Have you ever witnessed or been in a physical altercation at Christmas Eve mass?

Just saw the most frivolous act of cowardice ever exerted by man, as a (likely) drunk miscreant insulted the altar boy's mushroom haircut. Unbeknownst to said bozo, the boy's father happened to be sitting across the aisle. He kept his cool, but as we headed for the exits, the father attacked the inebriated boozer with a collection basket, only for the drunk to flea into the darkness vowing to hire legal representation.

Just the nerve of some people. I knew that oaf would never have the guile to express his feelings to the boy's father's face. Im now hardly in the mood to go caroling.