed up... The local green lizards poop where they're supposed to, zero issues with them. Even the giant green iguanas know their place. But these invasive brown curly tail lizards from the Caribbean are massive anti-human a-holes. I am tired of sweeping up their crap every time I want to use the patio and dodging their tiny shits each time I leave home through the front yard. If anyone has suggestions for how I can keep them in the grassy areas and off the pavement, or better yet how I can give them a serious case of constipation I am all ears.

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This whole thing. I can't tell if it's satire, thinly-veiled racism, or a serious complaint about brown lizards.

I'm officially through the looking glass. Everything is real, and nothing is real.