re: I had a friend

(no message)

I know a few people who have dealt with this in their lives. One who processed the whole situation (both his father and grandfather did this) and was able to conclude he was not ever going to do that to his son and he broke the cycle. I also know some brothers who found their dad after he killed himself when they were young teens. Both wandered into reckless lifestyles with drug use, drug dealing, and unsavory associations. Both also pulled back from that but the older brother had a lot of difficulty and wandered back and forth until he ultimately OD'd. The other turned his life around and is the pastor of the church I attend. I knew them back then and my brother and I actually tried to help his brother out but ultimately we were unsuccessful. This is a sins of the father type of situation and is very difficult to break through.

As men, we all need to think about the effect our actions can have on our kids. How our daughters interact with men and how our sons try to find their place as a man are affected by how they percieve us and what we show them.

quote:

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You may not be able to stop whats coming, but don't end up like me sitting here wondering if I could have done more.

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I know this is probably meaningless coming from this place but I do understand and, while it is good to do some self evaluation, I would say don't dwell here. No matter what you do, you will always wonder this in these situations. We are only responsible for our actions, so you can try harder to be there if you have an opportunity in the future but many times that is not enough because they cannot see clearly and you may not be the person who can make them. There may be no one that can. Still try but don't beat yourself up if things go the wrong way, at least not for too long.