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1
Posted on 9/25/14 at 8:04 am to rballa19
hahahaha 
I was like damn thats big, damn thats big, dayum we small. Then...
Thought it was going to be a pluto joke.
I was like damn thats big, damn thats big, dayum we small. Then... Thought it was going to be a pluto joke.
This post was edited on 9/25/14 at 8:06 am
Posted on 9/25/14 at 8:11 am to Hu_Flung_Pu
why dont jews like blowjobs?
it's too close to the gas chamber
it's too close to the gas chamber
Posted on 9/25/14 at 8:12 am to Hu_Flung_Pu
A rabbi and a priest are standing on a corner and see a little boy bending over to tie his shoe. The priest says to the rabbi “man, id really like to screw that kid”. The rabbi asks “out of what?”
Posted on 9/25/14 at 8:31 am to WeeWee
A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son..
They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, 'What are these, Dad?'
To which the man matter-of-factly replies, 'Those are called condoms, son.
Men use them to have safe sex.''
Oh I see,' replied the boy.' Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school.'
He looks over the display and picks up a Package of 3 and asks, 'Why are there 3 in this package?'
The dad replies, 'Those are for high schoolboys, one for Friday, one for Saturday, and one for Sunday.
'Cool' says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks, 'Then who are these for?'
Those are for college men,' the dad answers, 'TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday and TWO for Sunday.'
'WOW!' exclaimed the boy, 'then who uses THESE?' he asks, picking up a 12 Pack.
With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied, 'Those are for Married men. One for January, one for February, one for March........'
They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, 'What are these, Dad?'
To which the man matter-of-factly replies, 'Those are called condoms, son.
Men use them to have safe sex.''
Oh I see,' replied the boy.' Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school.'
He looks over the display and picks up a Package of 3 and asks, 'Why are there 3 in this package?'
The dad replies, 'Those are for high schoolboys, one for Friday, one for Saturday, and one for Sunday.
'Cool' says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks, 'Then who are these for?'
Those are for college men,' the dad answers, 'TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday and TWO for Sunday.'
'WOW!' exclaimed the boy, 'then who uses THESE?' he asks, picking up a 12 Pack.
With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied, 'Those are for Married men. One for January, one for February, one for March........'
Posted on 9/25/14 at 8:55 am to WeeWee
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the Fresh Prince.
You look for the Fresh Prince.
Posted on 9/25/14 at 9:34 am to BOSCEAUX
An attractive woman walks into a bar and orders a double entendre.
The bartender gives it to her.
The bartender gives it to her.
Posted on 9/25/14 at 10:00 am to jose canseco
Ha
Posted on 9/25/14 at 10:01 am to BOSCEAUX
A 0 walks up to an 8 and says nice belt you skinny count.
Posted on 9/25/14 at 12:33 pm to BOSCEAUX
How do you recognize a leper at a party?
The guests are dipping chips in his back
The guests are dipping chips in his back
Posted on 9/25/14 at 1:00 pm to kook
A man walks into a pet store and sees a bullfrog for sale for $1500.
He asks the clerk "why the frog is so expensive?"
The clerk tells him that "the frog gives the best blowjobs in the world."
After a few days of thinking about it, the man goes and buys the frog.
One afternoon the man's wife says, "I'm going out shopping for a few hours."
The man finds this to be the perfect opportunity to see if he got his money's worth.
3 hours later, the wife returns to find her husband with the frog buck naked in the kitchen and Martha White flour covering every surface in sight.
The wife exclaims, "WHAT IN THE frick HAVE YOU DONE TO MY KITCHEN? WHY IS THERE A FROG IN HERE AND WHY ARE YOU NAKED?"
The husband replies, "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT BITCH. AS SOON AS I TEACH THIS LITTLE GREEN MOTHERfrickER TO MAKE BISCUITS, YOUR arse IS GONE!"
He asks the clerk "why the frog is so expensive?"
The clerk tells him that "the frog gives the best blowjobs in the world."
After a few days of thinking about it, the man goes and buys the frog.
One afternoon the man's wife says, "I'm going out shopping for a few hours."
The man finds this to be the perfect opportunity to see if he got his money's worth.
3 hours later, the wife returns to find her husband with the frog buck naked in the kitchen and Martha White flour covering every surface in sight.
The wife exclaims, "WHAT IN THE frick HAVE YOU DONE TO MY KITCHEN? WHY IS THERE A FROG IN HERE AND WHY ARE YOU NAKED?"
The husband replies, "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT BITCH. AS SOON AS I TEACH THIS LITTLE GREEN MOTHERfrickER TO MAKE BISCUITS, YOUR arse IS GONE!"
Posted on 9/25/14 at 1:08 pm to sawfiddle
What's the deference between a Jew and a Boy Scout????
Boy Scouts come back from camp...
Boy Scouts come back from camp...
Posted on 9/25/14 at 1:14 pm to PaulBurbank007
guy is trying to sell a talking dog for $5, potential buyer goes to check it out, the dog tells him he was a bomb sniffing dog in the army and saved numerous lives in Iraq, Afg., was awarded the MoH for dogs, then was recruited by the CIA for undercover espionage and was responsible for many major drug busts in joint operations with the FBI, received a commendation from the president and recently retired, the guy says to the owner, "wow, that's amazing, what a great dog, why are you selling him for only $5?" the owner says "because he's a fricking liar, he didn't do any of that shite!"
This post was edited on 9/25/14 at 1:19 pm
Posted on 9/25/14 at 1:18 pm to 777Tiger
A penguin takes his car to the shop, and the mechanic says he needs an hour to check it out. So the penguin goes across the street to the 7-Eleven to kill some time and get an ice cream. Since the penguin has no hands, the poor little guy gets the ice cream all over his beak. He returns to the mechanic and the guy tells him, "Looks like you blew a seal." "Oh no," says the penguin, "this is just a little ice cream."
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